CK's not so extraordinary life

Please, never say never

2009-06-28T09:48:00.002+08:00

The Fray - Never Say Never

One of the comments posted about this song in songmeanings.net

DistantNFaded [February 7, 2009]

"This is how I see this song, only because of the current situation going on in my life. I think it may be about a girl who is walking out of his life. They have been friends forever, but never became anything more. "Some things we don't talk about, rather do without and just hold a smile" They each have been "falling in and out of love" but either way, they have remained close. But something changed, he wants something more then just that friendship. Maybe she has actually found someone to spend the rest of her life with, even though that other guys isn't right for her and it made him realize. He believes "you can never say never" hoping that they will be together one day. He proceeds to tell her how he feels. He says "picture you're the Queen of everything, far as the eye can see" because she thinks she holds the world in her hands at the moment, but he knows eventually she has to realize that other guy isn't right for her. He continues to say "I will be your guardian when all is crumbling, I'll steady your hand." Meaning, he will always be there for her."

Keri Hilson - Knocks you down (feat Kanye West and Ne-yo)

2009-06-27T10:29:00.002+08:00

William So Yong Kang - A Man Shouldn't Let A Woman Cry

2009-06-25T21:18:00.005+08:00

蘇永康 - 男人不该让女人流泪
William So Yong Kang - Nan Ren Bu Gai Rang Nu Ren Liu Lei

Transformer 2: Revenge of the Fallen [Awesome but not great]

2009-06-24T09:46:00.003+08:00

Transformer 2: Revenge of the Fallen

Yesterday (Jun 23), GSC showed the early screening of one of the most anticipated movies this year, the sequel of Transformer, Transformer 2: Revenge of the Fallen. Well, thanks to my friends for counting me in in their plans, I had the opportunity to watch the movie earlier than its intended screening which is today.

Allow me to give my two-cents about the movie. Overall, I would say the movie is entertaining (plot aside). For those who loves actions and lots of kung fu from robots, this movie is a definite must for you. But behind all those actions and kung fus, the movie doesn't really have much to offer except the hot hot hot Megan Fox, lol.

I have to applaud the director for the start of movie. The chaos in Shanghai, the introduction of a few new autobots, it does make the audiences bite their teeth and keep them in the suspense mode especially the threat uttered by the Decepticon, "the Fallen shall rise again". However, since that, the movie becomes extremely draggy.The bloody annoying mum who whines a lot, the unsignificant dad who adds nothing to the plot (as usual), and the suspicious hot chick that tries to seduce Sam. It is pretty obvious that certain scenes from the suspicious hot chick chasing after Sam and Megan is somewhat an imitation or resembles those from Terminator 3: The Rise of the Machines. And the curious thing is, since when Decepticons can transform and imitate a human, or rather a hot chick.

There is also a lot of unnecessary humor injected into the movie. Examples such as the mum getting high on drugs and starts to crap, Agent Simmons with his line "remember what I did for my country, the country that betrayed me". The middle part of the movie is also rather long in their quest to find the Matrix of Leadership. But soon after they recovered it, the movie starts to get alive again with all those robots fighting one another. The movie also has a few moments of its own where it connects with the audiences emotion such as the fall of the Optimus and the scene where Sam was injured and unconscious.

By all means, I am no movie critic or reviewer. I am just sharing my two-cents about the movie. Out of a rating of 10, it certainly deserves an 8 despite all those shortcomings in the movie. My comments, Like: the action, the thrill and the robots; Dislike: the unnecessary scenes that made the movie too long and that about it. By the way, I love the soundtrack too, Linkin Park's New Divide.

Night at Jerry's condo

2009-06-23T09:35:00.003+08:00

MSN (8.55 PM, June 22) - CK | Who wants to go out and get a few buckets of beers?

MSN (11.30PM, June 22) - CK | Who wants to go out and get a few buckets of beers? | Finally, someone answered my call.

MSN (4.42AM, June 23) - CK | Just reached home. Still bloody awake. I need to go out more often.

Between the night of June 22 and the wee hours of the morning.
An invite to Jerry's condo to have some beer, chit chat and relax.
Simon was kind enough to give me a lift.
Once there, we played games
Ping, pong ... PIANG!!!
Interesting as it is... the game got better once everyone starts to get a lil tipsy.
We have people who ping themselves.
Then the same person again to pong themselves.
And people who piang their neighbors and forget to surrender. (Me included)
All and all, it was damn fun.
As stated through my MSN nick, reached home at 4.42am.
Bathed... and that's it. Went to bed about 5.20am,
the hour mum woke up
She was rather stunt that I was still awake and very fresh. Hahaha...
I wonder if I told her that I just woke up, maybe she would have believed me...
LOL. I'll save that for next time. Slept like a pig and woke up at 8.55am.
Not bad, even if I have a class at 9am
I think I can reach college by 9.20am, hahahaha... (the biggest lie of all)
Took breakfast, blogging now...
and I'll be back in bed in another few more minutes. Hahahaha...

MSN (8.55am, June 23) - CK | Nonsense... I love my bed... I wanna sleep more

Once a year, every year

2009-06-21T15:34:00.009+08:00

What do you call an occasion or event that your family organize once a year, every year? Tradition?

Well, this occasion or event is held within my family once a year usually during the local fruit season every year and has already lasted for generations inherited from my forefathers. If I'm not mistaken or if I'm not making up stories, this tradition originated from Thailand (forgive me if I'm wrong) which may be explained as my forefathers descend from Thailand.

This occasion or event is more like a prayer to a guardian/protector. A few rules/requirements of this prayer is that no pork (and I mean NO PORK!!!, lol) is allowed and fruit offerings of durians, rambutans, mangosteen and cemphedak is a MUST; then there is the nasi kunyit with wonderful chicken curry and pulut with inti (grated coconut cooked with thick black sugar) and those daun rokok (I'm not sure what its called) like the ones people offer to "datuk kong". Well, the concept is similar to prayers to "datuk kong" except that the prayer has to start in the afternoon... say 3.30 pm or so. Something different is that we don't use joss stick but rather candles, red-coloured candles to pray (you can see them in the pics later).

I hope I didn't break any rules for taking pics (sorry if I did). Durians, so many durians. Rambutans, mangosteen and cemphedak. Sadly, I dun take any of those fruits. (Dad, if you're reading this, but that is very unlikely... "you spend so much on durians and eat them like ice-creams, but I don't know how to eat durians and I don't intend to learn. Can you please be fair, and buy some Haagen Daaz or Baskin Robbins next year so I get to eat something too while watching you guys take durians". LOL.

Easily 35 durians overall. Might have cost dad a couple hundreds.
Names like ang heh(red prawn), kay nui jin(egg?) and what "kum poh*"

Mangosteen, cemphedak and rambutans

Right: Nasi kunyit with chicken curry | Left: Pulut inti

Picture during the prayer at granny's house. (notice the candle)

As I blog about this, I wonder if I still get to be with my family to celebrate this event next year. The future lies uncertain, I might be in Aus, probably KL or some other places next year during the fruit season.

"I wanna go out"

2009-06-19T21:53:00.003+08:00

Plurk.com

9.47 pm<> "ck_a_student wants to slack and laze around. TIRED OF EVERYTHING..."

I am very tired of the never ending presentation and assignment. I am very tired thinking about friends leaving Malaysia. I am very tired thinking about what to do next after diploma. I am very tired thinking of which Uni or U/C to join. I just wanna kick back, slack, laze and relax.

I wanna go out. Hang out with friends. Go for outings day or night, it doesn't matter. Venue, not an issue. Be it to the beach, or to clubs. I just wanna spend every remaining time I have in Penang with friends and my diploma course mates. Duration, not a problem. Whole morning, whole night, whole day. 6, 12 or 24 hours. Skip class, not an issue. Money, I will get all the funds I need from Mom. AND FOR ONCE, I am going to hang up my bike key and helmet. I'll drive for a change.

Looking forward to Tuesday (error corrected, Monday is not 23rd). Transformer 2: Revenge of The Fallen at GSC. Wednesday too. Jeff's birthday. Going to be a crazy night. Gonna get drunk and wasted. Hahahaa... Meanwhile, friends ar... plan la... more plans... but count me in okay. LOL. Screw college and exam and assignment and presentation.

The Premier College in Penang... (the story behind it)

2009-06-16T13:28:00.003+08:00

The ABSURDITY in KDU College Penang Campus has just reached its maximum.

Come this June 22, which is about a week or so from now, ALL KDU STUDENTS are required to wear the student card, (okay... they prefer us to call it the "smart cards") ; students are required to wear their smart cards on their body for the purpose of identification due to the recent rise in theft cases in the campus. The reasons they gave to implement such a stupid yet childish method was that to protect of course not only the student's assets and belongings but also those belonging to the college.

So... one would probably wonder why I am so pissed at such move being made compulsory by none other than the head or principal of KDU College Penang campus, Dr Chong Beng Keok. First and foremost, to implement such move will require the involvement of all faculties and schools within the campus. Albeit being able to make it compulsory for the employees of KDU to obey such rules (or they will get the boot if they disobey, personally witnessed such cases before [insubordination]), to think rationally, are they able to make it compulsory to the 3000 students in that campus. (3000 is just a rough estimation). Even though if they manage to make it compulsory, what can they do to make the students obey such idiotic rule. Discipline is another issue but to have students being penalised or even brought to a hearing for not wearing his/her "smartcard" which I prefer to call it the DOG TAG, still wouldn't bring much effect in making students obey. Come on, let us be honest to ourselves. Fellow coursemates and friends who read my blog, I think as teenagers, we are somewhat rebellious and the more "mature" adults want us to do something, we always end up doing the opposite. Hokkien people also have a saying-la, "chiak nui boh chiak theng". Though I'm graduating and leaving the college soon, with my limited ability to forecast, the possibility of the rate of success of this rule being fully implemented and fully obeyed is not zero (due to the KDU employees ma) but will never reach 50%. Well that is just an optimistic projection from a student with limited ability to do a forecast.

Next. How successful can this rule help in curbing the theft cases in campus? Come on, if the rule is not going to be effective in solving this cases or even preventing new cases from happening, why bother wasting time to implement it. Why start something so absurd and soon after not being able to achieve success with it, just shuts the whole thing down and walk off with shame. Well, maybe that is the way KDU College Penang Campus operates (Oops!!!). If the students are required to wear the card, haven't the management or the principal figure out that outsiders can simply duplicate the card. Don't you guys agree? Duh!!! Wearing those smart cards, I wonder if there is going to be anyone who will be bothered to check the card you're wearing, whether the card belongs to you or your friends, or probably you are just a freaking snobbish s.o.b who could be wearing your Platinum AMEX card on your neck (plenty of such people in KDU). And KDU being KDU, the smart card is a business to them whether or not they see it my way. You lose the card, you can't enter the campus until you make a new card. Making a new card of course again cost you money. RM50.00 if I'm not mistaken. (Hey, I don't study Diploma in Business for two years and learnt nothing okay).

I swear I am going to end this rant soon. Just hold on and bear with me okay? Last but not least, did the management or college authorities or even the principal investigate the theft issue and find out the reason of it happening. That again brings me to the next question. WHAT THE HELL IS THE SECURITY PERSONNELS DOING? The purpose of hiring the security personnels (have high regards for them by not calling them guards which is so degrading to their profession) is to maintain order and safety in the campus. Their duty does not only confine to shoo-ing students away for parking their cars in front of the campus. By now you'll be asking yourself, "ya hor, what were the security personnels (guards) doing?" Well, if one sits at the front lobby for 15 minutes, you can witness strangers walking in and out of campus and these security personnels just sit their bumps on the bench provided. Okay, I hope I don't give you guys the impression that I am blaming the guards. I have no such intention at all. I am merely stating that it is within their duty and responsibility in trying to prevent such theft cases from happening INSIDE the campus which they failed, BADLY. So,... why penalise the students for something that they didn't do. Why are we made to wear the smart cards when we have done nothing wrong? To make it clear, I am not against the ruling... I am not sure how other colleges or universities operate. Perhaps they require their students to wear their IDs, but to make it compulsory now that theft cases are happening is such a disgrace to one of the premier colleges in Penang (not being able to catch the thief, we catch the students).

End of my rants for now. More to come this June 22 if I am forced to wear my DOG TAG. Sorry but I have no respect for the smart card or whatsover ID that we have in college. We, or maybe I believe that as adults, individuals we are very mature. Don't tell me or give me reasons such as you have to wear it at your workplace too in the future. I don't buy that. Allow me to apologize here too if I've offended anyone from KDU College Penang Campus, the principal included.

Students graduating, my friends... please make sure that you have completed all your MPW papers. You are required to fill in a form to claim your certificate or something like that. Please make sure you've settled all your payments. That's it. Nothing much to say. The final exam timetable will be uploaded into KCN soon and will be available for viewing at the notice board in front of the Business school. Thank you for your time. Its a pleasure to have my blog as the place where I can rant non-stop. Hahaha...

Like what my friend said
*for every progress that we try to make
we achieved nothing but more regression*

Think about it. Awesome isn't it?

Am I Still The One?

2009-06-15T20:45:00.004+08:00

Its been ages since I checked my mailbox.

At the request of some people, or maybe one person...
I went and click "like" on a friend's status in Facebook.
Fine, guess I was stupid as I received stupid mails from Facebook from doing that as so many people commented on that post.
Well, didn't took me long to delete all those junk mails.
I came across a few mails which are useful.

One from IDP.
One from CY.
One from Su-lyn.
One from Deborah.

IDP sent me a mail about the interview schedule which I haven't decided whether or not to attend.
CY's mail is rather interesting. Still couldn't figure it out. Why don't you help me... 12 or 13...?
Su-lyn's is pure humor. Some unique rendition of the famous and one of my favorite songs of all time, Hotel California by the Eagles. An Indian version called Hotel Kerala-fonia. Though the singer totally butchered the song, the least it could do was to bring a smile to my face and made me laugh for about 2 minutes...? hahhaha...

Deborah's mail was about an invite to join Plurk. It is something something la. Kinda interesting though with the time line and the status shout out. I guess I will not sign up now considering I was kinda stupid to join Netlog not too long ago, maybe 2 years ago which I never bothered to log in at all. LOL.

Another song to share here. Its Daniel Powter - Am I Still The One? And for the record... I am not the missing one or the extra one from the pic above. Hahaha...

