Sunday (March 29,2009)

Travelled to Bukit Tambun, Simpang Ampat, Jawi, Sungai Udang, a Kuala which I don't know of the name, Tanjung Piandang. I was almost semi-paralysed sitting in the car for hours. Damn tired. Went to bed early. Did not update about song of the week.


Monday (March 30,2009)

First day of college. First lecture is Academic English 3 by Ms. Evelyn. Sadly she is not going to be with us for the whole semester. Surprisingly her hobby is fishing. Fishing wor? I can't believe my eyes when I saw her nails, so nicely done and polished. I don't believe her interest is fishing, despite her claim that she is from what Kelab Pemancing or whatsoever... kekekeke...

Back from college and I am off to work. Symphony BCSIS under Kelly Services. A new system, a new method of handling the cheques. Off from work and straight back home, before attending Joanne's b'day party.


Midnight, between Mon and Tue

At Sunset with a bunch of friends. Took a bottle or two of Heineken. There goes that ban of mine, the promise. Gotta restart all over again. That includes ciggs. Ish!!! A friend of mine went crazy, starts puking all over the place. Sad? Stress? I wonder what's the cause? Sigh...

CAR CLEANING. 2am - 5am. Hell I am tired. Both physically and mentally. Just so you know, whatever I did may be wrong, may be way off the line, too much... but I will never explain my actions. I don't have to.


Tuesday (March 31,2009)
Happy birthday Joanne. Off to car wash centre at 7:30 am. Meanwhile at college anticipating Professional Preparation Training from Mr. Mark, too bad its cancelled. The module is beginning next week. Here I am stuck in college, while the car is getting cleaned. Sigh... Suppose to go for baskin robbins today, guess no more.

Songs of the previous week (Update this week)

Tracks of My Tears (live) - Adam Lambert, American Idol Season 8
To Make You Feel My Love - Kris Allen, American Idol Season 8

Woooooohoooooo ..... yeayyyyy... yeayyyyy.... wahahaha... hahaha...

Haaa.... you guys probably think that CK has lost his mind, gone mad... become crazy... run amok but the fact is, it surpasses all that. It exceeds all those thoughts you have. Simply put it, what I feel now, how I feel now... is TOTALLY crazy but it is just too difficult to put it in words. I couldn't have been more delighted than I am, now that I know that despite screwing in my previous Org. Behavior final exam, I could still score well.

Man, getting an A for this subject means the world to me. I have to confess, I totally gave up, lowered my expectation to reduce the frustation and disappointment... but this is really... its just like God is giving me a second chance. Seriously, and until now, I still couldn't believe it. Well, I gotta say thanks to all those friends who was with me that day, when I was freaking down and emo (lol), and I definitely have to thank her, the one who confirmed me that everything was going to be okay.

Going through all these, I think learnt a thing or two. I have to be a lil more humble, stay a low profile and definitely help and assist more people. Don't be over-confident and know my limits. Perhaps this incident serves as a warning and a sign for me to change. I must change... I already changed but its going to take more time.

I have a song here to dedicate to everyone, myself included. Not really a fan of Miley Cyrus, but this song really caught my attention. Really inspiring. Very meaningful song.

Hey... hey... hey... I think my luck has changed. Hehehe... I think my luck is getting better lately. You must have wonder why I am saying this out of a sudden. Hmm... I went fishing again yesterday and damn it was fun. Let the pics do the talking.

Grouper. One aerola grouper and one orange spotted grouper.
"Koay Kao"
Snapper. One golden snapper. "Ang cho"
Catfish. Locally known as "toh-sat"
Marbled stargazer. Locally known as "hor hu"
Croaker. Locally known as "sam-ge"

Woke up at 6am. Out to sea at 7am. No breakfast, no lunch. Back home at 6pm. Tired? Yes... Fun... Definitely.

******* *******

Song of the week: Journey - Open Arms

Lying beside you, here in the dark, feeling your heart beat with mine
Softly you whisper, you're so sincere, how could our love be so blind
We sailed on together, we drifted apart, and here you are by my side

Chorus:
So now I come to you with open arms, nothing to hide, believe what I say
So here I am with open arms, hoping you'll see what your love means to me
Open arms

Living without you, living alone, this empty house seems to cold
Wanting to hold you, wanting you near, how much I wanted you home

But now that you've come back, turned night into day, I need you to stay

Chorus

Arghh... I am angry. Why? Again... why? What the hell the wrong with God? Why does He wants to fool me every single time. I couldn't have been more embarrassed than today. It is always like that, failing on me when things matters most. Stupid propeller bush. Why must you koink on me? Anyway, I rather cancel the plan than risking anyone's safety. Rather be embarrassed than to being non-rational. Its over. That's it.

Fixed. Tomorrow, I'm going again. Everyone seems to have fishing madness recently. My buddy Simon was freaking lucky he caught a grouper that day. Well, he shaved his hair bald. Maybe I should do the same thing. Shave my head bald. Be botak. Hmm... I wonder how will I look like if I am botak. LOL. Hahaha...

