Life. How should we live our lives? Who determines the paths in our lives? How can we know that the choices we made yesterday will affect us in some other way today, tomorrow and the days ahead of us. But sad to say, that is not the issue here. One question that always lingers on in my mind, why are we put through all those unnecessary dramas? Some dramas are sad enough to made you cry and you cry. Certain other dramas, though they are none of your concern, affects you and hurt you so badly that all you could do is be a lil' emphatic and cry together with her but that wouldn't help it either.

Seriously, last night was the last straw for me. I admit I was drunk last night. Not tipsy but drunk. Ask anyone that was with me that night (you go figure out). Try to ask them what I did and what I would have done. Though certain thing I did were not something that I am very proud of that I can boast with my friends, but I have to say... if you are reading this, and if you think its you... Tell me what can I do just to make you feel better, and I swear to God that if I am able to do that task for you, I wouldn't blink an eye, I wouldn't think twice and I'll definitely won't hesitate.

To be frank I'm starting to miss that cheerful character of yours and second to none is definitely your smile. I couldn't remember when was the last time I see you smile. Not a smile that is fake, burdened by that issue of yours. A pure smile is what I meant. Hey, I know that some people will be puzzled with what I am writing here. Well, if you wanna know more... just ask me la okay. Don't go create stories. I don't have the whole day to write all the details here and the last thing I need is some irresponsible guy who make wild guesses and start spreading rumors faster than he/she can spread bacteria.

Anyway, back to the story. For anyone who knows me well, they will know that I have a soft spot for girls that cry. Hey, I am born that way and I don't intend to change. Probably I am unable to change. Sigh... Back to last night... if I can use only one word to describe last night... it has got to be either mad(pissed off) or sad(down/emo). The moment I saw you cry, phoof... I just went phoof... I don't know how to say it here. I can't find the appropriate words. CK is outta words. Seriously, I feel your pain. But please promise me... that your tears will all dry up, promise me that you'll be strong and you won't waste a tear for such a useless good-for-nothing scumbag. Promise me that last night was the final night that you cry because of him. For God's sake, he is enjoying at the expense of your pain and suffering. But that is if you read this blog, and if you think its directed to you... its you lo.

Haihz... busy talking and showing concern about others while me myself is too tired to take notice of the things happening in my own life. Kepo is what they all say but sad to tell them that I just couldn't help it but to show concern. Again here, few friends of mine should know what I am talking about. They should know why I am kepo. They should know why I show concern. And I think I have to eat my words. The past is not always the history. Ehhh... I know I am going to get into trouble with my post here... but who gives damn about it. I am always asking for chances and I ask for only one chance now. I hope I didn't cross the line.

*fingers crossed*

Something to add here... a chinese song by the title of "unguessable"... an excerpt from the lyrics...

| If a sudden far, a sudden close escape
| is the freedom you want,
| then I rather go back to the life of being alone.
| If a sudden cold, a sudden hot warmth
| is your excuse,
| then I rather to have never been serious with you.

I wonder if I'm the one with a sudden far and a sudden close escape, I wonder if I'm the one that is cold at times and hot warmth at other times. Judging by last night, I think I will just take the blame. Anyway, when is CK not at fault... never... CK is guilty...

Hi guys, CK is back again and I think I have a few things to share with guys.

First and foremost, my bike almost broke down again. Almost but just not yet, hehehe. Sigh, just like old people, old bikes are also more prone to illness and diseases. Nonetheless, the difference is that bikes are just machines... a human life is much more valuable(like obviously, duh!!!). Anyway, talking about how my bike almost succumb to illness, it was all due to a small rubber O-ring on the radiator. The bike was leaking coolants all the way to the workshop. I was so afraid the bike might just stall mid-way or blown up into pieces, hahaha. Hmm... and I thought the repair would burn a hole in my pocket, luckily the mechanic just charged me RM10. Luckily; LOL.

The second thing is something I am not proud of. Last weekend was pretty messed up for me. I told myself that I just gotta keep my cool but somehow I lost it. Damn it!!! F@#% it anyway. Idiot deserves it. Who ask him to come asking for it. I did warn him not to provoke me again but he just didn't want to believe me. Fine. Now, he is paying for it; a swollen eye. LOL. Nevertheless, the issue is over. I don't wish to talk about the past no more. Let bygones be bygones.