A not so good weekend

2009-06-14T20:33:00.003+08:00

Two days of fishing under the very hot sun.
Two unlucky days.
Stupid Saturday, I got stung.
Bad Sunday, a big fish managed to got loose;
and when I say big, I mean big.
Arghhh!!!

Sea condition was very choppy.
Imagine going through road humps on a car with no absorbers...
and the trip lasting for a lil' less than half an hour.
My body is falling apart.
My whole stomach was turned upside down
Organs inside my stomach all fell off their position
LOL...

One thing is for sure.
Explorers are good boats;
and when I say good, I mean really good.
Hahaha...

Boys II Men - End of the Road

2009-06-11T10:01:00.004+08:00

(spoken)
Girl you know we belong together
I have no time for you to be playing
With my heart like this
You'll be mine forever baby, you just see

(verse)
We belong together
And you know that I'm right
Why do you play with my head,
Why do you play with my mind?

Said we'd be forever
Said it'd never die
How could you love me and leave me
And never say good-bye?

Girl I can't sleep at night without holding you tight
Girl, each time I try I just break down and cry
Pain in my head oh I'd rather be dead
Spinning around and around

Chorus:
Although we've come to the end of the road
Still I can't let you go
Its unnatural, you belong to me, I belong to you
Come to the end of the road
Still I can't let you go
Its unnatural, you belong to me, I belong to you

Girl, I know you really love me,
You just don't realize
You've never been there before
Its only your first time

Maybe I'll forgive you, hmm
Maybe you'll try
We should be happy together
Forever, you and I

Girl, you love me again like you loved me before
This time I want you to love me much more
This time instead just come to my bed
And baby just don't let me, don't let me down

Chorus:

(spoken)
Girl I'm here for you
All those times of night when you just hurt me
And just run out with that other fella
Baby I knew about it, I just didn't care
You just don't understand how much I love you do you?
I'm here for you

Im not out to go out and cheat on you all night
Just like you did baby but that's all right
Hey, I love you anyway
And I'm still gonna be here for you till my dying day baby
Right now, I'm just in so much pain baby
Coz you just won't come back to me
Will you? just come back to me

(lonely)
Yes baby my heart is lonely
(lonely)
My heart hurts baby
(lonely)
Yes I feel pain too
Baby please

This time instead just come to my bed
And baby just don't let me go

Chorus:

Chorus (a cappella)

Something... LOL...

2009-06-10T22:14:00.002+08:00

WHAT WAS I THINKING?

WHY DID I DO IT?

IDIOT LA ME....!!!!

ARGHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Strange but true ll

2009-06-09T11:11:00.004+08:00

Another CK's strange but true fact... believe it... or not.

Do you practice what you preach?

Well, I've been thinking a lot lately. I've been thinking of where I was 2 years ago, where I am today and where I might be in the future. I've been thinking of what I was doing 2 years ago, what I am doing today and what I am going to do in the future. I've been thinking a lot of who I was 2 years ago, who I am today and who I am going to be in the future. Then all these question brings me to one very funny question. What did I do best in the past 2 years?

Hmm... what did I do best in the past 2 years? If there one thing I do best at college and at home, its talking. Hahaha. Laugh all you want but seriously, that is the one thing that I do best. Talk and talk, preach and preach. I talk some sense but most of the time, I talk nonsense. I talk about what is right and what is wrong. I talk about the pros and the cons. I talk and talk and talk, I am just like a broken record that continues non-stop. Okay, all these leads me to another question.

Do I practice what I talk? Do I practice what I preach? A lil' embarrassed, the answer is No. I don't practice what I talk nor what I preach all the time. Sometimes, the principles in life that we hold so dearly to seems to limit what you can and cannot do. But that is another the issue. The issue is that I have to constantly remind myself to talk less and probably I'll embarrass myself less. At the end of the day, no matter how good you are in talking... we have to consider the burden. The weight carried by those who suffer is always heavier than the weight carried by those who talk.

Here we go again, and you see I am talking non-stop again. Well, long story short. All I trying to say is walk the talk. Don't talk a lot (like me) and let all the words and principles go down the drain. Strange but true. Have you asked yourself if you ever did something which contradicts with what you talk or preach? Hmm... isn't it like always. Hahaha... We always rationalize our actions to make it deemed fit to what we talk.

Strange but true

2009-06-08T21:43:00.002+08:00

There are many facts in our lives. Some of the facts are just undeniable, unquestionable. Some are just plain truth. But this one is different. Its strange. But then, what is stranger that the human mind. The human mind and brain is the strangest and most complex subject in this planet. What do you have to say about this fact?

Most of the time, we make those who care for us cry.
On the other hand,

we often cry for those who won't and never will care for us.
Worse still...
The ones we care about are those that won't and never will cry for us.

Hmm... what do you think? Sounds like what you're going through now?
Well this is CK... strange but true... believe it... or not.. hahahaa...

First Cantonese Song in my blog

2009-06-07T21:03:00.002+08:00

As I've posted earlier, I have a sudden fondness to Cantonese songs. So... considering that this is the end of the week, I just wanna share an emo? maybe not? not sure Cantonese song with you guys. Its by Gigi Leung. The title is ... errr ... po' bu' de` yi or... the meaning in english is having no recourse? I am not sure la. You go check out the song.

Assignments...

2009-06-06T17:01:00.004+08:00

Been really busy these few days...

Assignments... presentations... they just keep on coming. It's as if they are never ending. LOL.

Didn't have a good sleep for days now. It's been like 2 maybe 3 nights of rolling on the bed, staring at the ceiling blankly and that continues for hours before I can actually fall to sleep.

Been on a downloading spree. Downloaded 4 albums in just one night. Just had that sudden fondness to Cantonese songs. For your info, the 4 albums downloaded are all works of Gigi Leung. Hmm... always know she is an actress but didn't know that she can sing pretty well too.

Okayla... that's it. Can't talk much, back to the assignments.

Did both idiots just pranked me???

2009-06-02T20:15:00.004+08:00

The most embarrassing event struck me this morning. Arghhh!!!

Alright, I head down to college at about 10 am to get a lecturer's cellphone number for one of my friends who is in Singapore now. Everything went smoothly; I got the cellphone number and as I was heading back to my bike (I walked through the cafeteria), I met two of my previous lecturers. For your info, they are not from the Business School. You should have an idea which department they are from.

Alright, part two. I swear to God there was no one behind me. There was some people using their laptop facing outwards to Le' Cafe. The lecturers were taking a break and as I was walking, both the lecturer was waving their hands. Initially, I thought it wasn't me. Fine. I ignored them. Then they continued to wave towards me. I felt really weird. Walk towards them and as walk towards them, they were smiling at me. Fine. I ask them, did you waved at me? " No, I was waving at another guy..."

Hmm... now I really look like a fool. Thank god there was no one at the cafeteria and even if there was a few students, they were minding their own business. I was rather pissed off. I should have just walked away. Arghhh!!! I think they were playing a prank on me. Idiotic lecturers. Anyway, I shall get over it. Misunderstanding. Miscommunication. LOL.

After that incident, I head down to Pulau Tikus and went to IDP. Seek some advice and opinion from them. Well, for a non-fussy guy like me who has no freaking idea of which Uni he wants to go to, it totally mess things up. The consultant recommended a few Unis, a few ... which is about FIVE. LOL. Curtin, Adelaide, Tasmania, South Australia and Queensland(techno). Now that is a really broad option. I don't care where I end up as long as the degree is good and preferably I can get a scholarship or some sort of a discount on my tuition fee.

Well, the consultant did made a point, it doesn't really matter much which Uni I choose (since based upon her observation I'd fit in well in any of those Unis), its just a matter of finding the Uni that fits me perfectly. Haiz, headache. I am back to square one, where I started 2 years four months ago. At the end of the meeting, I went back home with loads of thick brochures. Madness, I think I might just drop the idea of heading overseas for my degree. The idea seems so sweet, so tempting... but then its such a hassle. I might just forget about it, and I'd be lucky if I get to reach KL. LOL.

Anyway... that's it for now. Until I update on my future, my bleak future... this is CK who was totally embarrassed by this morning's incident. Chao...

James Blunt - Tears and Rain

2009-06-01T16:28:00.003+08:00

James Blunt - Tears and Rain

How I wish I could surrender my soul
Shed the clothes that become my skin
See the liar that burns within my needing
How I wish I'd chosen darkness from cold
How I wish I had screamed out loud
Instead I've found no meaning

I guess it's time I run far, far away; find comfort in pain
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble
Hides my true shape, like Dorian Gray
I've heard what they say, but I'm not here for trouble
It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain

How I wish I could walk through the doors of my mind
Hold memory close at hand
Help me understand the years
How I wish I could choose between Heaven and Hell
How I wish I would save my soul
I'm so cold from fear

I guess it's time I run far, far away; find comfort in pain
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble
Hides my true shape, like Dorian Gray
I've heard what they say, but I'm not here for trouble
Far, far away; find comfort in pain
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble
It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain

Just another weekend

2009-05-31T20:07:00.002+08:00

Tired.

Fishing trip to Pantai Kerachut.
Sadly, the catch isn't that good.
Reach home at 6.55pm... was damn hungry,
Took dinner and here I am blogging.

One particular incident happened today.
Made me reminisce about the past.
Years ago, when I was a kid...
You owe me the respect that I deserve
But it seems like you'll never give it to me...
Even up till today, I am who I was years ago,... a kid.

Call me rude, I won't disagree...
If you can throw insinuations at me, and I can take it...
I see no reasons why you can't take a few from me.
Again, call me rude... but I won't disagree.

Its the end of another week.
Here is a song for everyone to cool down, and just rest their mind.
Its The Show by Lenka.

Yes

2009-05-28T20:35:00.002+08:00

Yes.

There is nothing I wouldn't do for you,
But there is really nothing that I can do.
Perhaps I'll never get over you
So I'll wait, for there is nothing left for me to do.

Yes.

I wish you'll understand me.
I beg you'll never hate me.
I pray you'll never let go of me.
I hope you'll never allow yourself to get over me.

Yes.

I know my odds of getting there.
Fighting the fate that confines me
I pray and hope that I'll be there
For there is nowhere I'd rather be.

If only I could find a more fitting song to embed together with this post, it has to be Jewel - Leaving on a jet plane.

What about me?

2009-05-26T20:34:00.002+08:00

You have found your love for a way of life.
She on the other hand found love for a place.
What about me? I have yet to found anything in life.

What should I do next?
Where will I be in 3 months time?
How will I feel there?
Who is there to guide me?
When is all these going to end?

That aside...
I've been receiving messages from someone.
Someone who calls him/herself, my friend.
But sadly "my friend", I don't know who are you?
Would you at least kindly give me a name?
and gender, (I am not gay, I am straight).

Friends who read my blog.
Your help and assistance is needed.
If, any of you know this person
using the cellphone number;
012-4762687
Please inform me.
I would really want to meet this "friend".
Thank you.

Joseph Rudyard Kipling, If

2009-05-25T18:15:00.002+08:00

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
but make allowance for their doubting too,

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating
And yet not look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - but not make dreams your master,
If you can think - but not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;

If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build them up with worn-out tools

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on, when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on!”

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings, yet not lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much,

If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run
Yours is the Earth and everything in it,
And, what is more, you’ll be a Man, my son!

Joseph Rudyard Kipling

What is gonna make you happy? Ever thought of that?

2009-05-23T19:37:00.002+08:00

My 100th post.

I am going to ask myself this question
The question is directed to all of you too

Are you happy?

What is gonna make you happy?

Is it how you look?
or the car you drive?
the people you know?
could it be money?
popularity? fame?
power? accomplishments?

Well, am I happy?
No.
I have all those things and I don't feel its enough.

Well then, what is gonna make me happy?
I think its love.
Love for someone else,
could be for a place or
a way of life of even for a family;

But how I find it;
where I found it
its all up to me.
And the same goes out to all of you.

The past 6 months,
has been the toughest period for me;
I don't know what to do, where to go
Perhaps its time for me to face the fact
Time to seek my true calling.

(The questions I posted were taken from
OTH S05E01, Brooke Davis)

It's been 3 weeks

2009-05-22T10:10:00.005+08:00

This is not my 100th post. Its one short... its the 99th post.

Well, I've been blogging about my stupid lame life for quite sometime now, for about 6 months and I do really wonder if anyone does drop by to visit. LOL.

Anyway, for my 99th post, it is going to somewhat similar to my very first post in this blog. I wouldn't say that I got drunk last night for I didn't vomit. I would rather say I was very high. Very very high indeed but I soldiered on and yes, I survived. It has been quite sometime since I drank that much, be it liquor or beer.

It was a night full of indirect slander and jokes, but we shrugged that aside for we are brothers (I am the youngest) . A night full of card games and dares coupled with challenges, never knew you could have so much fun with playing cards. It continued until 3 something in the morning. Soon, they dropped me back home and I slept at about 4 in the morning.

Well, everyone pretty much had their own agenda and problem. Some were there merely just to have fun. Some were burdened with family problem. I, I was deeply troubled by my own problem. Last night, or should I say yesterday marks more than 3 weeks since the "Errr???Huh???" post and I kept to my promise and only one friend knows what was the promise all about. Well, after last night...

I woke up at 8:30 in the morning. I am still pretty sleepy. The "sensation" from last night is somewhat still there. I am still pretty much dizzy. LOL. I got to go now to get more sleep... chao...

First encounter

2009-05-19T13:08:00.002+08:00

I am going to be dramatic.

God took away my eyesight when I was in Standard 1. I could still remember the day, I was called by the Ministry of Health officials and directed to go to the General Hospital. Being a kid back then it was scary, but what was scarier was the jokes, the pranks they played on you. Well I survived that. Its the past now.

People who invented contact lenses gave me back my eyesight today. The feeling of having a true and clear vision without the help of spectacles, glasses was so high. It was almost like my dream came true, to eliminate one of my greatest weakness. I thank those who invented contact lenses.

I'm very happy today. Despite getting to only wear the lenses for only 4 hours today, have to take them out in another 3 hours, I am happy. I am glad finally I had a chance to try on contact lenses. Well, maybe falling into the sea and to lose my specs is a blessing in disguise.