Well, I am really down today. Sad. Emo. Suppose to be a fun-filled day but then again, we plan, God decide. Argh!!!.... just can't stop argh!!!

Hmm... it's Saturday. The end of another week, the first Saturday after the disastrous college semester. Anyway, here I am sitting doing nothing, I was thinking that if I could make a list of motorcycles that I love and dream of owning one. This is what I came out with...

1. Honda NR750 (92)
Reason: Come on man, the only road-going bike in this world that uses OVAL pistons. On top of that 8 valves per chamber with a total of 32 valves on a compact V-4 750cc engine. Carbon fiber fittings all over the bike. Once, the most expensive road-going bike with limited production. Truly a dream come true if I can own one. Hehehe... =)

2. Honda VTR250 (09)
Reason: The first bike that I fell in love with. My recent addiction. I just wish Honda Malaysia can bring this model in. Hell I believe the sales figure will top that ugly looking Ninja 250. Trellis frame just looks beautiful. If I were in Honda's R&D, I would immediately request a project for a VTR400 or 600. Starting getting bored of CB400's and inline-fours. V-twin is the way to go.

3. Honda NSR250SP (93-94)
Reason: Boy-racer bike. Light weight, plenty of madness power for a 250 and hell yeah, Andy Lau rode one before in Full Throttle.

4. Triumph Bonneville T100 [50th anniversary] (2009)
Reason: It just brings back the memories. The sound of that parallel twin. Doop, doop, doop, doop. The styling... effing retro. Hit the road with an open face helmet and a leather jacket, damn cool. Maybe it just apply to me, hehehe =)

5. Triumph Street Triple (2009)
Reason: Its 3 cylinder engine. Very quirky styling, street fighter with dual headlamp. Fit this with a set of Jardine, hit the straights at illegal speed and you sound like an F1 car.

There you have it. Top 5 in my list. Nothing above a litre. An exotic V-Four, two entry level V-twin, one parallel twin that brings back the memories and one freaking awesome jet sounding Inline-Three.

That's it. Now, song of the week. A local artiste, James Baum. Title of the song, Locked in Love.

Whoa... I have to say I finally realize that I am such a pain in the ass. Well, all this while I do notice that I am someone who loves to brag, show off and deviate from norms. On top of that, at times I am someone whom you would call as "damage", that is that I make myself feel superior through the inferiority and misfortune of others. And yesterday, I learned my biggest lesson in life. My pros are actually the cons that break and tear me apart. SELF CONFIDENCE. That is why they say we should always practice moderation, too little and you are bullied, too much and you are dickhead.

As I have planned, I wanted to go on a solo bike trip around Penang island and yes I did it. Man i tell you, it is that fun. The best thing about riding a bike is that even though you don't have a destination to reach, you continue riding until you reach a dead end, you make a turn back, and continue to ride... until the next dead end, make another turn... and you just eat up the miles, reaching places you never reached, discover things you never did and seeing things you never thought seeing. Riding across those quiet winding roads, passing through those peaceful sub-urb, you just clears off all the shits and nonsense that is in your head. The road, the rider and the machine. The vibes, the sound, I gonna start talking mumbo-jumbo here, its really amazing how you just bond with the machine you ride. Its really difficult to put it in words. You just gotta experience it to know it.

Do check this link out, http://motorcycledaily.com/10march09_sharp&soft.htm

Studies shows that riding motorcycles can sharpen your brain. There is also a link to a very fascinating book (I want one of this too), Steven L. Thompson's fascinating book, Bodies in Motion, which tries to discover why some people are predisposed to riding motorcycles and some are not. Anyway guys, dump those 4 wheels and start turning on the ignition, kicking those starters (or press "start" them) and ride to work (or to school or college). Hehehe.

Review: My recently fitted rear tire, the Bridgestone Battlax BT45r actually outperforms my expectation. Okay, I have been riding the bike for a couple of months now, and I have to say, this tire really did change the bike a little if not a lot compared to the previous Michelin. The tire does inspire confidence in the rider even during some wet and uneven surfaces, the bike was still manageable. Hmm... the front Duro tire, the HF918, was surprisingly not that bad. Okay, it did scare me a lil', pushed too hard and the manoeuvres just gets messy. But overall, it is not bad, considering its price.

I think I rode pretty aggressive today, considering I tackled a few bends at triple digit speeds, above 100km/h (damn high), raced with some Mat rempits on mopeds(jeez they are fast) and hit the straights at illegal speeds. Hahaha... I am still alive. Well, CK is still alive to see the sun rise tomorrow and hopefully... CK will change his personality; to be a better man.

I am so angry with myself. I am so pissed at God. Why me? Why? What's your problem??? Why do you have to fool me this way? Its not as if everything was smooth sailing lately. I just couldn't stop blaming myself. And Bloody hell, why now? Why do this to me when things matter to me most?

If there is anything left for me to do now, it's to fuck my life. Why? Why was I born with this disability? I was I born with this flaw in me. I am nice to everyone, at least I think I am. Again, could it be ego? If it is, then I will just take my own life. Woohoo... I am yet again another statistic for Malaysian's who have ever thought of committing suicide. I so not contented. I feel that it is so FUCKING not worth it. Argh!!!!!