The third thing is that I am pretty messed up myself. Hmm... a quote from Goo Goo Dolls song titled Name, "scars are souvenirs you never lose, the past is never far". Well, I agree with quote and it actually reflects on my real life, at least it reflects the situation now. Mind you, I am using the word "past", meaning it is the past, history. My past was never far. Anyhow, I gotta keep a distance unless I am left with no options. So far so good I can say.

The forth and maybe the most common thing is that, I am still counting. It has been close to 2 weeks and 5 days since I last met her face to face. I know why people call me dumb cause her house is just like maybe less than 5 KM from my house. Everyone said I can just drive over to her house. Well, I don't think they really understand. It's not the distance. It's not how far. Even if it is a matter of distance, I am pretty sure no one can measure it, for there is no metric unit for it.

Lastly, it's Christmas eve today. Wow, talking about how fast time flies. Another year is going to be over. Hmm... no Christmas wishes this year. Duh!!! let's be realistic. The world's economy is facing a recession now and our Santa is probably feeling the pinch too; LOL. Back to being serious, I think I am going to be pretty insane tonight, hehehe. That was how I celebrated it last year and considering that I am celebrating it the same way this time around, things wouldn't change that much. I will keep you guys informed of the progress. That's it for now... back to work...

I confess that I am a workaholic. For this holiday, I had actually applied for the lab assistant job in KDU and I was accepted. Hmm... I may not earn much from it, but I did learn a lot from the job. Well, I started the job on Tuesday morning, being my first day on the job it was something like of a training. I learned about how the login system works, how the queueserver printing system works and how to scan documents for students. I admit, the job is pretty boring but I guess I shouldn't complain too much.

There is another thing that I have to confess. I hate Maybank. Maybank sucks. Working with KDU, I was required to have an account in Maybank in order for them to bank in my salary for me. I didn't have one, so I was asked to open an account with Maybank. Okay, I had just learn about the psychology of waiting in Services Marketing class and I know why waiting will feel much longer than they actually is. Fine. Well, is 1.5 hours waiting long enough? I was asked to wait for my turn and there was only 2 customers who came before me. I am wondering why the bank workers need 1.5 hours to handle 2 customers. For God's sake, it's ONLY 2 customers. Why do they need 45 minutes for one customer? Anyway, its done. I don't wanna talk about it anymore.

Not done yet. I still have one thing to confess. I love my bike. I just love it so much. Hmm.. how fast can a 650cc V-Twin go? 1st gear at 8500rpm, it reaches 80km/h, shift up and you're engaged with the second gear which brings you up to 120km/h, shift up again and you will be exceeding the speed limit and you can feel the torque all across the rev. Extra info to share with you, reaching 100km/h just takes about 4 secs. Not joking here. It is my first time experiencing such a broad torque curve on any motorcycle. Suddenly, I feel that small bikes are really so underpowered. Anyway, the fastest I ever went with the bike is 160km/h and damn it's fast. However speed kills. Someone, anyone please constantly remind me that I will get myself killed if I don't stop this madness and addiction to speed.

OKAY. Maybe I have one last thing to confess. Sorry, I promise this is the last one.

I miss her. It is just so difficult. It has been like almost a week, seven days and a hundred and sixty eight hours since I last saw her face to face. I am starting to think that if a week has become a time period which is so long, how am I gonna cope with it when she leaves and it is real soon before she leaves. Hmm... how can one fall and fall so deep, a question I ask myself every single day before sleep. Jokes or not, she is the first thing I think of every morning and the last thing that I think of before I sleep. One will ask, does she deserves it? Answer is YES. Ask me today, ask me tomorrow, ask me next week, next month, next year and the answer will always remain as YES, always and forever.

I end this post with a song to share with you guys. The title is Waiting For You, by Anson Hu.

Holidays are so boring... Haiz... Rotting at home...

Funny is, I guess it is holidays for the fishes too. I went fishing lately, but to my surprise, for once... I came back empty handed. EMPTY HANDED. I had been following my dad fishing for at least 5 years now and never once did I came back empty handed. Well, everything has its first time. Where has all the luck gone to??? Most importantly, where has all the fishes gone to... ? Please come back soon, LOL.