By the way, for those of you who joked that I will dig my eyes out, sorry to disappoint you. Haha. I managed to put the lenses in within 3 minutes. Taking out wasn't that difficult either. Hehehe...

U2

2009-05-18T11:04:00.003+08:00

Is it getting better
Or do you feel the same
Will it make it easier on you
Now you got someone to blame

You say
One love
One life
When it's one need
In the night
It's one love
We get to share it
It leaves you baby
If you don't care for it

Did I disappoint you?
Or leave a bad taste in your mouth?
You act like you never had love
And you want me to go without

Well it's too late
Tonight
To drag the past out
Into the light
We're one
But we're not the same
We get to carry each other
Carry each other
One

Have you come here for forgiveness
Have you come to raise the dead
Have you come here to play Jesus
To the lepers in your head
Did I ask too much
More than a lot
You gave me nothing
Now it's all I got
We're one
But we're not the same
We hurt each other
Then we do it again

You say
Love is a temple
Love a higher law
Love is a temple
Love the higher law
You ask me to enter
But then you make me crawl
And I can't be holding on
To what you got
When all you got is hurt

One love
One blood
One life
You got to do what you should

One life
With each other
Sisters
Brothers

One life
But we're not the same
We get to carry each other
Carry each other

CK is blind

2009-05-17T19:55:00.002+08:00

Haizzz...

I am back but not in perfect immaculate condition. Mind you first, there could be typo errors in this post. I lost my specs. How did I lose it? The stupid CK saw a cuttlefish swimming beside the boat, reached out his hand and tried to grab it but he caught no cuttlefish; instead he fell into the sea. Blooommm, CK fell, next moment he got up back into the boat and there goes the specs.

What next? Got scolded lo. RM500 dropped into the sea. There goes my first specs with Nikon lenses. Back home, got lectured lo. To worsen the situation, I have no spare specs. How are? Blind lo. I am blind now.

Considering that I am blind now, was wondering... if there are anyone who is willing to lend me their eyes for a few days? Hahaha... Okay okay, just be my eyes for a few days, don't have to lend me. LOL...

Boring Saturday

2009-05-16T20:03:00.007+08:00

A day full of motoring...

It was a pretty boring day. Weather was fine and decided maybe I should have one those solo ride all around Penang Island again. Set out at about 10:30 am. Areas covered, Batu Feringgi > Teluk Bahang > Pantai Acheh > Teluk Kumbar > Batu Maung > Jelutong > Fort Cornwallis > Gurney Drive > Tanjung Bungah reaching home at 12:30 noon; A trip which I believe to be about 100 kilometres. The fun, undescribable. The thrill, out of this world.

Top speed I managed to reach on the highway along the coastal line, 150km/h. Fastest speed around the bends in those scary roads after Teluk Bahang dam, 80km/h. Roads discovered, roads that I use less than 3 times a year, 50 kilometres. Don't mind the scorching sun, the dust, the insects... verdict: Penang is one beautiful state. There is something special about it.

Anyway, I love the bike, I love the sound it makes, the way it handles. Its old and its aging, but I'm proud to say that it is still my bike and I love every bits of it.

Back home, took lunch, bathed and went for an afternoon nap. Woke up at 4:30pm. Decided that since I've nothing to do, might as well just visit Top Gear UK's website and watch the videos posted. Jeremy Clarkson is an arse but he is one great person, and he has one of the greatest job on earth. Richard Hammond is one funny guy and yes he is entertaining. James May is also funny, but he's funny because he is somewhat retard.

Challenges, a trip of almost 800 miles on a full tank of gasoline. Trips to the US to test the muscle cars. Comparisons between the Evo X FQ360 against the Sti WRX. Track laps by the Stig. Best of all, Top Gear in Vietnam where they had to travel from South Vietnam to North Vietnam, convert their vehicles into amphibious vehicle to reach a floating bar.

All and all, its a day full of motoring. Tomorrow, tomorrow could be a day full of fishing. Hehehe... that's it for now. Bye...

Jordin Sparks - Battlefield

2009-05-16T15:10:00.001+08:00

Jordin Sparks is back. This is her new single, Battlefield.

Coldplay - Life in Technicolor ii (HD)

2009-05-15T19:47:00.002+08:00

Hahaha... what better ways to just kick back and relax after an exhausting mid term exam than to watch this creative video (a must watch) and listen to the music. I couldn't stop laughing after watching it... LOL

Retard-ism (mid terms)

2009-05-15T12:46:00.004+08:00

Exam exam exam...

AE3's exam was retarded. So is the lecturer. In fact, there is nothing which is not retarded in that class.

International Business exam was not so retarded but still retarded. Why on earth must the MCQ questions be so difficult? Luckily, the lecturer is not retarded. Her tips are accurate minus ethnocentrism. LOL.

But nothing beats Malaysian Economics. Malaysian economics is the most retarded of all. The lecturer Parthiban S. Gopal is in fact the most retard lecturer in KDU business department. The notes are damn effing retard. So are the exam questions, retard.

I have better pass, preferably score in this midterms. Or else, I swear to God I'll tear down the college and murder all the lecturers in business school. Hahaha... the KDU massacre.

After The Hurricane

2009-05-08T21:11:00.003+08:00

Just another song to share by Jazmine or Jasmine Sullivan. Its After The Hurricane from her album titled Fearless. Well, I think this is a really really nice song, and she sang it very well too. No hidden meanings here, just love the tune of the song.

What a Great day... (arghhhh!!!)

2009-05-07T19:30:00.002+08:00

What a lucky day today?

What a better way to start your morning by taking the good old Malaysian's favorite breakfast, the nasi lemak. The rice is cooked to perfection with coconut milk taken with the delicious spicy anchovies gravy on top served with banana leaves. Hmm... yummy. Well, that is what I thought too... until this morning. I vow that I'll never ever take nasi lemak for breakfast again.

Why? I was surfing the internet this morning when I took my breakfast and thank god I was eating very very slowly. I had finished almost half of the nasi lemak when I pushed the anchovies aside and found worms. WORMS. ARGHHH!!! That totally disgusted me. I immediately rush to the toilet, shove two fingers down my throat and bluak all of it. Hahahaha...

Okay that was a "pretty good" way to start the day. Next, after dinner... on the way back to the car... I stepped on dog poo. Arghhh!!! DOG POO... Sigh... I had to go clean my shoe and hop back to the car on one foot. Ish!!! What a lucky day...

Alright. A song to share. Its by Taylor Swift, Cold As You.

Gabrielle, out of reach

2009-05-03T18:08:00.002+08:00

One more song for this week. Its Gabrielle from UK with Out of Reach.

Interested to know the meaning of the song? Well check out this link here below.

http://www.songmeanings.net/songs/view/52243/

F17 to the rescue... CK and dad to the rescue... LOL

2009-05-02T21:42:00.003+08:00

The sea breeze was blowing lightly, the sky was drizzling, the sea was calm... we went out fishing at about 3 p.m today. No luck with fishing using rods and hand lines, we finally gave up and head back to shore to get some nets. Next, we caught some prawns, a few catfish and with the sun setting down at about 7 p.m, it was about time we head back. Reaching the beach, there were a few people who started to yell at us. Hmm...

There is a guy who is stranded in the middle of the sea. He was out wind-surfing but as the winds were too "gentle" coupled by strong currents, he drifted far away and is unable to head back to shore. So, it's up for us to the rescue. Hehehe. We had to find the guy before it gets too dark.

The White Boat has suddenly become the rescue ranger boat. Hahaha... With the newly upgraded Suzuki DT30 outboard motor, we found the guy in no time. He was drifting helplessly on his surf board. Pheww... the look on his face when he saw us. Ehh... we are not suppose to laugh at the misfortune of others. We pull him up into our boat, drag the wind surf and the board up and slowly headed back to shore. At last, everyone is safe and happy. Hehehe...

Wow... helping others really feels good. I can't imagine what I'll do if I'm in his position. Apparently, he went out on a canoe to rescue a female rookie surfer. He allowed the lady to actually canoe back while he will try to surf back. However, the rescuer ends up being rescued by us. Okay... I am gonna refrain myself from laughing again. We should not laugh at the misfortune of others. Hahaha...

Anyway, in this life, you reap what you sow. I went out for dinner at this place in Batu Feringgi. After dinner, we were waiting for our receipt and out of nowhere, the cashier was shouting and yelling at me. Then from nowhere, a guy came and push me away. Hmm... the guy actually saved my life. There was a big CENTIPEDE, or in malay LIPAN, which is EXTREMELY poisonous underneath the table. It was about 9 maybe 10 inches long. Geez... scared me to hell. They then killed that "thing" which almost killed me. Hooray!!! Everyone is safe and happy again.

Morale from this, do good unto others and maybe God might pity you. Hahaha... in Malay, buat baik berpada-pada, buat jahat jangan sekali.

Err??? Huh??? part 2

2009-04-30T18:22:00.004+08:00

Finally, CK has managed to snap out of his dream world. At last, after months, he finally realize that he has got to face the fact and move on with life. In this life, we can never get what we always want and what we always demand. If there one way a man can be successful in life, he has to be cold-hearted, persistent and never changes his plan. I, have made a plan for myself and I intent to stick to it. :)

I was recently tagged by a friend in Facebook. I was required to post 25 random facts, truth or statements. Hmm... easy? No... it is not easy. A few statements that I came up with are...

6. Keep your options open, but set your priorities straight.
22. It's not always about the outcome. The process is equally as important as well.
23. The last thing you wanna mess with in this world is not an angry bull, but a jealous woman.

Okay. Anyone who doesn't agree with me can begin to spam my chat box on your right now. Hahaha...

Like I have said, I have made plans for myself and to kick start that plan... why don't all of us stand up (take that lazy bump off the chair), and start laughing and dancing to this video from Youtube, Hippo and bully.

Errr??? huh???

2009-04-29T11:09:00.003+08:00

I am not sure of what's happening. I don't know what's got in to you. Somehow, if its my fault, then give me the opportunity to apologize. I didn't mean it. And come on, you know you can tell me anything.You know you can count on me...

Elliot Yamin is back

2009-04-28T21:42:00.002+08:00

This is Elliot Yamin's new song titled Fight for Love which I think is going to be chart topping. Remember his song titled Wait for You. Hmm... the new one ain't losing to the old one. Hehehe

Looking for the place where love and feeling good don't ever cost a thing

2009-04-27T20:31:00.007+08:00

I am not sure if I am emo or not, but there is feeling, this emotion that surrounds me now. I can't find words to describe it, I can't find examples to show it... all I know is I feel it. A simple click on a link... brings you this video which presents such a great talent and brings you back to 2 years ago, the time when you made one of the biggest mistakes in life.

Looking at a few of my schoolmates, and the time they spent at Disted College, it made me realize that I am such an introvert. I notice that I have lost the time I can't never recover... with the semester and my diploma ending soon, I regretted I join KDU. Maybe it's just me, and not all my coursemates. Somehow, I feel angry with myself at times for being someone so dull, so unexpressive; someone who never knew how to enjoy teenage life like a teenager... a person who is always serious and never know when to have fun.

I have to compliment this girl; this girl that I don't even know. I have to give praise to her talent with her skills in playing piano and singing. To be honest, she might just land herself a contract with a recording studio. The video her friend made to go along with her song, I salute that too. It was perfectly matching.

I don't own this video but I did spent like 30 minutes to do it. Its certainly not my property. I am just trying to share with you guys what true talent is. Info from friends said that this girl is of the same age as me. The emotion put into when she sang the song... I am sorry, but I have got to steal it somehow. You judge her singing.

CK can't stop hahaha... -ing and hehehe...-ing

2009-04-26T19:14:00.003+08:00

Yet another weekend...

Another typical CK type of weekend, where he wakes up early at 6:30 am on a Sunday (crazy), takes breakfast early and head out to sea early to mess with the fishes. Haha. Yupz... it is those kinda weekends... those that I spend at least 10 hours out in the sea fishing and netting.

Anyway, it would have been a waste if its not those typical weekends. Imagine this... 8 kilos of threadfins, 1.5 kilos of mackerels and one really big white promfet. Hehehe... CK is grinning... So you'd probably wonder what we are going to do with those fishes. Hmm... what more can we do except to sell them off. Hahaha... and what does that mean to CK? Extra pocket money, more allowance la... hahaha (aiyoh, why you so slow eh) Hehehehe...

That is today. A happy day... What about yesterday? Happy day also la. Why? Hmm... nothing beats the feeling of having clean your own car or bike yourself. Yupz... I spend almost half a day cleaning up my Honda Revere. I was thinking I shouldn't be that lazy. If I could stay up all night cleaning people's mess, I see no reason why I can't spend a few hours cleaning up my bike. From the headlights until the wheels... the look of the shiny fuel tank and the sport wheels; it just brings upon a feeling of satisfaction. Riding the bike after you've cleaned also feels different. You feel proud mer of course... hahaha... what a cool and shiny bike... hahaha...

Lastly... to end this week... I am shouting out... "I'm a BIG fan of Kate Voegele", LOL. I don't know why... but I just love her songs. From You Can't Break a Broken Heart until Only Fooling Myself, and the recent single, Angel.

That's it. Enjoy the song... hehehehe... hahahaha...

Tire blues (CK is crazy, LOL)

2009-04-24T10:50:00.006+08:00

At last I found you...

Finally, after months of searching, surveying... stupid phone calls to as far as Alor Setar... idiotic jargons, visits to motorcycle spare part shops from Tanjung Bunga all the way to those in Butterworth... I finally found where I could get the Maxxis tire. LOL... hahahaha. It is in Bukit Jambul.

However, I am facing a dilemma now. Should I get the Maxxis? It's not gonna cost me an arm and a leg. Its probably RM140 maybe 150, (the shop claims RM120, which I doubt). But then again, should I wait until at least the Duro is worn out first? That is gonna have me waiting for what, maybe another year since I only ride to college and back. I have this urge in me to swap for the Maxxis, I can't wait that long. Or... maybe... I can sell off the Duro? Which is pretty much what I am thinking about now. Hehehe...

Duro HF918 (110/70-17>54H) up for sale. Just give me a reasonable price, as long as you're not asking it for free (haha, cost me 160 when I fixed it), I will take it out and sell it to you. It is quite a good tire, I wouldn't consider to swap it for the Maxxis if it was in the right size. Sigh... I'm probably crazy. Who would want to buy a second hand tire? The shops doesn't want it. The mechanics doesn't want it.

