I am not myself lately; LOL. Even my brother was shocked to find out that I am listening to chinese songs lately. As a matter of fact, I am addicted to chinese songs. Hmm... wondering what is causing this.

For those who know me, I don't speak chinese (mandarin and cantonese) neither do I understand them. So why am I listening to chinese song since I don't understand them? Well, chinese songs I listen to are those that fall under the emo songs category; LOL. To be honest, chinese songs are not that bad actually. Performers such as Wang Lee Hom is able to "give life" to his song and somehow, I feel kinda connected to his songs or at least one of them, Wei Yi or Only One. My comment for this song, how romantic can a man get??? Well, judge it yourself.



It will be best if you can check out the lyrics and understand them. I hereby dedicate this song to someone, my one and only...

Wang Lee Hom - The One and Only

My sky is so fresh and clean
The clear promise is the air of the past
The person holding my hand is you
But your smile; cannot be clearly seen

Was it because a star changed its heart's preference?
The wishes of the past; have all been thrown away
I can't breathe recently
Even my own shadows; I too want to escape

Baby you're my one and only
The two worlds have all changed shapes; it's not that easy to go back
Assurance; you're my one and only
I say I Love You alone to the phone; I really love you
Baby I cannot love you more than this

Was it because a star changed its heart's preference?
The wishes of the past; have all been thrown away
I can't breathe recently
Even my own shadows; I too want to escape (escape)

Baby you're my one and only
The two worlds have all changed shapes; it's not that easy to go back
Assurance; you're my one and only
I say I Love You alone to the phone; I really love you
Baby I cannot love you more than this

Actually, it has already passed the limit of love

Baby you're my one and only
The two worlds have all changed shapes; it's not that easy to go back
Assurance; you're my one and only
I say I Love You alone to the phone; I really love you

Baby I cannot love you more than this...

I don't even know why am I blogging now. Exam is just around the corner (in one week time) yet I am still in relaxation mode. Here I am, writing nonsense about myself. For God's sake, I should be studying now but something just bothers me. May I ask why must it happen now? Am I not worried about exam? The apparent answer is no. I am worried but then my mind gets distracted and there goes all my attention needed to revise for the upcoming exam.

Life is full of choices. We make up our mind and it is just too difficult for us to turn back and change our decision. Approximately 6 months ago, I went through what I may say the darkest moments of my life. I had no one to turn to, no one to lean on and worse, I lost my sense of direction. That very moment, I thought I learned my lesson. But I guess I was being too naive....

Once a while, you meet people in your life. While some may not have significant effects on your life, others create a whole lot of impact making them far more important that anyone else. Luck could be the only reason that explains why we meet them. For me, I couldn't be more thankful for I meet that someone when I was at the lowest point of my life. Nothing much has changed though. Perhaps fate decided that things weren't suppose to change at all. Anyhow, should I be glad that there was no changes? Frankly, I don't even have an answer myself...

Giving up was never easy. That was why it took me so long to let go in the past. Growing up in a somewhat discriminatory environment taught me that I have got to be tough and resilient and I thought I was tough and resilient. Nonetheless, these past few days proved me wrong. I didn't wanted to give up. I hold true to the saying "never say die". In fact, I have not given up. But giving in? What is giving in? Never have I encounter such words in this matter but who cares anyway. If giving up is gonna be tough, giving in is even tougher I guess.

What is the measure of love? Before that, what is love?, a frequently asked question by those who suffers from unrequited love. How do we measure one's love for another human being? Hmm... to anyone who has the answer, do share with me. If love is to be measured by the wealth you own, then what about those who were married in the kampungs and how do you explain why their marriage lasted so long. If it is to be measured by the things that is sacrificed for him/her, how do you explain love at first sight?

The most important question we have to constantly ask and remind ourself, what was it that made us fell in love with him/her. Smart people give reasons such as, 'oh, she is beautiful', 'she is smart' and lame excuses such as 'she was the one who was attracted to me first'. For those who are drowned in love, they places them above everything else, likened them to god and goddess. Back to the question, I don't even know why I fell in love with her. I guess you don't need a reason to love someone. There is just no reasoning in love... it is just not some math equation.