I will never ever forgive myself. But Hell I swear, I really thought I saw another word. I really do. Why prank me??? Going through life's hardest lesson... it will take time before I heal.

I LOVE AMERICAN IDOL!!!

Geez... I am crazy, hahaha... Sigh, exam is just a few more days and I am here shouting "I LOVE AMERICAN IDOL". Hmm... AI is very very exciting and interesting this year. TOP13, what the hell? Hahaha...

Hmm... I've got to thank American Idol contestant, Lil' Rounds for if it's not for her, I wouldn't know of this song. Be Without You by Mary J. Blige. This is the song of the week. I just can't stop repeating the song through winamp. Haha. This lyrics of this song is to be viewed with a positive mind.

Mary J. Blige - Be Without You (Live 2007 Grammy's)


Mary J. Blige - Be Without You (with lyrics)

Hmm... weird feeling, weird emotion clouding the atmosphere. How difficult it is for me to put in words and explain it to you guys, hell I think there are no words to describe this weird emotion. At last, all my assignments and presentations are over. The semester is coming to an end. Its amazing how time flies... day after day, months after months... years after years. Its going to be tough for me, but I think I will survive. I have finally understand and that is all thanks to watching 2 great movies recently, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button and The Notebook. Life, as how we see it, is measured in moments and not in hours or minutes.

People come and go but only few leaves an impact in our lives. Joining KDU on March 26 2007, I came in a stranger but who'd have ever imagine that I will leave this college with a lot of friends. Who'd have imagine that an enemy would be one of my best friend now? Who'd have imagine that her friend would end up as someone special in my life? You'll never know what life throws at you. They are surprises, God's gift to you.

I think there's nothing much I want to add in here. It's common and known to all that every meeting ends with some parting. Before any of my friends from Jan 07 semester leave, I have to apologize to you guys if I had offended any of you at any time. I don't think I meant to say those words or do those things.

Ending this post with a message to someone. I've kept my heart in a chest. The key to open the chest is with you. You can unlock the chest at any time, or you can ignore it. It is just another way of saying that I will wait for you. Why am I saying it now? I think we always appreaciate and realize the value when we are in the verge of losing something or someone. It is my fault at the beginning, it is still mine at the end. I wish to fix it. I hope time and fate allow me to fix it. Until that day comes, CK who is living his not so extraordinary life... shall wait patiently but hopefully not foolishly for her...

*praying hard*

First and foremost, I need help. I NEED HELP. Does anyone know where I can get a front tyre for my motorcycle? Haiya, I know it's in the motorcycle sparepart shop la. Problem is, sigh... they don't sell the size that I want and they are not willing to special order it for me. Stupid shop. Why can't they just order it for me? Anyway, the size that I need, 110/80-17 with a load rating of 57 or above and speed rating of H and above. Anyone... please help me find this tyre. I seriously need this. 110/70 just wouldn't do it, the load rating is just too low... about 40+ pounds off the standards. Any brand will do (except Duro, Cheng Sin, Kenda), preferably Maxxis M6002, Dunlop GT501, Bridgestone BT39.

Second, I don't know why I feel so worn out lately. Hmm... the sleeping disorder is long gone. I sleep well everynight, 8 hours a day but I still feel tired. Is stress having an effect on me? Well, I think I was being rather honest when I said that I have a 65-70% of stress in life. Money, money and money. Work, work and work. Argh... luckily I am able to handle stress well or I would have committed suicide long time ago. Hahaha... not really la... just joking.

Third, I wonder why is everyone so sad. Hmm... I know the semester is going to over soon, (one more week) and I know a lot of people are leaving but why should we be sad? Well, for me... my sad days are all over(could be true, could be a lie). I know certain memories are just too sweet, but come on, your friends gotta live their lives too. We should happy for them. For some people, stop being sad la, considering that you get to go to Australia for your degree. You eff-ing worry too much about your relatives who is going to be there. Do you wanna know what I think, if one has a determination... nothing can stop him/her. If you wanna rebel and have fun, I believe nothing can stop you. THEY ARE NOT GONNA TORTURE OR KILL YOU IF YOU DO. LOL.

Lastly, the song of the week to end this post. I know this is a rather sad song. But be positive.

I translated the lyrics for those banana's like me. Well, it cost me 15 or so minutes with the help of an online translation dictionary. Hehehe...

Frequently blame myself for initially I shouldn’t have
Frequently regret for I didn’t make you stay behind
What was the reason, we’re obviously in love
But finally we still have to be separated
Was it that we always kept to ourselves?

X2
Who’d have imagined meeting you again in a crowd?
Fate was determined as such, leaving us with no choice
These couple years passed on moderately
It was as if there was a person missing
But I gradually understand
That you are still my concern

How much love can start over?
How many people are willing to wait?
We return only when we appreciate
But not knowing that love, whether it still exist
How much love can start over?
How many people is worth waiting?
When love already vicissitudes
I’m not sure if I still have the courage to love