After much consideration, I still can't make up my mind. The evil side of me might win. I might just swap for the Maxxis and where would the Duro end up, most likely in the store room for display, LOL. I don't know. Should I just waste money? Will the Maxxis offer more traction and grip both on dry and wet conditions? There are too many questions... I am a very technical crazy guy. Who knows what I'll do... We will find out next week if I actually swap for the Maxxis...

Will it be money well spent or money wasted?
Better performance? According to the specs, yea...
110/80-17 (PERFECT SIZE)
57 (Perfect weight rating)
V (Exceeds my requirement of H)

Songs and more songs...

2009-04-21T19:04:00.005+08:00

CK is back again... but the flu is still not away...

Arghhh... the flu is so stubborn... or maybe I am. Hahaha... for refusing to take any medicine, LOL.

Anyway I am here to post the song of the week. Maybe there're two songs, maybe three... could be four. To get things started, its Kris Allen, the guy from American Idol 8 with Falling Slowly.

Next is a soundtrack from the movie Chasing Liberty. Its Life Will Go On by Chris Isaak.

The third song is also from Chasing Liberty, its Caroline Lost with To Be With You.

Last but not least, its India.Arie with He Heals Me.

Flu is killing me...

2009-04-18T16:40:00.002+08:00

The weather these days are extremely hot.

My complaint is that I have fallen sick again. Flu. Its killing me. I can't breathe properly. I can't talk properly, my voice is very hoarse. I am very sleepy. Constantly, tears are running down my eyes... as if I am crying. When is all these gonna end???

Fun.

Yes, I hereby express my hatred towards power products from Yamaha Corporation. I don't know why, I hate their motorcycles. I don't really like their outboard motors. It has been twice that Yamaha outboards has failed me. I was almost stranded due to a misfiring engine previously with the Yamaha 15hp, and recently, the used Yamaha Enduro 30 also failed to leave a good impression.

I love Suzuki. From their motorcycles such as the great King of Four Stroke Mopeds, the FX125 until the Suzuki outboard such as the previously owned Suzuki 15hp and the new Suzuki DT30. The reliability they offer is unmatched. The power is addictive. Our Explorer F17 is now fitted with twice the horsepower. Yea... been out to sea for 3 days consecutively to test the engine, and hell yea I am loving every bits of it.

That's it for now until I provide an update for Sunday's trip to Pantai Kerachut. For now, it is CK blogging here with flu that is kiling him...

Regrets often arrive too late...

2009-04-14T13:45:00.004+08:00

Professional Preparation Training

Hell yea I am enjoying Professional Preparation Training. What a great class. What a great lecturer to begin with, Mr Mark Stephan Felix. Informational, fun, entertaining, it's all what a great lecture should be. It is such a big loss to those who had to suffer PPT under Ms Lim. LOL.

Anger + Frustration

To be frank, I am extremely angry and frustrated now. The Malaysian Economics presentation is due tomorrow. My group, which was suppose to complete and hand in their parts to me for compilation on Sunday evening (a dateline which we all agreed on) unfortunately has yet to do so even up to today and to be precise, now. It takes up so much anger from me to utter such words. I REGRET. It is up till my last semester that I have to deal with this. I REGRET.

My greatest regret. I failed to see the reason behind it. I thought I was doing the right thing but the fact is the moment I made that choice, I had committed a mistake. I was proven wrong the following week. Sighs of exhaustion... its too much for me to handle. I should have joined... but I thought that a change is probably what I'll need for the final semester. Fact is, I don't need it. I don't want it. 'Don't fix what's not broken'... Damage is done. There is nothing I can do about it. I will just have to live on with this regret...

Finally, a phone call from Kelly Services. I've got work again. It was a torture. First time I had to work overtime until 9 pm. Bloody hell... all my energy was totally drained out of it. But who had ever said working is easy? LOL... CK shall hang on... Money is a motivator now. Hmm... something extra, a drained out CK... proves to be not so drained but rechargeable. Wonder how? A 15 minutes chat. (Maybe what drained CK out was not the work, but ... )

Guys and girls out there, it is not that difficult to show someone you care. Show concern while you still can, while you're still allowed to do so. Regrets often arrive too late and too little can be done about it.

Final statement of this post; Sometimes, the words that people write proves to have more meanings. Why? They are written because they are not said. The author probably chooses not to say it, could be that the author couldn't find the best way to say it... or probably the author couldn't find the courage to say it.

Physical pain ... but it ain't half as pain as ...

2009-04-12T18:57:00.002+08:00

Pain pain pain...

I have got serious sunburn. Argghhh... now if you ask me is fishing fun, I will say NO, lol. I have got sunburn on my arms, my neck, my back and legs. To worsen it, I accidentally step on a piece of glass or probably sea shell and that has made a huge cut on my toe. I have got cut wounds all over my hands, my fingers. I am extremely exhausted, carrying two sets of nets. Topping that I had to carry the engine. Pushing the boat up and down the beach, my arms feel so tired it is as if they are disconnected from my torso. I sound so worn out eh? I am that worn out.

The catch today isn't as good as yesterday. Sigh... suddenly all the fishermen's boat feel a lot faster than our F17 Explorer. Hmm... so not satisfied. But they shall pay. Ohh... overtake us la. WAIT. Wait till we fit the Yamaha 30HP. We shall see who is faster. Hmmpph... hahaha... sound so kiddish.

Song of the week, Pink's new song titled Please Don't Leave Me. It is not that the song is that nice ... I just love the official music video. CUTE... hahaha...

I miss you. I really do.

2009-04-11T19:12:00.006+08:00

Hmm... there is nothing much that I can say about my life now. If you ask me for one word that best describe my life now, I would have to say "lonely". I don't know why or the reason that makes me feel this way. All I know is that I start to feel the emptiness, taste the loneliness and and see all the blankness that surrounds my life. Arghh, I sound like someone who is so not right in the head, suffering from depression. LOL.

At this very moment, I really miss someone. I really do. Its amazing how you can keep on thinking of the same person everywhere you go. My friend, who suffers an almost similar situation once told me, staying will bring no one any goodness but then leaving is the last thing you want. To stay or to leave? I think my mind betray myself. It has already gave me an answer with those constant thoughts of you.

Hahahaha... surprisingly the application in facebook is not all that fake. I was using this horoscope application and its says that Saturday is my lucky day and indeed it is. I went fishing. And yea... I caught fishes... heheheh... Here are the pics...

Yay... grouper. Exactly 600g.

Grouper and threadfins... wonderful... but then again
SUNBURN...

I shall go fishing again tomorrow.
Meanwhile, I am eagerly waiting for the Yamaha 30hp. Yupz... UPGRADE. Dad is getting the Yamaha 30hp Enduro. Yay again... twice the horsepower of the tiny Suzuki motor, hehehe...

A great deal of fun, and sunburn... wahaha...

2009-04-06T19:49:00.003+08:00

Wooo... had a great weekend...

I thought he was joking when he said he wanted to bring me to Pulau Bidan. I thought he was just saying it for the sake of saying it, just to excite me. Who'll ever thought he is for real. I mean come on, its just a 17 footer Explorer and a tiny 15HP Suzuki outboard motor. Well, he did bring me there. We did reach there. Its pretty amazing how such a small "perahu" actually crossed from Penang to Kedah. Well I always envy my friends that they get to go for vacations overseas, but I think it's okay la. I get to go to places few have been to, and exploring island by island with freedom.

1 hour and 20 minutes. That is how long it took us to reach there. 1st island, the Pulau Bidan. 12 minutes later, the 2nd island, Pulau Telur. Then there was Pulau Song Song and Pulau Bunting if I am not mistaken. The water there is crystal clear, I even saw a school of mackarel swimming, passing underneath our boat. Wah... fun, fun, fun...

Fishing. I have to say I am kinda disappointed. Sigh... the fishes there is so tiny. Barely reaching the size of 2.5 inch. But then there was plenty of fishes and we practice "catch and release". Fishing tiny fishes just for the fun of fishing.

The trip back from the islands to Penang was a whole lot faster. 50 minutes was all it took for us to reach Pulau Tikus, which is just 5 minutes away from the place where we park our boat. We had a great deal of fun, steering the boat all the way to the island and back... Waking up at 6:30 am, out to sea the whole day, Back home at 6:00 pm. 2 hours plus of boat ride to and fro. RM40 of petrol (tiny Suzuki is very frugal). April the 5th, a day to remember.

(Too bad I don't have a camera; my phone camera is not up for the job but I promise that I will save up, get a decent camera and take pictures the next trip there) =D

What Hurts the Most

2009-04-04T09:09:00.006+08:00

I am loving every bit of this song, the music video and the story behind the song. Rascal Flatts - What Hurts the Most. I have had this song for quite sometime now, playing it once in a blue moon but all that is different now after Mr. Danny Gokey made a cover of that song in American Idol top 9 performances. In my honest opinion, one has really got to feel the song in order to sing it well. Although Rascal Flatts made the song popular, I think Mr. Danny Gokey made the song meant something considering his past (his wife passing away). Anyway, check the music video out.

The story behind the song is that there is this couple who is deeply in love with one another. As you may see in the video, there was a sense of doubt in the guy, asking the girl "what's wrong, is it your dad?" However, this girl as we may assume is so madly in love with this guy, as she asked him back... "do you ever think about the future?" and the guy said "YOU". Well that is really touching but there was a secret that was untold (my guess) that the girl was pregnant. The sad thing that happened was that the guy was involved in a crash and passed away. The girl is obviously devastated that the father to her unborn child has passed away. Anyhow, you watch the video yourself and have your own say.

Rascal Flatts - What Hurts the Most

My Car Still Stinks!!!

2009-04-02T19:34:00.006+08:00

MY CAR STILL STINKS!!!

Arghhh... I am this close to snapping. My dad sings to me, my mum sings to me, my bro sings to me... arghh... there is nothing I can do except to arghhhh!!!!

I have tried everything suggested through the net. I have got the cushion cleaned by a car wash centre. I have sprayed Febreze like no one ever did. I used charcoal. I used vinegar. I bought car fresheners. I am going to use pandan leaves. Basically, I dismantle the whole rear of the car seats and place them under extreme heat, the sunlight all to no avail. The car still stinks. Sigh... anyone has any good, useable solution, please tell me. Please. Okay, don't suggest Dettol. I don't like the smell of Dettols. LOL.

Malaysian Economics

DAMN, the class is boring. Hell, WE WANT MS. HELEN BACK. Sigh, I hate KDU for assigning Mr. Parthiban to lecture for Malaysian Economics. By all means, that being said doesn't mean that he is a lousy lecturer. He is in fact too passionate. Guess how long did it took him to ask his first question. 45 MINUTES. He needs 45 minutes before he asked his first question, and that the students are still not familiar with him and I am sure he doesn't know the students too. Haihz... hang on hang on... 3 maybe 4 more months.

International Business

Ms. Leow is back. She is back and it seems she is a very very happy mother of a very healthy cute lil' baby girl. Good. But how's the lecture? Err... Ms. Leow will always be Ms. Leow and still is Ms. Leow. That said, its okay la. Guess I will survive pass through this subject. Hehehe...

Picture of the biggest swamp crab I ever caught. Hahaha... suppose to upload this pic long time ago but then didn't had the chance to until now. As wide as a 1.5 litre water bottle. Now that is huge...

The swamp crab's shell versus a normal flower crab's shell

Tired

2009-03-31T11:53:00.003+08:00

Sunday (March 29,2009)

Travelled to Bukit Tambun, Simpang Ampat, Jawi, Sungai Udang, a Kuala which I don't know of the name, Tanjung Piandang. I was almost semi-paralysed sitting in the car for hours. Damn tired. Went to bed early. Did not update about song of the week.

Monday (March 30,2009)

First day of college. First lecture is Academic English 3 by Ms. Evelyn. Sadly she is not going to be with us for the whole semester. Surprisingly her hobby is fishing. Fishing wor? I can't believe my eyes when I saw her nails, so nicely done and polished. I don't believe her interest is fishing, despite her claim that she is from what Kelab Pemancing or whatsoever... kekekeke...

Back from college and I am off to work. Symphony BCSIS under Kelly Services. A new system, a new method of handling the cheques. Off from work and straight back home, before attending Joanne's b'day party.

Midnight, between Mon and Tue

At Sunset with a bunch of friends. Took a bottle or two of Heineken. There goes that ban of mine, the promise. Gotta restart all over again. That includes ciggs. Ish!!! A friend of mine went crazy, starts puking all over the place. Sad? Stress? I wonder what's the cause? Sigh...

CAR CLEANING. 2am - 5am. Hell I am tired. Both physically and mentally. Just so you know, whatever I did may be wrong, may be way off the line, too much... but I will never explain my actions. I don't have to.

Tuesday (March 31,2009)
Happy birthday Joanne. Off to car wash centre at 7:30 am. Meanwhile at college anticipating Professional Preparation Training from Mr. Mark, too bad its cancelled. The module is beginning next week. Here I am stuck in college, while the car is getting cleaned. Sigh... Suppose to go for baskin robbins today, guess no more.

Songs of the previous week (Update this week)

Tracks of My Tears (live) - Adam Lambert, American Idol Season 8
To Make You Feel My Love - Kris Allen, American Idol Season 8

Ain't about how fast I get there, Ain't about what's waiting on the other side

2009-03-27T18:07:00.002+08:00

Woooooohoooooo ..... yeayyyyy... yeayyyyy.... wahahaha... hahaha...

Haaa.... you guys probably think that CK has lost his mind, gone mad... become crazy... run amok but the fact is, it surpasses all that. It exceeds all those thoughts you have. Simply put it, what I feel now, how I feel now... is TOTALLY crazy but it is just too difficult to put it in words. I couldn't have been more delighted than I am, now that I know that despite screwing in my previous Org. Behavior final exam, I could still score well.

Man, getting an A for this subject means the world to me. I have to confess, I totally gave up, lowered my expectation to reduce the frustation and disappointment... but this is really... its just like God is giving me a second chance. Seriously, and until now, I still couldn't believe it. Well, I gotta say thanks to all those friends who was with me that day, when I was freaking down and emo (lol), and I definitely have to thank her, the one who confirmed me that everything was going to be okay.