With no fishes to catch, fishing eventually becomes boring. In order to save myself from boredom, I resorted to digging for shellfish. I am not sure of the exact name in English, but I am damn sure the Malays call it siput remis and we Chinese just call is siput. So what did we do with the siput? Well, if there is one reason I love mum's cooking is because of this siput. Hehehe. She is so good at preparing it, thick soy sauce, lots of ginger and sugar... Yummy...

They are beautiful isn't it? They are yummy too... after it is cooked and prepared by mum, Hehehe

Mum is very active lately. She has been baking cake non-stop. 2 fruit cakes and 2 butter cakes in one week. All finished up within one week. Hmm... wondering why I can't get any fatter...

Today, she made some curry puffs and damn they are tasty. And they look beautiful too. So they say you gotta serve the eye first before the mouth... Hahaha... well take a look at the curry puffs... the pastry has a very unique shell-like design...

Yummy!!! I am so gonna gain weight this hols (hopefully)

At last, the exam week is over. After a long and tiring battle with the exam paper, I can finally get the rest that is so ever needed. For your info, I am a guy who loves sleeping but for the past week, I have not been getting sufficient sleep. Maximum sleep that I had for a night in the past week is 5 hours if I am not mistaken. Sigh, I could still recall that one of the girls in college actually said that I was getting thinner and thinner and I think the insufficient sleep is the main culprit. Is that a good thing? Certainly not. LOL. Any thinner and I will be blown away by the winds...

Nevertheless, the end of exams means the beginning of the holidays. Some welcome it, others just don't know what to do with their holidays to a point where even some claimed that they will lose their sense of direction. Well, it doesn't make sense to me anyway. There are plenty of things to do for the holidays. And come on, haven't you guys forgot that you were complaining about being so tired handling all those assignments? Grab this opportunity to take some rest and maybe reflect back on the past. For those who are workaholics, you may grab this chance to gain some work experience and at the same time earn some extra cash...hehehe.

*** continue pt 2 ***

I noticed that I have changed a lot lately. Previously, I don't listen to chinese songs and needless to say, how would I even get addicted to it if I don't listen to them. Now, time has passed. Things have changed. I listen to chinese songs and I listen to the same song repeatedly for hours sometimes. Guess I am going nuts. I can't seem to figure out what was the reason that is causing this until... finally I think I got the answers.

Looking back in the past, once, there was this one individual that managed to change my perception about motorcycles. I was a very determined but stubborn guy in the past (and still is now) and I thought no one could ever easily change my perception or mindset. However, guess I wrong. That particular individual did manage to change my perception and attributing the same factor for this "addiction to chinese songs" problem, I am pretty sure someone has influenced me in some way in terms of my music and song selection.

Haiya, I am sure I don't have to mention who that someone is. Just take a guess and you already have the answer. No matter who that someone is; the change in my perception about motorcycles did not last long, maybe because that someone has become a chapter in my life. On the other hand, I feel that the change in my music and song selection will last long and even become permanent. Why? Maybe because this "someone" is not a chapter in my life. Maybe this "someone" is different. Maybe this "someone" is more important and significant...

Summary: there are TWO significant individuals in my life. One changed my perception about motorcycles, the other changed my view/perception about chinese songs. One shall remain as history, the other... is the present and I hope she will be the future. Anyway, hopes are just hopes and shall remain as hopes. As one of my ex-classmates did mention to me, if it is yours, you can't escape from it even if you want to...

I don't even know why am I blogging now. Exam is just around the corner (in one week time) yet I am still in relaxation mode. Here I am, writing nonsense about myself. For God's sake, I should be studying now but something just bothers me. May I ask why must it happen now? Am I not worried about exam? The apparent answer is no. I am worried but then my mind gets distracted and there goes all my attention needed to revise for the upcoming exam.

Life is full of choices. We make up our mind and it is just too difficult for us to turn back and change our decision. Approximately 6 months ago, I went through what I may say the darkest moments of my life. I had no one to turn to, no one to lean on and worse, I lost my sense of direction. That very moment, I thought I learned my lesson. But I guess I was being too naive....