A statement I have to make here. It was not a competition neither it is now. It doesn't work that way, at least I believe so. There is no winner or loser. She is not the winning trophy. There is no first prize or consolation prize. Enough fighting and comparing. Comparison makes the whole effort seem fake, untrue and dishonest. Conclusion, I am done. I am done fighting, done struggling. Mind you though, this is not the end. Done fighting doesn't mean I gave up. Done struggling doesn't mean I give in.

After much waiting for the never-will-arrive Kawasaki ER6-n, I have given up and continue my search for a used high powered motorcycle. Among the bikes that I have considered includes the Honda CB400SF, Honda Shadow VT600, Honda Magna 750 (I blogged about it before) but never once did it cross my mind that I will "meet" what I would say, one of the rarest bikes in Penang, previously owned by a very nice uncle, the Honda NTV650 Revere.

The Honda NTV650 Revere is the European version of the Honda Hawk GT647 which has now achieve its cult status in the United States. Both bikes uses the same 52 degrees V-twin 600cm3 engine, but it is bored out to achieve 647cm3 and utilizes a single overhead cam with 3 valve per cylinder and features the twin spark ignition. It produces about 50 something horsepower and 56 Newt. The Revere, compared side by side with the Hawk, has a larger fuel tank for better touring capability and a longer rear section. Besides that, it uses the shaft drive which is maintenance free compared to the chain drive of the Hawk, but the Hawk uses a better chassis which is made from aluminum compared to the Revere's steel frame.

On the run, the Revere feels a bit panicky. The front suspension is a wee bit on the soft side, but the rear seems adequate though. Surprisingly, the bike is capable to handle corners much better than you think it can. For your info, the Hawk and the Revere was regarded as a high tech motorcycle back then when it was launched in the late 1980's. It was probably one of the first few bikes back then to use the Honda Pro Am single arm on the rear of the bike. Besides giving it a really nice design for the swing arm and wheels, it also helps in weight reduction and enables the use of the single suspension, better known as Monoshock.

The bike is claimed to achieve the 62 mph sprint in under 4 seconds, but it seems a bit optimistic. Nonetheless, it will achieve 62 mph within the 5 second range. The only complaint that I have about the bike is that it is somewhat under equipped. The meter gauges only shows a speedometer, a tachometer, temperature, high beam, turn signals and neutral gear. It lacks the fuel gauge which is an important feature. The gearbox though claimed by others to be less precise, to me, it is okay but just a bit rough as you can hear the 'klonk' sound when you shift up or down.

So, hmm... why did I suddenly talk a whole lot about the Honda NTV650 Revere? It is because it is my bike now. The uncle has finally agreed to sell it to me, at somewhat a high price many has claimed. Though, dad has bought it for me. Hehehe. I am a happy man now, contented. I can finally say I am a proud owner of a very rare bike in Penang. Hahaha (freaking show off here, mind you, it is an old bike, so nothing to show to people). Alright, done talking. It is time to go back and polish the new member to the collection of bikes at my house now, beginning with the monster muscle bike, dad's Honda CB1300SF, his Honda EX5, my Yamaha Lagenda Z and my Suzuki FX125 cyber sport, THE HONDA NTV650 REVERE.

The same original colour, the same wheels, totally original...

Hahahahaha. Well, I am a different guy. I want all girls to know. Hahahaha again. LOL. My friend posted this in his friendster bulletin and I just have to steal it. Hahaha again. Here are some examples:

We secretly memorize everything you wear. (this is scary, LOL)

Don't tell us to tell you if you look bad. Just... stop. We won't. Ever. Under no circumstances.

Not all guys are afraid of commitment.

Likewise, not all guys want to take advantage of you so please, for the love of god, get over your "I hate men" bitching.

Honestly, we really do think all girls are uglier than you. It's how our brains work. So quit asking.

Sometimes the only things that motivate us to even try at all in school are our wonderful girlfriends.

We say you don't need to dress up for us or wear makeup for us... but we sure would like you too!

We're not kidding when we say we'll trash any guy that looks at you.

Tell us when we smell, please. We can't tell and our guy friends don't realize it.