Going through all these, I think learnt a thing or two. I have to be a lil more humble, stay a low profile and definitely help and assist more people. Don't be over-confident and know my limits. Perhaps this incident serves as a warning and a sign for me to change. I must change... I already changed but its going to take more time.

I have a song here to dedicate to everyone, myself included. Not really a fan of Miley Cyrus, but this song really caught my attention. Really inspiring. Very meaningful song.

2009-03-23T09:26:00.009+08:00

Hey... hey... hey... I think my luck has changed. Hehehe... I think my luck is getting better lately. You must have wonder why I am saying this out of a sudden. Hmm... I went fishing again yesterday and damn it was fun. Let the pics do the talking.

Grouper. One aerola grouper and one orange spotted grouper.
"Koay Kao"
Snapper. One golden snapper. "Ang cho"
Catfish. Locally known as "toh-sat"
Marbled stargazer. Locally known as "hor hu"
Croaker. Locally known as "sam-ge"

Woke up at 6am. Out to sea at 7am. No breakfast, no lunch. Back home at 6pm. Tired? Yes... Fun... Definitely.

******* *******

Song of the week: Journey - Open Arms

Lying beside you, here in the dark, feeling your heart beat with mine
Softly you whisper, you're so sincere, how could our love be so blind
We sailed on together, we drifted apart, and here you are by my side

Chorus:
So now I come to you with open arms, nothing to hide, believe what I say
So here I am with open arms, hoping you'll see what your love means to me
Open arms

Living without you, living alone, this empty house seems to cold
Wanting to hold you, wanting you near, how much I wanted you home

But now that you've come back, turned night into day, I need you to stay

Chorus

Arghh!!!

2009-03-20T18:03:00.004+08:00

Arghh... I am angry. Why? Again... why? What the hell the wrong with God? Why does He wants to fool me every single time. I couldn't have been more embarrassed than today. It is always like that, failing on me when things matters most. Stupid propeller bush. Why must you koink on me? Anyway, I rather cancel the plan than risking anyone's safety. Rather be embarrassed than to being non-rational. Its over. That's it.

Fixed. Tomorrow, I'm going again. Everyone seems to have fishing madness recently. My buddy Simon was freaking lucky he caught a grouper that day. Well, he shaved his hair bald. Maybe I should do the same thing. Shave my head bald. Be botak. Hmm... I wonder how will I look like if I am botak. LOL. Hahaha...

Well, I am really down today. Sad. Emo. Suppose to be a fun-filled day but then again, we plan, God decide. Argh!!!.... just can't stop argh!!!

Top 5 in my list

2009-03-14T10:46:00.004+08:00

Hmm... it's Saturday. The end of another week, the first Saturday after the disastrous college semester. Anyway, here I am sitting doing nothing, I was thinking that if I could make a list of motorcycles that I love and dream of owning one. This is what I came out with...

1. Honda NR750 (92)
Reason: Come on man, the only road-going bike in this world that uses OVAL pistons. On top of that 8 valves per chamber with a total of 32 valves on a compact V-4 750cc engine. Carbon fiber fittings all over the bike. Once, the most expensive road-going bike with limited production. Truly a dream come true if I can own one. Hehehe... =)

2. Honda VTR250 (09)
Reason: The first bike that I fell in love with. My recent addiction. I just wish Honda Malaysia can bring this model in. Hell I believe the sales figure will top that ugly looking Ninja 250. Trellis frame just looks beautiful. If I were in Honda's R&D, I would immediately request a project for a VTR400 or 600. Starting getting bored of CB400's and inline-fours. V-twin is the way to go.

3. Honda NSR250SP (93-94)
Reason: Boy-racer bike. Light weight, plenty of madness power for a 250 and hell yeah, Andy Lau rode one before in Full Throttle.

4. Triumph Bonneville T100 [50th anniversary] (2009)
Reason: It just brings back the memories. The sound of that parallel twin. Doop, doop, doop, doop. The styling... effing retro. Hit the road with an open face helmet and a leather jacket, damn cool. Maybe it just apply to me, hehehe =)

5. Triumph Street Triple (2009)
Reason: Its 3 cylinder engine. Very quirky styling, street fighter with dual headlamp. Fit this with a set of Jardine, hit the straights at illegal speed and you sound like an F1 car.

There you have it. Top 5 in my list. Nothing above a litre. An exotic V-Four, two entry level V-twin, one parallel twin that brings back the memories and one freaking awesome jet sounding Inline-Three.

That's it. Now, song of the week. A local artiste, James Baum. Title of the song, Locked in Love.

First solo ride around the beautiful Penang Island

2009-03-13T21:49:00.005+08:00

Whoa... I have to say I finally realize that I am such a pain in the ass. Well, all this while I do notice that I am someone who loves to brag, show off and deviate from norms. On top of that, at times I am someone whom you would call as "damage", that is that I make myself feel superior through the inferiority and misfortune of others. And yesterday, I learned my biggest lesson in life. My pros are actually the cons that break and tear me apart. SELF CONFIDENCE. That is why they say we should always practice moderation, too little and you are bullied, too much and you are dickhead.

As I have planned, I wanted to go on a solo bike trip around Penang island and yes I did it. Man i tell you, it is that fun. The best thing about riding a bike is that even though you don't have a destination to reach, you continue riding until you reach a dead end, you make a turn back, and continue to ride... until the next dead end, make another turn... and you just eat up the miles, reaching places you never reached, discover things you never did and seeing things you never thought seeing. Riding across those quiet winding roads, passing through those peaceful sub-urb, you just clears off all the shits and nonsense that is in your head. The road, the rider and the machine. The vibes, the sound, I gonna start talking mumbo-jumbo here, its really amazing how you just bond with the machine you ride. Its really difficult to put it in words. You just gotta experience it to know it.

Do check this link out, http://motorcycledaily.com/10march09_sharp&soft.htm

Studies shows that riding motorcycles can sharpen your brain. There is also a link to a very fascinating book (I want one of this too), Steven L. Thompson's fascinating book, Bodies in Motion, which tries to discover why some people are predisposed to riding motorcycles and some are not. Anyway guys, dump those 4 wheels and start turning on the ignition, kicking those starters (or press "start" them) and ride to work (or to school or college). Hehehe.

Review: My recently fitted rear tire, the Bridgestone Battlax BT45r actually outperforms my expectation. Okay, I have been riding the bike for a couple of months now, and I have to say, this tire really did change the bike a little if not a lot compared to the previous Michelin. The tire does inspire confidence in the rider even during some wet and uneven surfaces, the bike was still manageable. Hmm... the front Duro tire, the HF918, was surprisingly not that bad. Okay, it did scare me a lil', pushed too hard and the manoeuvres just gets messy. But overall, it is not bad, considering its price.

I think I rode pretty aggressive today, considering I tackled a few bends at triple digit speeds, above 100km/h (damn high), raced with some Mat rempits on mopeds(jeez they are fast) and hit the straights at illegal speeds. Hahaha... I am still alive. Well, CK is still alive to see the sun rise tomorrow and hopefully... CK will change his personality; to be a better man.

Fuck My Life...

2009-03-12T17:41:00.002+08:00

I am so angry with myself. I am so pissed at God. Why me? Why? What's your problem??? Why do you have to fool me this way? Its not as if everything was smooth sailing lately. I just couldn't stop blaming myself. And Bloody hell, why now? Why do this to me when things matter to me most?

If there is anything left for me to do now, it's to fuck my life. Why? Why was I born with this disability? I was I born with this flaw in me. I am nice to everyone, at least I think I am. Again, could it be ego? If it is, then I will just take my own life. Woohoo... I am yet again another statistic for Malaysian's who have ever thought of committing suicide. I so not contented. I feel that it is so FUCKING not worth it. Argh!!!!!

I will never ever forgive myself. But Hell I swear, I really thought I saw another word. I really do. Why prank me??? Going through life's hardest lesson... it will take time before I heal.

Mary J. Blige - Be Without You

2009-03-08T16:11:00.003+08:00

I LOVE AMERICAN IDOL!!!

Geez... I am crazy, hahaha... Sigh, exam is just a few more days and I am here shouting "I LOVE AMERICAN IDOL". Hmm... AI is very very exciting and interesting this year. TOP13, what the hell? Hahaha...

Hmm... I've got to thank American Idol contestant, Lil' Rounds for if it's not for her, I wouldn't know of this song. Be Without You by Mary J. Blige. This is the song of the week. I just can't stop repeating the song through winamp. Haha. This lyrics of this song is to be viewed with a positive mind.

Mary J. Blige - Be Without You (Live 2007 Grammy's)

Mary J. Blige - Be Without You (with lyrics)

You'll never know what life throws at you

2009-03-05T19:10:00.003+08:00

Hmm... weird feeling, weird emotion clouding the atmosphere. How difficult it is for me to put in words and explain it to you guys, hell I think there are no words to describe this weird emotion. At last, all my assignments and presentations are over. The semester is coming to an end. Its amazing how time flies... day after day, months after months... years after years. Its going to be tough for me, but I think I will survive. I have finally understand and that is all thanks to watching 2 great movies recently, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button and The Notebook. Life, as how we see it, is measured in moments and not in hours or minutes.

People come and go but only few leaves an impact in our lives. Joining KDU on March 26 2007, I came in a stranger but who'd have ever imagine that I will leave this college with a lot of friends. Who'd have imagine that an enemy would be one of my best friend now? Who'd have imagine that her friend would end up as someone special in my life? You'll never know what life throws at you. They are surprises, God's gift to you.

I think there's nothing much I want to add in here. It's common and known to all that every meeting ends with some parting. Before any of my friends from Jan 07 semester leave, I have to apologize to you guys if I had offended any of you at any time. I don't think I meant to say those words or do those things.

Ending this post with a message to someone. I've kept my heart in a chest. The key to open the chest is with you. You can unlock the chest at any time, or you can ignore it. It is just another way of saying that I will wait for you. Why am I saying it now? I think we always appreaciate and realize the value when we are in the verge of losing something or someone. It is my fault at the beginning, it is still mine at the end. I wish to fix it. I hope time and fate allow me to fix it. Until that day comes, CK who is living his not so extraordinary life... shall wait patiently but hopefully not foolishly for her...

*praying hard*

The end of another week...

2009-03-01T17:04:00.005+08:00

First and foremost, I need help. I NEED HELP. Does anyone know where I can get a front tyre for my motorcycle? Haiya, I know it's in the motorcycle sparepart shop la. Problem is, sigh... they don't sell the size that I want and they are not willing to special order it for me. Stupid shop. Why can't they just order it for me? Anyway, the size that I need, 110/80-17 with a load rating of 57 or above and speed rating of H and above. Anyone... please help me find this tyre. I seriously need this. 110/70 just wouldn't do it, the load rating is just too low... about 40+ pounds off the standards. Any brand will do (except Duro, Cheng Sin, Kenda), preferably Maxxis M6002, Dunlop GT501, Bridgestone BT39.

Second, I don't know why I feel so worn out lately. Hmm... the sleeping disorder is long gone. I sleep well everynight, 8 hours a day but I still feel tired. Is stress having an effect on me? Well, I think I was being rather honest when I said that I have a 65-70% of stress in life. Money, money and money. Work, work and work. Argh... luckily I am able to handle stress well or I would have committed suicide long time ago. Hahaha... not really la... just joking.

Third, I wonder why is everyone so sad. Hmm... I know the semester is going to over soon, (one more week) and I know a lot of people are leaving but why should we be sad? Well, for me... my sad days are all over(could be true, could be a lie). I know certain memories are just too sweet, but come on, your friends gotta live their lives too. We should happy for them. For some people, stop being sad la, considering that you get to go to Australia for your degree. You eff-ing worry too much about your relatives who is going to be there. Do you wanna know what I think, if one has a determination... nothing can stop him/her. If you wanna rebel and have fun, I believe nothing can stop you. THEY ARE NOT GONNA TORTURE OR KILL YOU IF YOU DO. LOL.

Lastly, the song of the week to end this post. I know this is a rather sad song. But be positive.

I translated the lyrics for those banana's like me. Well, it cost me 15 or so minutes with the help of an online translation dictionary. Hehehe...

Frequently blame myself for initially I shouldn’t have
Frequently regret for I didn’t make you stay behind
What was the reason, we’re obviously in love
But finally we still have to be separated
Was it that we always kept to ourselves?

X2
Who’d have imagined meeting you again in a crowd?
Fate was determined as such, leaving us with no choice
These couple years passed on moderately
It was as if there was a person missing
But I gradually understand
That you are still my concern

How much love can start over?
How many people are willing to wait?
We return only when we appreciate
But not knowing that love, whether it still exist
How much love can start over?
How many people is worth waiting?
When love already vicissitudes
I’m not sure if I still have the courage to love

CK suka cari pasal...

2009-02-25T22:06:00.003+08:00

I had a presentation today. It's for the subject of Data and Computer Communication. Hmm... it went on pretty well; I mean my group presented quite well. Anyway, I think I owe my group members an apology for being a control and power freak... taking control of the presentation most of the time. Sorry. Guess I was too much, am always pursuing perfection.

I submit to my defeat. My group presented quite well but it was not the best. There was another group who did better than us but I think I am satisfied and contented with our achievement. Hmm... some people was posing a lot of questions to me, I admit I was panic but I managed to conceal it. Hehehe... But I respect her. She was taking charge of her group, leading them pretty well... a girl full of caliber I should say.

Fate. Hahaha... that is why they say, "mess with the best, die like the rest". I did not show any interest on any of the presentation presented today except one. I did not pose any question to any group except one. Hmm... why that one group? Mix with the wrong person, and sad to say you are going to be affected as well. To the last group, to 4 ladies... no hard feelings but I wasn't going against you guys. Its just one girl there. Hmm... Hahahaha... She did nothing, she didn't step on my tail, she just... haiya, she deserves it. Mind you, I can be silent as a lamb in a presentation, but once I open up my mouth and start posing questions, I will make sure that you are unable to answer it. Full stop.

2 more weeks before the end of a semester and what a semester it is. Had lots of fun, learned lots of things,... definitely lots of conflicts... but nothing beats the joy of doing well for the subjects. I hope I am able to maintain my academic performance... need to achieve a 4.0 this sem. I must and I will... wish me luck

Keri Hilson - Energy

2009-02-22T16:41:00.003+08:00

Keri Hilson's song by the title of "Energy" tops my list for this week. This is the song for the week. Enjoy.