Once a while, you meet people in your life. While some may not have significant effects on your life, others create a whole lot of impact making them far more important that anyone else. Luck could be the only reason that explains why we meet them. For me, I couldn't be more thankful for I meet that someone when I was at the lowest point of my life. Nothing much has changed though. Perhaps fate decided that things weren't suppose to change at all. Anyhow, should I be glad that there was no changes? Frankly, I don't even have an answer myself...

Giving up was never easy. That was why it took me so long to let go in the past. Growing up in a somewhat discriminatory environment taught me that I have got to be tough and resilient and I thought I was tough and resilient. Nonetheless, these past few days proved me wrong. I didn't wanted to give up. I hold true to the saying "never say die". In fact, I have not given up. But giving in? What is giving in? Never have I encounter such words in this matter but who cares anyway. If giving up is gonna be tough, giving in is even tougher I guess.

What is the measure of love? Before that, what is love?, a frequently asked question by those who suffers from unrequited love. How do we measure one's love for another human being? Hmm... to anyone who has the answer, do share with me. If love is to be measured by the wealth you own, then what about those who were married in the kampungs and how do you explain why their marriage lasted so long. If it is to be measured by the things that is sacrificed for him/her, how do you explain love at first sight?

The most important question we have to constantly ask and remind ourself, what was it that made us fell in love with him/her. Smart people give reasons such as, 'oh, she is beautiful', 'she is smart' and lame excuses such as 'she was the one who was attracted to me first'. For those who are drowned in love, they places them above everything else, likened them to god and goddess. Back to the question, I don't even know why I fell in love with her. I guess you don't need a reason to love someone. There is just no reasoning in love... it is just not some math equation.

A statement I have to make here. It was not a competition neither it is now. It doesn't work that way, at least I believe so. There is no winner or loser. She is not the winning trophy. There is no first prize or consolation prize. Enough fighting and comparing. Comparison makes the whole effort seem fake, untrue and dishonest. Conclusion, I am done. I am done fighting, done struggling. Mind you though, this is not the end. Done fighting doesn't mean I gave up. Done struggling doesn't mean I give in.

This week is not going to be a very pleasurable week. To start the week with such an issue, it is the last thing any living person would ask for. Well, what goes around comes around. It was easy for me to say back then; to just ignore comments and other's opinion. Back then, I was not the victim. Now, it's a totally different story.

Well, I can't blame others for their curiosity. I, myself did contributed to this problem. Being a loud person, I don't really care if others may hear what I have just said. Nonetheless, this, my friends, is different. This does not only involve me as it also involves another individual. I am not seeking for fame nor am I looking for glory. I pray hard to control myself. I hope I will get through this issue alive. That's if they stop what they are doing now or it's going to be their funeral. The sight of those people, I may not be a big sized guy, I may not be a street fighter but nothing beats a guy whose heart is full of rage. I, myself don't even know what I am capable of... at least when I am angry.

Well, do I sound like the green beast a.k.a the Hulk, "you don't like me when I'm angry?" LOL. Anyway, there is a statement that I have to make. If I can respect you/anyone, I hope for nothing back in return except the same kind/amount of respect given to you/anyone. I would really appreciate it if anyone or any of you guys whom I recognize and acknowledge as friends to ask me personally if you are concerned or have an interest over matters about my life. I don't need free publisity in college (enough popularity, okay?) and I certainly don't need gossips and grapevines flowing around classes. This, I beg of you; if you don't respect me, the least you can do is to respect that other individual.

This, I have to stress. I AM NOT JOKING HERE neither am I making a FOOL out of myself. Don't push it. Don't cross the borderline. Don't exceed the limit. I can tell you, you are this close to making me lose control. That my friend is the limit that you should know. Again, I am asking you nicely to stop all the nonsense you are doing. If you have your personal agenda or if it's just for fun, well read this, "GO GET A LIFE".

Okay, done talking about college and people in college. Now, time to update you guys on my recent fishing trip this past weekend. THREADFIN. I think it's their season this time of the year. A few kilos everyday, for two days. Hehehe. Allow me to show you guys a pic of the biggest threadfin I caught recently. May not be big for you guys, but it is big enough for me. =D

A few kilos. Maybe 12 kilos. Hehehe...


