I just learnt the best lesson in life that I think I won't forget for the rest of my life. What is the most dangerous and sabotaging thing that you can do to yourself? You'll probably think cutting your own wrist, drinking poison or maybe just dash out into the middle of a busy street. Guess what? You're wrong. The most dangerous and sabotaging thing you can do to yourself is being curious and you start to ask the question "why". Now I understand the reason why people refuses to ask questions even if they don't know, even if they are left in the dark. I think they feel that it is best to be left in the dark. Sometimes, asking the question "why" gives you the ugliest, hard to swallow fact that you either can't face or choose to avoid.
Well, how does it feel like to give up even before you try? At least if you tried, you tasted the bitterness ... then you give up. And now, being slap with facts... you are left with no options but to either forget trying or fail in trying. Well, I think I've had enough. Enough failures in life. I am not sure if I can take another blow. I will just blame it on luck, fate and TIMING. Exactly like those words mentioned in the lyrics from the song by Whitney Houston and George Michael, "If you think that we'll lose what we have, Then I'd just rather stay (rather stay) the same". The gamble is just too big for me. As usual, I am in over my head.
Just so you know, if I had chosen to proceed trying... I wouldn't at all mind sacrificing my all for you. I don't care what it takes; let's keep it short and simple... I will try my best and persevere to gain your love at all cost. But knowing what the result might be, knowing how you would respond and react, it just scares me to think of all these. I don't want my sacrifices to be worthless. Enough. All this time, my efforts just go un-notice. Enough. I can't take it anymore. Here, if you knew that no matter how hard you try, how bad you want it to happen... you'll just end up being that small unsignificant guy in her heart... then would you even try? Would you even bother to try? I think I have been stupid countless of times; I am a good guy... but I am just not that noble or stupid to try.
A new song for this week. Its performed by DSDS (Deutschland sucht den Superstar). The title of the song, Cry On My Shoulder. At first, this song was suppose to be dedicated to her. What irony... I will just self dedicate this to myself. I think I will need it more than she does.
Well, how does it feel like to give up even before you try? At least if you tried, you tasted the bitterness ... then you give up. And now, being slap with facts... you are left with no options but to either forget trying or fail in trying. Well, I think I've had enough. Enough failures in life. I am not sure if I can take another blow. I will just blame it on luck, fate and TIMING. Exactly like those words mentioned in the lyrics from the song by Whitney Houston and George Michael, "If you think that we'll lose what we have, Then I'd just rather stay (rather stay) the same". The gamble is just too big for me. As usual, I am in over my head.
Just so you know, if I had chosen to proceed trying... I wouldn't at all mind sacrificing my all for you. I don't care what it takes; let's keep it short and simple... I will try my best and persevere to gain your love at all cost. But knowing what the result might be, knowing how you would respond and react, it just scares me to think of all these. I don't want my sacrifices to be worthless. Enough. All this time, my efforts just go un-notice. Enough. I can't take it anymore. Here, if you knew that no matter how hard you try, how bad you want it to happen... you'll just end up being that small unsignificant guy in her heart... then would you even try? Would you even bother to try? I think I have been stupid countless of times; I am a good guy... but I am just not that noble or stupid to try.
A new song for this week. Its performed by DSDS (Deutschland sucht den Superstar). The title of the song, Cry On My Shoulder. At first, this song was suppose to be dedicated to her. What irony... I will just self dedicate this to myself. I think I will need it more than she does.
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