Toothache made me blog about this... hahaha...

2009-02-17T21:28:00.004+08:00

CK, the one who has it all but nothing at all. Judging by my first line, you'd probably guess it out that this is going to be yet another emo post by CK. Well, you guessed right. To be honest, I shouldn't be at home, online and blogging now. I was suppose to be out with a group of my friends. The initial plan was to get ourselves a bottle of liquor and probably get drunk before midnight. LOL. Anyway, I think you'd know by now that I didn't follow them. I confess, I wanted to go and I actually drove to college(how often do I drive), and I actually brought along my chillbox inside the trunk but a split second was all it took for me to change my mind.

So what was it that actually change my mind? Why did I change my mind? I don't think I would want to answer the questions here. All I can say is, I may "seem" happy at times, but I am definitely not near happy at all. Why did I laughed and joked about that matter? You'd probably mistaken me and thought that I feel that it was fun. Well, it's not fun to me. I thought that it would have created at least the slightest provocation but sad to say, I am wrong yet again. You were neutral maybe positive and happy. Hmm... I am out of words, I don't know what to say anymore.

CK, the one who has it all yet none to share with. Do you know what I feel? Well, the best things in life are free and the best things in life are definitely meant to be shared. I mean come on, you can't live a life being so self-centred and stingy. Back to me. I have a house to stay in, I have a car to drive, I have 3 motorcycles and I am definitely not in debt. I have sufficient cash to sustain my expenses, sufficient attention from my family members and definitely all the unnecessary attention I get from college. Wait. Something is not right. Something is missing from this ideal, close to perfect picture. What is it that I don't have? What is missing from my life? Geez... I am a very complicated guy. Blogging about something so deep, something a typical 20 years old teenager would never understand or thought of. Guess what, I am a weirdo.

Sigh, sigh, sigh... that is what I can do. I showed my interest, I place forward my intention... and what is the last thing that I would expect from you is a cool treatment. Whoa... is there a need? I have done nothing wrong okay. It's starting to get really really weird. Anyhow, I choose to ignore it. Typical CK, the great pretender... did anything happened? NO. If your response is negative, I would understand and respect you. No worries here. But seriously, one question that I don't even have the answer to. How sure are you things wouldn't work out? I am not sure myself that things will work out. God knows...

Sorry to say this to someone.
If what my friend told me is true,
If what we guessed prove to be genuine,
Then sorry is all I can say to you.
I don't know what is it that you see in me but whatever it is,
I do hope that the other two sees it.
If there's one whom I am so crazy about, its the other.
If there's one whom I so not over with, its another.
I am not perfect.
I fail to see that...
I may be choosing, but so are others.
I may make people as options but me myself is an option.
If there is one advice that I could still remember from one of my true friends...

"DON'T PRIORITIZE THOSE WHO TREATS YOU AS AN OPTION"

Happy Valentine's Day...

2009-02-14T19:48:00.003+08:00

Hey guys... what day is today...? Well, it's Valentine's day. LOL. Sad to say this, but to all singles on Valentine's day out there, it is the end of the world lo.... hahahaha... Just joking. Nah, all hopes are not lost yet. No point rushing into a relationship if there is not gonna be any outcome. Take your time, an advice for myself too...

So the song the week and today being Valentine's day, it has got to be a love song la... hahaha. Not an emo song. The title is "I finally found someone" by Bryan Adams and Barbra Streisand. This song goes out to all the happy couples enjoying candlelight dinner as I blog now. Happy Valentine's day everyone.

I finally found someone, who knocks me off my feet,
I finally found the one, who makes me feel complete.

It started over coffee,
We started off as friends,
Its funny how from simple things,
The best things begin.

This time its different, (nah nah nah nah)
Its all because of you, (nah nah nah nah)
Its better than its ever been,
Cause we can talk it through...

My favorite line,
Was can i call you sometime?
Its all you had to say,
To take my breath away.

Chorus:

This is it,
Oh i finally found someone,
Someone to share my life, i finally found the one,
To be with everynight
Cause whatever i do, its just got to be you
My life has just begun, i finally found someone

Did i keep you waiting? i didn't mind.
I apologize. Baby thats fine.
I will wait forever just to know you were mine.
You know i love your hair, are you sure it looks right?
I love what you wear, isnt it too tight?
Your exceptional, i cant wait for the rest of my life...

Repeat Chorus

Cause whatever i do, its just got to be you
Oh my life has just begun...i finally found...someone.

Like a moth to a flame

2009-02-12T22:05:00.003+08:00

Exam week has come and gone. Pass or fail, the verdict is still yet to be known. I for one will wait anxiously to know what my result is. I am interested to know how well (or how bad) I did for the exam. For the meantime, I shall be optimistic...

Tiring...

Exam week. Yet again, I am shown the bad side of human. This time, I saw how self centered and stingy one can be. Maybe I am on the demanding side instead of the providing side. A change of roles? Could be. I don't know. All I know is that its been continuous for 38 hours since I last slept. Why? Don't and never ask why. I don't know.

Sigh...

Like a moth to a flame, thus hath the candle sing'd the moath. I am irresistibly and dangerously attracted to something or someone.

Argh!!!!!

Chinese song again...

2009-02-07T11:10:00.002+08:00

This song reflects on my life in college. My story can't be more accurately told except listening to this song and understanding its lyrics.

xiang yong yi bei latte ba ni guan zui
Felt like making you drunk with a cup of latte
hao rang ni neng duo ai wo yi dian
To make you love me a bit more
an lian de zi wei
The taste of unrequited love
ni bu dong zhe zhong gan jue
You won’t understand this feeling
zao you ren pei de ni yong yuan bu hui
From the beginning there’s already someone with you
kan jian ni he ta zai wo mian qian
Seeing you and him in front of me
zheng ming wo de ai zhi shi yu mei
Proved that my love is only ignorant
ni bu dong wo de na xie qiao cui
You don’t understand my sorrow
shi ni yong yuan bu ceng guo de ti hui
It’s something you will never experience
wei ni fu chu na zhong shang xin ni yong yuan bu liao jie
The pain that I go through for you you’ll never understand
wo you he ku mian qiang zi ji ai shang ni de yi qie
Why should I force myself to love everything about you
ni you hen hen bi tui wo de fang bei
While you persistently compel my defence
jing jing guan shang men lai mo shu wo de lei
Silently counting my own tears behind closed doors
ming zhi dao rang ni li kai ta de shi jie bu ke neng hui
I actually knew that making you leave his world would be impossible
wo hai sha sha deng dao qi ji chu xian de na yi tian
But I am still waiting foolishly for a miracle to appear one day
zhi dao na yi tian ni hui fa xian
Until that day you’ll realize
zhen zheng ai ni de ren du zi shou zhe shang bei
The one who really loved you suffered alone

kan jian ni he ta zai wo mian qian
Seeing you and him in front of me
zheng ming wo de ai zhi shi yu mei
Proved that my love is only ignorant
ni bu dong wo de na xie qiao cui
You don’t understand my sorrow
shi ni yong yuan bu ceng guo de ti hui
It’s something you will never experience
ming zhi dao rang ni li kai ta de shi jie bu ke neng hui
I actually knew that making you leave his world would be impossible
wo hai sha sha deng dao qi ji chu xian de na yi tian
But I am still waiting foolishly for a miracle to appear one day
zhi dao na yi tian ni hui fa xian
Until that day you’ll realize
zhen zheng ai ni de ren du zi shou zhe shang bei
The one who really loved you suffered alone
ceng jing wo yi wei wo zi ji hui hou hui
I thought I would regret
bu xiang ai de tai duo chi xin jue dui
Don’t wanna love too deep,surely infatuated
wei ni luo di yi di lei
The first tear that fell for you
wei ni zuo ren he gai bian
The changes in myself that are made for you
ye huan bu hui ni dui wo de jian jue
Can’t call back your firmness towards me

wei ni fu chu na zhong shang xin ni yong yuan bu liao jie
The pain that I go through for you you’ll never understand
wo you he ku mian qiang zi ji ai shang ni de yi qie
Why should I force myself to love everything about you
ni you hen hen bi tui wo de fang bei
While you persistently compel my defence
jing jing guan shang men lai mo shu wo de lei
Silently counting my own tears behind closed doors
ming zhi dao rang ni li kai ta de shi jie bu ke neng hui
I actually knew that making you leave his world would be impossible
wo hai sha sha deng dao qi ji chu xian de na yi tian
But I am still waiting foolishly for a miracle to appear one day
zhi dao na yi tian ni hui fa xian
Until that day you’ll realize
zhen zheng ai ni de ren du zi shou zhe shang bei
The one who really loved you suffered alone
zhi dao na yi tian ni hui fa xian
Until that day you’ll realize
zhen zheng ai ni de ren du zi shou zhe shang bei
The one who really loved you suffered alone

Cry On My Shoulder by Deutschland sucht den Superstar

2009-02-06T23:10:00.005+08:00

I just learnt the best lesson in life that I think I won't forget for the rest of my life. What is the most dangerous and sabotaging thing that you can do to yourself? You'll probably think cutting your own wrist, drinking poison or maybe just dash out into the middle of a busy street. Guess what? You're wrong. The most dangerous and sabotaging thing you can do to yourself is being curious and you start to ask the question "why". Now I understand the reason why people refuses to ask questions even if they don't know, even if they are left in the dark. I think they feel that it is best to be left in the dark. Sometimes, asking the question "why" gives you the ugliest, hard to swallow fact that you either can't face or choose to avoid.

Well, how does it feel like to give up even before you try? At least if you tried, you tasted the bitterness ... then you give up. And now, being slap with facts... you are left with no options but to either forget trying or fail in trying. Well, I think I've had enough. Enough failures in life. I am not sure if I can take another blow. I will just blame it on luck, fate and TIMING. Exactly like those words mentioned in the lyrics from the song by Whitney Houston and George Michael, "If you think that we'll lose what we have, Then I'd just rather stay (rather stay) the same". The gamble is just too big for me. As usual, I am in over my head.

Just so you know, if I had chosen to proceed trying... I wouldn't at all mind sacrificing my all for you. I don't care what it takes; let's keep it short and simple... I will try my best and persevere to gain your love at all cost. But knowing what the result might be, knowing how you would respond and react, it just scares me to think of all these. I don't want my sacrifices to be worthless. Enough. All this time, my efforts just go un-notice. Enough. I can't take it anymore. Here, if you knew that no matter how hard you try, how bad you want it to happen... you'll just end up being that small unsignificant guy in her heart... then would you even try? Would you even bother to try? I think I have been stupid countless of times; I am a good guy... but I am just not that noble or stupid to try.

A new song for this week. Its performed by DSDS (Deutschland sucht den Superstar). The title of the song, Cry On My Shoulder. At first, this song was suppose to be dedicated to her. What irony... I will just self dedicate this to myself. I think I will need it more than she does.

Madness struck me

2009-02-05T23:29:00.003+08:00

If you start to suspect or feel that the feelings or affections for you has started to fade, then I just have to be cruel and say its faded. Well, feelings and affections... if its from me, it just doesn't fade that easily. I forced it to fade. I have said it and I am saying it again, I have just got to be cruel. I LOVE you too much... I just can't lose you... But I don't want to be the one who begins to weep and cry. I don't wanna be stupid. I can't wait for reality to struck me in the face then only I wake up. I have to wake up now. Sooner or later, I have to. Why now? TIME. It takes time. How? Its not easy and I don't even know how. I'm praying that it will just be over soon. Nevertheless, you will always have that special place in my heart and don't you ever doubt that. If I had the chance, I won't do this. This is not me. This is not CK. I wish I have the chance yet sad to say, I am under privileged. It's not something which I asked for, it is just my life... my fate... that I won't be able to fly. I am happy you are flying. The future that lies ahead of you... nothing is worth for you to look back and reminisce about the past. Well, I wish you luck. Guess I just not good enough for you... You just deserve better. I hope you can understand me. I am not a normal typical guy. For God's sake, I wasn't born with a good memory and being observant of fine specific details for nothing. If its for something, its for remembering you probably for the rest of my life, not forgetting those times we spent together even though we were just friends. Anyway, why am I even writing this. I am just being stupid again.

Something else. I am not doing anything but I know that even if I try, all my efforts will just go un-notice. Who am I? I am nobody. I would trade my life for something else if I could. Forgive me God for being so discontented with my life. I just can't help it. I always chasing after something that I won't reach. I am always in over my head. Hell, I am always emo.

My friend just mentioned something to me. She was somehow facing a similar problem. She asked me, why is it that the ones I want doesn't come to me but the ones I never thought of came to me? I couldn't answer her for I am facing the same situation. Now I ask you guys. Does anyone has an answer?

Well, I guess that's it. I am feeling much better now after blasting it all out. Perhaps I should just move on with life without thinking much. Sigh... how easy is that if you can't shake off something that was with you, in you for quite sometime. Someone has just got to listen to Whitney Houston and George Michael - If I Told You That.

(if I told you that) I wanted to see you
(and if I told you that) I beg to please you
(if I told you that) Ill always keep you
What would you say (if I told you that)

Now tell me how you feel if I told
You that I had feelings for you
And would it be so wrong to say
Whats on my mind
I'm sorry I have to
We were friends but with time
What I feel inside for you has changed
But Id give up on love, if I thought
That it was untrue for you

(if I told you that) I wanted to see you
(and if I told you that) I beg to please you
(if I told you that) Ill always keep you
What would you say (if I told you that)

I know that we were just friends
But what if I decide to bring somethings in
I hope it wont offend the trust
We have cause I dont want this to end
I you think that well lose what we have
Then Id just rather stay (rather stay) the same
(Id rather stay the same)
Cause I dont wanna choose
Between two of the most precious things to me
(tell me)

(if I told you that) I wanted to see you
(and if I told you that) I beg to please you
(if I told you that) Ill always keep you
What would you say (if I told you that)

If we take this chance and extend
To each other romance
I hope it would be
The right thing for you and me

(if I told you that) I wanted to see you
(and if I told you that) I beg to please you
(if I told you that) Ill always keep you
What would you say (if I told you that)

Would you be there for me
Could you dare to hold me
Will my feelings leave me
Lonely if I told you

The story of A, Z, X and CK...