Biggest threadfin for the day, weighing at 600+ grams and 16 inches in length.

I AM ANGRY!
I AM EXTREMELY PISSED OFF!
NO WORDS DESCRIBE MY ANGER NOW.

I JUST WANT A PUNCHING BAG.
GIVE ME A PUNCHING BAG.
someone...
ARGH!!!

I have just got to love fishing. Fishing is so fun... I have been fishing for two days in a row, Saturday and Sunday. I guess dad was in good mood, LOL. On Saturday, he took me and my bro all the way to Kuala Sungai Pinang and for your info, it is further than Monkey Beach and Pantai Kerachut and it's not that polluted stinking Sungai Pinang. After setting up the boat, we set journey to this Kuala Sungai Pinang. So you would be wondering how was the boat ride. To be honest, it was kinda boring; LOL. How do you describe a ride on an Explorer F17 powered by a Suzuki 15HP outboard motor? SLOW. It took us approximately 40 minutes to reach this Kuala Sungai Pinang from the place where we parked the boat.

I have to say being a Penangite, everyone should go for a boat ride around Penang island. No words can describe it. I am speechless when we travelled so far to this Kuala Sungai Pinang, we pass by Batu Feringghi, Teluk Bahang, Monkey Beach and Pantai Kerachut. Who ever say the beaches in Penang is dirty and polluted (minus Gurney Drive)? My honest opinion, I would say Penang has one of the best beaches in Malaysia, probably the world. Anyway, once we reach there, we lay down our nets in search for baits. Our mission on Saturday, to look for grouper. As usual, bro took along all his fishing gears (show off). After getting enough baits (live prawns and cuttlefish), we proceed to fish at nearby places near rocky beaches.

So did we manage to get any grouper? Well, a lot of groupers. Not joking. Okay, maybe they aren't a kilo or two in size, we did manage to caught a lot of small groupers, baby groupers. Sigh, I am really really pissed off. I don't have a camera or at least a good camera or I would have taken lots and lots of pics. Time for me to save money to get a good water resistant camera, hehehe. After getting enough groupers, we decided that we should head home before it gets too dark. Yet again, another 40 minutes ride back. We almost didn't have enough fuel to reach Tanjung Bungah forcing us to go for a pit stop at Batu Ferringhi to refuel with a guy named Ah Boon. He is no baboon okay, he is a nice guy. If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't have reached home on Saturday night.

Tiredness never stop me or dad from fishing. Bro is totally knocked out after one whole day at the sea. Today, we set out to sea in search for the mullets I showed you guys that day. Well, the weather was fine in the morning, yet when it reaches mid-day, it started drizzling then raining. This is worsened by strong winds and waves. Nonetheless, we did manage to get ourselves some fish. Hehehe. Mullets of course, prawns definitely and promfets. Yupz, promfets. Let me upload the pic of the mullets and promfets I caught.

Pic of promfets I caught. This are caught, look properly and you will see the markings of the net. And look at the silver scales, they are fresh. Hehehe.

Hmm... this is a surprise. This is King of Mullets. Though only one, this King of Mullets is 14 inches in length, compared to the normal ones, 6 inches.

Before I end this post, I bet you guys had probably heard of the "electric fish". You guys had probably heard of how it will shock you with the currents generated from its body. Well, you know what, I managed to caught our very own local "electric fish". It doesn't look like a fish, it's a ray, an electric ray. Yupz, you heard me right... For your info, it is very very cute. Extremely cute. It's black in color, soft, slimy with two small tiny eyes. Hahaha. Forgive me for being so excited. This is my first encounter with an "electric ray"... I checked the Internet and based on wikipedia, it is called the finless sleeper ray under the Narkidae family. Its binomial name is Temera hardwickii, what a cute name for a cute fish. Here are two pics of the "electric ray" ...ZZZ

It is just very small, seems harmless and damn cute.
There are 2 white spots on the right and left.

Touch me and I will "surprise" you!!!

Well, that's it for now. I need to get some rest now. Dad is back to work and I am back to college. Will keep you guys updated on my next fishing trip...

