CK, the one who has it all but nothing at all. Judging by my first line, you'd probably guess it out that this is going to be yet another emo post by CK. Well, you guessed right. To be honest, I shouldn't be at home, online and blogging now. I was suppose to be out with a group of my friends. The initial plan was to get ourselves a bottle of liquor and probably get drunk before midnight. LOL. Anyway, I think you'd know by now that I didn't follow them. I confess, I wanted to go and I actually drove to college(how often do I drive), and I actually brought along my chillbox inside the trunk but a split second was all it took for me to change my mind.
So what was it that actually change my mind? Why did I change my mind? I don't think I would want to answer the questions here. All I can say is, I may "seem" happy at times, but I am definitely not near happy at all. Why did I laughed and joked about that matter? You'd probably mistaken me and thought that I feel that it was fun. Well, it's not fun to me. I thought that it would have created at least the slightest provocation but sad to say, I am wrong yet again. You were neutral maybe positive and happy. Hmm... I am out of words, I don't know what to say anymore.
CK, the one who has it all yet none to share with. Do you know what I feel? Well, the best things in life are free and the best things in life are definitely meant to be shared. I mean come on, you can't live a life being so self-centred and stingy. Back to me. I have a house to stay in, I have a car to drive, I have 3 motorcycles and I am definitely not in debt. I have sufficient cash to sustain my expenses, sufficient attention from my family members and definitely all the unnecessary attention I get from college. Wait. Something is not right. Something is missing from this ideal, close to perfect picture. What is it that I don't have? What is missing from my life? Geez... I am a very complicated guy. Blogging about something so deep, something a typical 20 years old teenager would never understand or thought of. Guess what, I am a weirdo.
Sigh, sigh, sigh... that is what I can do. I showed my interest, I place forward my intention... and what is the last thing that I would expect from you is a cool treatment. Whoa... is there a need? I have done nothing wrong okay. It's starting to get really really weird. Anyhow, I choose to ignore it. Typical CK, the great pretender... did anything happened? NO. If your response is negative, I would understand and respect you. No worries here. But seriously, one question that I don't even have the answer to. How sure are you things wouldn't work out? I am not sure myself that things will work out. God knows...
So what was it that actually change my mind? Why did I change my mind? I don't think I would want to answer the questions here. All I can say is, I may "seem" happy at times, but I am definitely not near happy at all. Why did I laughed and joked about that matter? You'd probably mistaken me and thought that I feel that it was fun. Well, it's not fun to me. I thought that it would have created at least the slightest provocation but sad to say, I am wrong yet again. You were neutral maybe positive and happy. Hmm... I am out of words, I don't know what to say anymore.
CK, the one who has it all yet none to share with. Do you know what I feel? Well, the best things in life are free and the best things in life are definitely meant to be shared. I mean come on, you can't live a life being so self-centred and stingy. Back to me. I have a house to stay in, I have a car to drive, I have 3 motorcycles and I am definitely not in debt. I have sufficient cash to sustain my expenses, sufficient attention from my family members and definitely all the unnecessary attention I get from college. Wait. Something is not right. Something is missing from this ideal, close to perfect picture. What is it that I don't have? What is missing from my life? Geez... I am a very complicated guy. Blogging about something so deep, something a typical 20 years old teenager would never understand or thought of. Guess what, I am a weirdo.
Sigh, sigh, sigh... that is what I can do. I showed my interest, I place forward my intention... and what is the last thing that I would expect from you is a cool treatment. Whoa... is there a need? I have done nothing wrong okay. It's starting to get really really weird. Anyhow, I choose to ignore it. Typical CK, the great pretender... did anything happened? NO. If your response is negative, I would understand and respect you. No worries here. But seriously, one question that I don't even have the answer to. How sure are you things wouldn't work out? I am not sure myself that things will work out. God knows...
Sorry to say this to someone.
If what my friend told me is true,
If what we guessed prove to be genuine,
Then sorry is all I can say to you.
I don't know what is it that you see in me but whatever it is,
I do hope that the other two sees it.
If there's one whom I am so crazy about, its the other.
If there's one whom I so not over with, its another.
I am not perfect.
I fail to see that...
I may be choosing, but so are others.
I may make people as options but me myself is an option.
If there is one advice that I could still remember from one of my true friends...
"DON'T PRIORITIZE THOSE WHO TREATS YOU AS AN OPTION"
If what my friend told me is true,
If what we guessed prove to be genuine,
Then sorry is all I can say to you.
I don't know what is it that you see in me but whatever it is,
I do hope that the other two sees it.
If there's one whom I am so crazy about, its the other.
If there's one whom I so not over with, its another.
I am not perfect.
I fail to see that...
I may be choosing, but so are others.
I may make people as options but me myself is an option.
If there is one advice that I could still remember from one of my true friends...
"DON'T PRIORITIZE THOSE WHO TREATS YOU AS AN OPTION"
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