2009-02-05T13:45:00.003+08:00

I think I know human well. Yet, I have not seen the best... or the worst a human can be. Sounds familiar to you? Well, I have said this once and I am saying it again but there is a reason behind it. Last night, I encounter another scenario where I just don't understand guys or even girls. Human, they are the toughest subject one can study in this planet. I wonder what shapes them to act in such a way and not the other, which seems to me to be more preferable. Why oh why? Maybe I am just different from them since I am the only one who feels that way.

Coming back to the story, last night... I received a call from a friend asking me out to Coffee Island. Hmm... I was kinda (maybe I was) tired but yet I didn't know what made me agreed to go out late at night. Maybe she mentioned that someone was there, and the moment I heard that particular person's name, I just say YES. I don't know... I'm saying its maybe... so it could be... or probably it is. So reaching there, I went to another table first. In fact, I didn't really joined the people who asked me out. I was actually sitting with my other group of friends. And there is where the story begins...

We have this one guy, who thinks he knows it all and yet he never succeed. Let us call him A. Then we have this naive girl, who seems mature but she is not even close to that stage at all. Let us call her Z. Then we have the superstar, a guy who thinks that he is good and the fact is, he is good. He is X. You'd probably wonder what is X good in. Well, he is definitely good in something which I am a total noob. You go figure that out.

So they were playing cards and after awhile we got bored. Then we begin chatting. Interesting topic, me. How I fail? Why I fail? What should I do? and all those typical stuff one will advice his friend when it comes to matters concerning chasing after girls. Hmm... well, certain things they said is true. I can't never doubt nor judge that. It is a fact. Certain things that they suggested to me, that... I can do it but I just choose not to do it. At least I feel I am human not doing it. Come on, what X said was pretty clear-cut. It is all the girl's decision. You can chase after her, flood her with gifts and money, stick with her 24/7, sms and phone calls 24/7... but if she doesn't choose you, it means she doesn't choose you and that's it. Full stop...

The following scenario was the thing that caught my attention and interest. X. X receives a phone call. He receives a phone call from his girlfriend or female friend, that I am not too sure. So, first thing he said when he picked up the call was "hami ... .. .. ". The call continues. He provoked her asking her if she was sleeping with someone else. Call continues. Sigh... All the words uttered to the girl on the other side of the phone call was just unpleasant to the ear. And the fact that the person on the line is actually a female makes it much more difficult for me to accept it. X even asked her to be "screwed" by someone else. What the hell is wrong with this world?

Now that is the part to which I will relate to my first statement on this post. How could X just utter such words to a female friend? How could the female friend accepted to be treated in such a manner? Weird thing is... according to some friends... the girl is actually attached to him. What does that girl see in him? Why does she still has feeling for him? Phoof... I just don't get all these. X was still pretty arrogant. Z was quiet. A was showing me, CK... "nah.. look at him, look at the way he speaks to the girl on the phone... it doesn't matter... the girl still likes him". I was like, okay... that is his business, that is him and it has nothing to do with me at all. Anyway, what was A trying to prove to me? Talking nicely to girl won't get you a girl but uttering vulgarity to them will actually get you girl? Again, what the hell is wrong with this world...

To be honest I envy someone. Its not A, its not Z and certainly its not X. No way that I'll have something to envy about X. In fact its someone else. I envy him. He has all the opportunity. He can make a girl go melancholy over him. And yet he ain't that good nor perfect himself... but the girl just deserves better. But no. NOPE. The answer is just NOPE. He just refuses to respond. He just wanna fool around. Well, I am being very very nosy here. Perhaps I just should have mind my own business. But... sad to say... I just couldn't. Why? I think I will just remain silent. Maybe when the time is right, I don't have to say it... you guys will notice it.

*I envy someone*
Jealousy Kills

FISHING

2009-02-02T21:54:00.005+08:00

Whoa... its been quite sometime since I last blog about me going fishing. Hmm... actually, I went fishing quite a number of times, its just that I am too lazy to blog about it. I choose to blog about something else (blog about nonsense); LOL. Anyway, I went fishing for prawns and angling last sunday. Our mission on this trip is to find the red snapper.

Another 30 minutes or so boat ride pass Pantai Kerachut, and we started laying down our nets to catch some prawns for baits. Well, we sure did caught some prawns for baits and maybe a bit extra. Hahaha... tiger prawn or whatever prawns you wanna call them. They are huge. I think they originate from those aquaculture farms, probably ran out from the nets.

Okay that was the fishing for prawns part. Now, we proceed to the angling part. Well, we are not those high tech, all for show anglers with super duper fishing reels and rod. Hahaha... LOL... All we used was just a reel of fishing line. That's it, just handline. Well, I have to say... dad got all the good fish. I always get the lousy catfish and crocker. LOL. Anyway, just me and him. We both had fun.

RM30.00 of petrol
10 hours under the blazing hot sun
1 hour boat ride to and fro
A whole chill box of prawns
Some groupers, some baby grouper
Red snapper
Mission accomplished.

Grouper. Not too small, hahaha...
I will go for a bigger one next time (wish me luck)

Red snapper. This is kinda small, but... what to do... still "ang cho"
Mission accomplished.
Next time, God... I want a 3.5kilo red snapper. (wish me luck)

Tiger prawns.
Hey, nasi kandar is gonna charge you RM5 for one of these prawns.
I eat for free, err... maybe not.

Price to pay: I am getting darker and darker ...
Lesson learned: Who gives a damn about how dark I look. I love fishing...

Blue Eyes Blue

2009-01-31T22:14:00.003+08:00

This week's song is not a new song. Blue Eyes Blue by Eric Clapton. Very nice song, deep meaning. This one goes out to all my friends who are sad, devastated and heart-broken.

Blue Eyes Blue - Eric Clapton

I thought that youd be loving me.
I thought you were the one whod stay forever.
But now forevers come and gone
And Im still here alone.

cause you were only playing,
You were only playing with my heart.
I was never waiting,
I was never waiting for the tears to start.

It was you who put the clouds around me.
It was you who made the tears fall down.
It was you who broke my heart in pieces.
It was you, it was you who made my blue eyes blue.
Oh, I never should have trusted you.

I thought that Id be all you need.
In your eyes I thought I saw my heaven.
And now my heavens gone away
And Im out in the cold.

cause you had me believing,
You had me believing in a lie.
Guess I couldnt see it,
I guess I couldnt see it till I saw goodbye.

Chorus

cause you were only playing,
You were only playing with my heart.
I was never waiting,
I was never waiting for the tears to start.

It was you who put the clouds around me.
It was you.

Chorus

Oh, I never should have trusted you.
Oh, I never should have trusted you.
Oh, I never should have trusted you.

CNY

2009-01-29T22:08:00.002+08:00

Chinese New Year...

What is Chinese New Year? To me, Chinese New Year is just another day. Well, Chinese New Year makes you spend more, eat more, talk more and maybe stuck in traffic more often. Hahaha. Don't you guys agree? Anyway, its a good time for those kids and teenagers to do some business. Angpow... oh yea... that is what kids and teenagers are on the lookout for. I think I managed to earn some, not much... anyway, I don't any right to complain so I shall just keep quiet and slowly spend the money.

Staying in Penang and the Chinese people being the majority in this island, all business seems to cease their operation up until today. Well, the bad economic outlook certainly doesn't worry them. When are they gonna resume their business operation? Sigh, what is so bad about it and why am even I talking about it? This is all because I wanna buy something. Its not that I can't buy it some other day. Its just that if I bought today(if the shop was open today), I don't have to pay a single cent for it; LOL. Haihz, gotta wait until my next opportunity to buy it. Nevermind, I shall be patient.

Money money money. I need more money. The underlying topic of this post is MONEY. Any sponsors? I need to buy a lot of things. Things for myself and for ... . Anyway ignore that. I shall work and earn money myself. Come on, I think I am able to sustain my own expenses. For the meantime, my target, top in my list... I wanna get an Airoh. Be it a TR1 or Mathisse RS, even a SV55-sport. I just want any of those mentioned in that list. Haihz... wondering when I will get it...

I’m gonna let the wind blow, Leave the past behind, The memories will do just fine...

2009-01-26T13:38:00.003+08:00

Happy Chinese New Year to everyone. Keong Hee Huat Chai... Gong Xi Fa Chai ... whatever la ... wahaha...

After visiting a few of my relatives, after being interrogated for hours..., looking and comparing myself to a few of my cousins... I wonder what should I do with my life. Seriously, I am facing a dilemma now. I don't know what I want to do in future. Cadet training? Degree? Major in ... ? Working? I don't know what to choose. I don't know how to choose. Which path shall bring me further? Which suits me best? Listen to my heart? Listen to my head? Argh...

The usual scenes during CNY, your aunts starts to brag about how good and successful their sons and daughters are doing certainly gives me a lot of pressure. It has nothing to do with my family members pressuring me. Its all me. My greed for success, my need and want for a companion... they are starting to drive me crazy. The only thing keeping me sane is I guess is songs and musics. Crazy right? People always say time heals all wound. For me, time just worsens it. Music to me heals all wound.

I guess I just have to learn to be more contented with life. Come on, in terms of academic achievement, I am not that far behind. I am not burdened with any financial problems. I am healthy. For God's sake, what more can I ask for? Well, human... there is always something to ask for. Wrong timing? No chemistry? Not meant to be...? Fate? Luck? Curse all that. Why me? Give me an answer and I accept those excuses without a noise.

I promised to share a new song by a new artiste with you guys every week. Sorry, this came kinda late (off schedule). Juwita Suwito - All this time

I knew you loved me
I chose to go
Knew that you would find me
But I pretended not to know
It wasn’t cos I was unhappy
It wasn’t cos I was blind
Or could I have been when I said

I’m gonna let the wind blow
Leave the past behind
The memories will do just fine
They’ll saturate in time
I’m gonna make it on my own
Make it on my own

I took the highway
Built on sand
I knew you’d be there for me
But I refused to hold your hand
The going’s good all around me
But deep inside I can’t find a reason to live without you

Can I let the wind blow?
Leave the past behind?
The memories may cloud my mind
I know I crossed the line
Should I just journey on alone
I can’t bear to find
The pain I caused you all this time
When I look in your eyes

I’m gonna let the wind blow
Leave the past behind
The memories will do just fine
They’ll saturate in time
Don’t have to make it all alone
Cos in your eyes I find
The tears that loved me all the time

All the time

You loved me all this time

Worried, concerned...

2009-01-23T00:39:00.003+08:00

I am the worst guy on Earth that you can find. What the hell is happening to me? It was something like "Oh... shit...". I was seriously crazy that night and I think I said something not too nice (okay... it was bad) to someone. For your info, that was the first time in my life that I uttered such words towards a female person. Okay, I was suppose to say "I am sorry" to her. Come on, I am a guy... but like I said, it was like "Oh... shit...". She called. How bad can that be? Well, not too bad la. We cleared things up and it seems like she was understanding. Good... I shall go on with life as if this never happened. Hahaha...

I am sitting here now in front of my laptop blogging at about 12:45 a.m midnight simply because I can't sleep. Seriously... I just can't sleep. What the FUCK is wrong with me? Arghh... to be honest, I am kinda concerned about one of my friend now who was admitted this morning. Man, she is seriously sick and probably suffering tremendous pain. She is required to go through an operation i think. I am worried about her. I wanna visit her. I must visit her. But... sigh... I am packed. I gotta work tomorrow from 9 am - 1pm and 2pm - 730pm. Anyway... get well soon. Sad to see you have "holes" in your body. Take it as a joke, you're punctured. Hehehehe....

This song goes out to her. Get Well Soon by The Perishers.

Get Well Soon - The Perishers

Promise to get well soon
To feel much better soon
when I come back in june
you'll still be around
get well soon

late november somethings wrong
you've kept it secret way too long
theres not much anyone can do
from here on in its up to you
I wish it wouldnt
but you know
the show goes on, I have to go

Promise to get well soon
To feel much better soon
when I come back in june
you'll still be around
get well soon

Can you feel it, is it true?
Is something gone inside of you
Wish there was something I could do
From here on in, its all to you
I dearly wish it wasnt so
But life goes on, I have to go..

Promise to get well soon
To feel much better soon
when I come back in june
you'll stillbe around
get well soon

You'll get well soon
Just get well soon

No hidden meaning here okay; just hope she'll recover soon. Ehh.. if you're reading this, think of all those angpows. They shall be your motivator. So get well soon. =)

Have I Crossed The Line?

2009-01-21T12:14:00.009+08:00

Life. How should we live our lives? Who determines the paths in our lives? How can we know that the choices we made yesterday will affect us in some other way today, tomorrow and the days ahead of us. But sad to say, that is not the issue here. One question that always lingers on in my mind, why are we put through all those unnecessary dramas? Some dramas are sad enough to made you cry and you cry. Certain other dramas, though they are none of your concern, affects you and hurt you so badly that all you could do is be a lil' emphatic and cry together with her but that wouldn't help it either.

Seriously, last night was the last straw for me. I admit I was drunk last night. Not tipsy but drunk. Ask anyone that was with me that night (you go figure out). Try to ask them what I did and what I would have done. Though certain thing I did were not something that I am very proud of that I can boast with my friends, but I have to say... if you are reading this, and if you think its you... Tell me what can I do just to make you feel better, and I swear to God that if I am able to do that task for you, I wouldn't blink an eye, I wouldn't think twice and I'll definitely won't hesitate.

To be frank I'm starting to miss that cheerful character of yours and second to none is definitely your smile. I couldn't remember when was the last time I see you smile. Not a smile that is fake, burdened by that issue of yours. A pure smile is what I meant. Hey, I know that some people will be puzzled with what I am writing here. Well, if you wanna know more... just ask me la okay. Don't go create stories. I don't have the whole day to write all the details here and the last thing I need is some irresponsible guy who make wild guesses and start spreading rumors faster than he/she can spread bacteria.