Hot day. Rough sea. Strong currents. None of this is going to stop me from fishing today and I am really glad I went fishing today. Though my body is falling apart and breaking into pieces after 7 hours in the middle of the sea, it is not a big issue considering the catch I got today. Fish, prawns, mantis prawns (love it), crabs and swamp crab. Hahaha... A variety of seafood at no cost. Okay, maybe at one cost. I am getting dark, really really dark. Sunburn, LOL. Anyway, let the pics do the talking.

A snapshot of a swamp crab and a big mantis prawn I caught today.

A snapshot of flower crabs before I boil and feast on them. =)


A snapshot of the fish I caught. Name? Err... mullets??

Finally, it came to my senses that fishing is actually a great activity to do when you're free. You don't waste money, in fact you earn. Yupz, you earn money. The mullets you saw up there, guess how much is it per kilo? Its RM17.00 per kilo. Me and my dad, we managed to caught 14 kilos of that mullet. Hmm... anyway, it's not the money that attracts me. Its the fun you had on the boat, pulling in the nets and looking at all the catches. As extra, I don't even have to go to the gym to stay fit. This is the secret of how I stay fit, lots and lots of fishing...

This is going to be a very short post.

Trip to Bukit Genting

Petrol: RM20.00
Food: RM100.00
Baskin Robbins: RM18.00

The 3 hours at Bukit Genting
[Fun]
The photos taken at Bukit Genting
[Precious]
The smile on everyone's face, Especially yours...
[PRICELESS]

| OVERWHELMED | Is there a better word to replace it? What about EXTREMELY OVERWHELMED? That is the feeling I had today, on my b'day, my 19th b'day. If there is anything that I will ever forget, today, October 30 2008, will be the last thing to go kaput from my mind. How do you express yourself? Being 19, your college friends, important to note that they are all young ladies, beautiful young ladies in fact, standing in front of your house gate, singing a b'day song, holding a cake, greeting you with a smile... and you on the other hand, had no such thought of celebrating your b'day at all, partly naked, trying your hardest to meet your assignment dateline. I am out of words actually. Speechless in fact...

How do you deal with such situation? To be honest, I am touched. Truly touched. It made me realize that having friends is the best thing you can ask for in life. All this while, I have to confess that my close to 2 years in college, I have never been in any "groups". I mix and befriend everyone in college which makes me feel that I don't belong anywhere. As a matter of fact, I feel lonely. Well tonight really changed my whole perception about my life. My plain and dull, can I say boring fashion/clothes I wear in college, its always a pair of jeans and a T-shirt that doesn't makes me stand out among the crowds. My nerdish look with that orange-colored frame spectacles, I am always perceived as a book worm, and again, plain, dull and boring. I have to thank God, for God's gift of knowledge to me was the only defense I have again such society. Well, I live my life my way... as always I was never a trend setter but neither was I a conformist to what is generally accepted.

I thank God tonight. This seldom and rarely happens to me. I wouldn't feel ashamed if I did say that I almost cried because the real fact is I almost cried. There is nothing wrong with a guy my age crying. Any guys who are not moved by such stunt, singing loudly in front of your house gate, wishing you Happy Birthday, I mean are they such people in this world? They must have a heart made of stone, they are probably too cool, icing cool in fact. I know I am being very expressive now, very emotional involved, but learn to accept this. This is the normal CK. A CK that talk nonsense all the time, and I would be lucky if you guys understand half the thing I wrote here.

I am very blessed. My b'day wish actually materialize. I actually did for once in my 19 years, celebrated my b'day with a group of friends. I enjoyed their company. And just for that little extra, those who planned it, I am amazed. To pull such trick on me, to actually try to make my day special, I will not hesitate if I have to take a bullet for them. Going back to those who did came and made my day special, that very person, in a green tee, you're simply amazing, truly mesmerizing, absolutely captivating and purely fascinating. You deserve it. In fact I did told one of my friend, when you were in the computer lab, I couldn't see anyone but you; you were there on a white shirt and that is even before I entered the lab. Okay, take it as joke but I am not blind. I can see things even though I need the help from a pair of spectacle. Say what you guys wanna say. I couldn't be bothered anymore.