But please don't smell, we have this concept in our mind that girls are supposed to smell like flowers and sunshine.

When your boyfriend is a nerd, the least you can do is pretend to listen to him when he attempts to tell a funny story about his guild in World of Warcraft, or attempts to explain the physics of a tachyon.

Oh, and nerds really are better lovers.

After reading it, I just can't stop laughing though some are facts, some are truths. Hahahahaha... The laughing continues...

This week is not going to be a very pleasurable week. To start the week with such an issue, it is the last thing any living person would ask for. Well, what goes around comes around. It was easy for me to say back then; to just ignore comments and other's opinion. Back then, I was not the victim. Now, it's a totally different story.

Well, I can't blame others for their curiosity. I, myself did contributed to this problem. Being a loud person, I don't really care if others may hear what I have just said. Nonetheless, this, my friends, is different. This does not only involve me as it also involves another individual. I am not seeking for fame nor am I looking for glory. I pray hard to control myself. I hope I will get through this issue alive. That's if they stop what they are doing now or it's going to be their funeral. The sight of those people, I may not be a big sized guy, I may not be a street fighter but nothing beats a guy whose heart is full of rage. I, myself don't even know what I am capable of... at least when I am angry.

Well, do I sound like the green beast a.k.a the Hulk, "you don't like me when I'm angry?" LOL. Anyway, there is a statement that I have to make. If I can respect you/anyone, I hope for nothing back in return except the same kind/amount of respect given to you/anyone. I would really appreciate it if anyone or any of you guys whom I recognize and acknowledge as friends to ask me personally if you are concerned or have an interest over matters about my life. I don't need free publisity in college (enough popularity, okay?) and I certainly don't need gossips and grapevines flowing around classes. This, I beg of you; if you don't respect me, the least you can do is to respect that other individual.

This, I have to stress. I AM NOT JOKING HERE neither am I making a FOOL out of myself. Don't push it. Don't cross the borderline. Don't exceed the limit. I can tell you, you are this close to making me lose control. That my friend is the limit that you should know. Again, I am asking you nicely to stop all the nonsense you are doing. If you have your personal agenda or if it's just for fun, well read this, "GO GET A LIFE".

Okay, done talking about college and people in college. Now, time to update you guys on my recent fishing trip this past weekend. THREADFIN. I think it's their season this time of the year. A few kilos everyday, for two days. Hehehe. Allow me to show you guys a pic of the biggest threadfin I caught recently. May not be big for you guys, but it is big enough for me. =D

A few kilos. Maybe 12 kilos. Hehehe...


Biggest threadfin for the day, weighing at 600+ grams and 16 inches in length.

I AM ANGRY!
I AM EXTREMELY PISSED OFF!
NO WORDS DESCRIBE MY ANGER NOW.

I JUST WANT A PUNCHING BAG.
GIVE ME A PUNCHING BAG.
someone...
ARGH!!!

I bet you music listeners out there will probably know who Jason Mraz is. Tell me if I'm wrong. But... have you guys heard of Jason Reeves? This guy is so talented. Equally as good as Jason Mraz if not better. The lyrics are just so meaningful and I feel so connected to it. Warning, only suitable for those emo people, like me. Hehehe...

Jason Reeves - Someone Somewhere




Someone is waiting
someone who understands exactly how you feel
exactly how you feel..
someone is dreaming
someone is hoping just that this will be the day
that this will be the day..

that you take your eyes off the ground
out of the blue
and see that someone is looking right
back at you..

maybe that someone's me
maybe it's meant to be
lovers, strangers
sometimes bombs fall quietly..
maybe it's chemistry
maybe it's hard to see that someone is the right one
i hope that someone is me..

nobody's perfect
nobody's perfect no one really knows the truth
all we've got's a point of view..
and there's too many questions
there's too many questions and too many reasons not to try
there's too many reasons not to try..

but you should take your eyes off the ground
out of the blue
and see that someone is looking right
back at you..

- CHORUS -

where ya gonna go from here??
cause everything you need's out there
and you can have it if you dare
if you dare
there's someone somewhere..

- CHORUS -