Somehow, there is this deep feeling of regret in me. Why didn't I notice her earlier? Knowing that this could very well be my final b'day that we can celebrate together, I don't know how I can face that very day, the day she is leaving to pursuit her dreams. I am not a self-centred guy. I will never hold back someone, even if she means everything, even if she meant the world to me. That would never be called love. That is being unfair to everyone. Have you ever thought that if she has the same feeling? Does she wanna stay, obviously not. I mean I have no right to hold her back just because I couldn't get there. Sigh, I am ... I ... I admit, if you ever need to feel how does it feel like to love someone, you only need one girl and just once and it is more than enough for a lifetime and that very girl i meant, is definitely her. You will always have that very special place in my heart. Just so you know, if this is fake, then nothing is real.

Throwing such surprises for me tonight, I did once joke that I may suffer a heart attack and pass out. Well, seems like instead of me fainting, it has affected me emotionally and psychologically which leads me to blog about this. I am a changed man after tonight. Tonight, I made a vow, to always continue to be who I am, who I want to be, and to just stay original being CK. I don't have to change the way I talk, the way I socialize just to fit into the society. My friends showed me proof tonight. Anyway, fear not, for there is always tomorrow. Tomorrow, an adventure for four of my lucky friends, three friends and one which I regard as more than friend. I wouldn't know if you are reading this, but if you are, I do believe you know my feelings for you. And... a big surprise is heading your way to. So just be prepared......

Okay, I have just receive the BEST ang pow from God. That is no bruises or major injuries on my body despite that terrible accident. But I just can help it but to demand for more. There are 2 list, one the tangible wish list for physical goods and object, second the intangible wish list for the non-physical objects or responses.

The TANGIBLE WISH LIST

1. A new bike
2. A scholarship for me to go Oz to further my studies
3. A riding jacket (though i already have one; LOL)
4. A new helmet ( preferably Airoh Mathisse RS [black])
5. DEFINITELY MORE MONEY...

The INTANGIBLE WISH LIST

1. An answer for a question forwarded to someone
   
2. Friends' company on my birthday
3. Become TOP STUDENT in KDU
4. My health and my safety (and that includes her health and safety)
   
5. Get the bike as soon as possible (before dad changes his mind)

I guess you can't find any person that has a thicker face than me already.
Dare I post my wish list here in this blog. Memang thick face. LOL.
Anyway, let's hope they materialize.
*** Cross my fingers ***

Hello everyone... I am extremely happy today. The reason is because people around me are happy. Being surrounded by positive people really made me realize that we must think positively and optimistically. Hmm... assignments are building up but somehow, I couldn't be bothered about them. Anyway, there is still a very long period of time before the due date so enjoy now, suffer later? Who cares; LOL.

Hmm... someone gave me a pleasant surprise yesterday. The Management of Human Resource lecture is somehow getting ... interesting. I love the lecturer's new approach of showing us that video. Let's hope the positive trend continue... Finally the business club is getting active again. Though i am not involved in it anymore, at least my friends get to participate. Yea... some of them are leaving soon, it will be great if they can get some good testimonials from the new club advisor, Theresa.

I was logging in to my friendster page and I notice this bulletin posted by one my friend titled "100 truths about me". Hmm.. sounds interesting to me so I checked it out. It was kinda funny. Some questions are stupid; LOL. Here are some examples (not all 100 questions la...) about me...

Are you perfect?
What is perfect??? No one is perfect and that includes me.

Do you have anything bothering you?
Yes. Its been like 4 months or so.

Are you a friendly person?
Errr... I think so. But sometimes, i am anti-social. LOL

Where did you sleep last night?
Idiot, I slept in my room la...
(following question)
Why did you sleep there?
If I am not sleeping in my room, then where am I suppose to sleep? TOILET???

Are you missing someone?
Hmm... I would be lying if I say NO. "Nothing occupies my mind except the thoughts of you"

Are you single?
Sadly, yes... I am single.

Are you smart?
Stupid people ask this kinda question. Foolish people answer such question. I refuse to answer.

Final 2 questions require you to answer truthfully.
DO YOU LIKE SOMEONE?
YES, I DO.

ARE YOU SERIOUSLY HAPPY WITH WHERE YOU ARE IN LIFE NOW?
NOPE. Life is full of endless possibilities. I may not be happy, but I am contented.