Anyway, back to the story. For anyone who knows me well, they will know that I have a soft spot for girls that cry. Hey, I am born that way and I don't intend to change. Probably I am unable to change. Sigh... Back to last night... if I can use only one word to describe last night... it has got to be either mad(pissed off) or sad(down/emo). The moment I saw you cry, phoof... I just went phoof... I don't know how to say it here. I can't find the appropriate words. CK is outta words. Seriously, I feel your pain. But please promise me... that your tears will all dry up, promise me that you'll be strong and you won't waste a tear for such a useless good-for-nothing scumbag. Promise me that last night was the final night that you cry because of him. For God's sake, he is enjoying at the expense of your pain and suffering. But that is if you read this blog, and if you think its directed to you... its you lo.

Haihz... busy talking and showing concern about others while me myself is too tired to take notice of the things happening in my own life. Kepo is what they all say but sad to tell them that I just couldn't help it but to show concern. Again here, few friends of mine should know what I am talking about. They should know why I am kepo. They should know why I show concern. And I think I have to eat my words. The past is not always the history. Ehhh... I know I am going to get into trouble with my post here... but who gives damn about it. I am always asking for chances and I ask for only one chance now. I hope I didn't cross the line.

*fingers crossed*

Something to add here... a chinese song by the title of "unguessable"... an excerpt from the lyrics...

| If a sudden far, a sudden close escape
| is the freedom you want,
| then I rather go back to the life of being alone.
| If a sudden cold, a sudden hot warmth
| is your excuse,
| then I rather to have never been serious with you.

I wonder if I'm the one with a sudden far and a sudden close escape, I wonder if I'm the one that is cold at times and hot warmth at other times. Judging by last night, I think I will just take the blame. Anyway, when is CK not at fault... never... CK is guilty...

Kate Voegele - Devil in Me

2009-01-17T21:33:00.003+08:00

One song from one different artiste to share with you guys every week. It's my new resolution for this term, starting from today... until the end of my college semester.

Okay, so I shall begin with Devil In Me performed by Kate Voegele. Have you heard about her, or even checked her out in myspace or imeem? Well, you should and I am pretty sure if you're someone who loves music from the likes of Missy Higgins or A Fine Frenzy, you wouldn't be disappointed. Anyway, let me share with you guys how I actually discovered this song. To be honest, I have got to thank those people involved in the making of the series, One Tree Hill. By the way, I think it's the best and coolest series and I don't have to mention that it is also one of the most beautifully written series of all time. Err... maybe I am exaggerating here, hahaha... but truth be spoken, the background songs played during the airing of the series, for the past 6 seasons... they are all great songs by great artistes.

Back to the song, Devil In Me. I seriously prefer the acoustic version of this song. Don't bother to look for the studio version. You can't really hear the magic in Kate's voice. Well, be the judge and enjoy the video.

Far in the distance
This is the view from the other side
How did I let this pass me by?
You took me from granted,
Planted thorns in this garden of mine.
What are the chances my hope has died?
Please have mercy
You unnerved me
I don't deserve this pain.

So don't break my heart
I ain't never done
Nothing to deserve this
I'm torn apart
You've had your fun
Do you suppose I earned it?
Do you not see
How I'm begging on my knees?
Don't speak, don't breathe,
You bring out the Devil in me.

Thinking it over
Those were days dark as any night
The end of October felt like a life time
I had a suspicion
But I didn't want to believe you a liar.
You had a mission
To prove me right.

You took my trust
Ground it to dust
Found out I know better. Yea-yeah.

So don't break my heart
I ain't never done
Nothing to deserve this
I'm torn apart
You've had your fun
Do you suppose I earned it?
Do you not see
How I'm begging on my knees?
Don't speak, don't breathe,
You bring out the Devil of

And I don't wanna feel the pain
And I don't want another day
Shackled to your ball and chain, no...
You're entirely a pain
And I'm in quiet misery
All I can do... wait
All I can do is wait

So, I don't have to bear it
There is no charity in your heart
Couldn't you spare me, I've done my part? Yeah.

So don't break my heart
I ain't never done
Nothing to deserve this
I'm torn apart
You've had your fun
Do you suppose I earned it?
Do you not see
How I'm begging on my knees?
Don't speak, don't breathe,
You bring out the Devil of

So don't break my heart
I ain't never done
Nothing to deserve this
I'm torn apart
You've had your fun
Do you suppose I earned it?
Do you not see
How I'm begging on my knees?
Don't speak, don't breathe,
You bring out the Devil in me

Devil in me... (X3)

Encounter + Food Poisoning + Exam

2009-01-15T23:14:00.003+08:00

I feel like I am in the worst state of my life. On Wednesday morning, I got into an encounter with someone, I wouldn't call it a fight. I really tried to avoid that, but seems like its unavoidable. Anyway, its over. Next, as if I am not affected by that, I got sick later in the afternoon. Food poisoning, LOL. Guys, don't eat at mamak anymore. And my problems just wouldn't stop there. I have a re-sit company law exam today. Haihz... Why oh why is all these happening at the same time???

Talking about my health, its been degrading lately. The food poisoning yesterday was the worst thing that can happen to my health. I actually vomited 4 times in one night. That equals to 4 times of chest pain. Well, at the time I was puking, I just hope that someone would be there just beside me, patting my back. LOL. That's not too much to ask for right? But let's not talk about the past. I am feeling much better now.

Next, my re-sit paper. DOOMED. That's all I can say. DOOMED. I think I return 25 marks back to the lecturer. Sigh... I am sighing again. I am not hoping for much. I don't think I can get an A. Anyhow, it's always desirable and preferable to get an A. For now, I am just gonna be satisfied knowing that I will pass the exam. Yea,... achieving a pass feels great now. Guess I am easily satisfied ... maybe I am too contented with my life. Academic achievement is not that important to me anymore I guess. Sounds like I am giving up even before I finish diploma? I don't even know...

An update about my song choice and selection lately. A local artiste by the name of Juwita Suwito. I love her songs. Meaningful yet nice vocals. Go check her out in imeem or youtube. I am pretty sure you won't regret it. Okay... that's it. I gotta go get some nap now. Until next time, reporting here is CK who is not feeling well... but recovering.

We are human, not objects to be pushed around...

2009-01-12T21:09:00.004+08:00

Every single semester has its tale to tell. Every new group assignment tells us a whole new story, one that is known to many as the game of fighting for their group members. This is the time when we see the true colours of our friends, our course mates the very person sitting next to you.

In this game of fighting, some prevail yet others failed. We see the winners smiling triumphantly while the losers weep, slowly gaining back their confidence in socializing again. I think I know human well. Yet, I have not seen the best... or the worst a human can be. For God's sake, we are young adults, rational, mature young adults. Don't you guys think its childish to engage in such game of fighting, not for objects... but for human.

Its sad to see that these selfish yet immature people fail to see that we humans, have values and we are not objects. We are living creatures, we have brains to think, we have a heart/conscience that feels what's right and what's wrong and most importantly, we humans have emotions. A simple procedure of finding group members for assignment turns out to be a cruel, endless mind game. We have debating, we have negotiation... worst we have trading and compromising. WHAT THE HELL ARE THESE NONSENSES? We hear idiotic people saying "I will only take A if you take B". Why are there such question? No one has to take A nor B. A and B can find their own group if they are not choosy.

But yet again, we have to give such people the benefit of the doubt. Why are people avoiding A and B yet certain individuals are so "popular". I think it's time for A and B to think deeply and reassess themselves. Did they contribute in their previous assignment? If the answer is YES, and people are avoiding you, then come to me. I am more than willing to accept a hardworking member.

Talking about this shameful game of fighting in college, we also fail to see that those who actually suffer are those that are in between. Those who wants to leave yet they are tied up. Those who wants to speak up yet afraid of what they say might only make themselves an outcast. Enough guys. Please... stop this as soon as possible. You are just gonna make yourself the biggest joke in college fighting over nerds and pushing aside those who are not so ready to contribute.

ONE LAST THING TO SAY, at least you guys are lucky. You are given a chance to choose your group members. Back there, in the outside world... LEAVE if you can't cooperate or work together. YOU DON'T GET TO CHOOSE WHO YOU WANT TO WORK WITH... so grow up.

Changes is on its way... better or worse??

2009-01-10T19:52:00.006+08:00

Hi guys, it's CK and I am back here to blog about my dearly loved college, KDU college Penang. First of all, I have to say I see changes. They, the changes may be too little too late, but at least I see hope in them and "them" refers to the school of business. Surprised? I know you guys don't expect me to write something nice about KDU; come one... I have be going against the college, cursing and swearing about them ever since this blog was started??? Well, things are getting positive lately. With the employment of Dr Kow (pronounced as "cow" and I hope I got his last name right), it seems as if there is compassion and a certain degree of sympathy in him that makes him seem honest in helping the students.

Anyway, I welcome Dr. Kow on board KDU college Penang. Dr., I hope you make changes to the college, and positive changes ... before it falls apart. If the college falls apart, the failure is definitely contributed by and without a doubt, the main culprit or culprits are crossed-eyed Mango and fat-ass Nee Nee. I gotta say, I do hate the college now... for making me resit or re-attempt the company law exam paper. Come on, what's the past is the past. The results were posted in KCN (ya rite, crossed-eyed Mango claims that there was a technical error) as if we care. If the paper was leaked out (that is what they claim), why can't you guys just use the set B? Why must the college re-hire a new lecturer (Saravanan) and ask the fellow to re-set a new copy of exam for us? I am going to be very irresponsible now and push the blame to the college; IT'S NOT OUR FAULT THAT THE PAPER WAS LEAKED OUT, SO DON'T PENALISE EVERYONE.

Sticking back to the same topic company law, the new lecturer (Saravanan) is not bad actually, in fact very good. I am not joking here. I have been to countless lectures presented by various lecturers (okay, maybe not that many lectures), judging by how he performed today, it's pretty amazing how he manage to pull off what seemed to be an impossible task, to prepare us for the re-sit exam paper this coming Thursday. 3 hours, an hour more than the expected 2 but still, I will give him the credit. Kudos Mr. Saravanan. It's such a shame I didn't have the opportunity to learn company law from you.

It's been quite a good week actually. There is no better way to start a semester than this, minus the company law case; LOL. Like I have said, I am starting see changes in college and I welcome them. It's just my lost that I am graduating soon and taking into consideration my previous encounters with the college, I have vowed not to continue my degree in KDU no more. By the way, the data communication lecturer (Guru, that is how he wants us to address him) is good too. Anyone that disagree with me can bombard my blog anytime. For the meantime, let us give KDU the benefit of the doubt. One step at a time... that is what they all say.

Before I end this post, allow me to confess... I LOVE PINK... PINKY PINKY...wahahaha... a few friends should know what I am talking about...

Andy Lau, I love his songs...

2009-01-06T22:57:00.003+08:00

I was browsing through myspace.com this morning, looking for songs and info about the artistes. After a few hours browsing through myspace.com, I tried my luck digging up info about Andy Lau and surprisingly, he does have a page in myspace.com. I am not sure if he created it or his fans created it for him, but there was a song in the featured playlist that caught my attention. I totally fell in love with the song. Meaningful lyrics... soulful voice... a big round of applause for Andy Lau - Practice (Lian Xi)

If only one more second remained
It would lessen tomorrow's pain of missing you
I'd be willing to let go of everything
In exchange for the existance of any little bit of possibliity

Only a cup of dripping sand is left of happiness
Eyes wide open, watching each act* of sweetness
I'll never have that original commonplace possession again
Until now, it seemed like an helpless extravagant demand

I've already begun to practice, begun to slowly worry
Worry that this world doesn't have you
I've already told my tears not to cry any longer
But how should a love that is ending continue?

I practice daily, becoming familiar daily
With this city that doesn't have you
Trying to delete everything in this "two person world"
All the beauty and memories we once mutually possessed

Love is a 10,000 hectare forest
But you and I have lost our way
Didn't we agree to force our way out together?
How can I be the only one left to return, to return?

Ru guo liu xia duo yi miao zhong
Ke yi jian shao ming tian xiang ni de tong
Wo hui yuan yi fang xia suo you
Jiao huan ren he yi si si ke neng de zhan you

Xing fu zhi shen yi bei sha lou
Yan zheng zheng kan zhe yi mu mu tian mi
Bu hui zai you yuan lai ping fan wu qi de yong you
Dao xian zai jing xiang shi wu zhu de she qiu

Wo yi kai shi lian xi Kai shi man man zhao ji
Zhao ji zhe shi jie mei you ni
Yi jing he yan lei shuo hao bu ku qi
Dan dao shu ji shi de ai gai zen me ji xu

Wo tian tian lian xi Tian tian dou hui shou xi
Zai mei you ni de cheng shi li
Shi zhe shan chu mei ge liang ren shi jie li
Na xie ceng jing gong tong yong you de yi qie mei hao he hui yi

Ai shi yi wan gong qing de sen lin
Mi le lu de que shi wo he ni
Bu shi shuo hao yi qi chuang chu qu
Zen neng sheng wo yi ren hui qu Hui qu

All About Love

2009-01-05T21:32:00.002+08:00

To My Friends Who Are...........SINGLE
Love is like a butterfly.
The more you chase it, the more it eludes you. But if you just let it fly,
it will come to you when you least expect it. Love can make you happy but often it hurts,
but love's only special when you give it to someone who is really worth it.
So take your time and choose the best.

To My Friends Who Are............NOT SO SINGLE
Love isn't about becoming somebody else's perfect person.
It's about finding someone who helps you become the best person you can be.

To My Friends Who Are............PLAYBOY/GIRL TYPE
Never say 'I love you' if you don't care.
Never talk about feelings if they aren't there.
Never touch a life if you mean to break a heart.
Never look in the eye when all you do is lie.
The cruelest thing a guy can do to a girl is to let her fall in love
when he doesn't intend to catch her fall

To My Friends Who Are............MARRIED
Love is not about it's your fault, but I'm sorry.
Not where are you, but I'm right here.
Not how could you, but I understand.
Not I wish you were,
but I'm thankful you are.

To My Friends Who Are............ENGAGED
The true measure of compatibility is not the years spent together but
how good you are for each other.

To My Friends Who Are............HEARTBROKEN
Heartbreaks last as long as you want and cut as deep as you allow them to go.
The challenge is not how to survive heartbreaks but to learn from them.

To My Friends Who Are............NAIVE
How to be in love:
Fall but don't stumble, be consistent but not too persistent, share and never be unfair, understand and try not to demand, and get hurt but never keep the pain.

To My Friends Who Are............POSSESSIVE
It breaks your heart to see the one you love happy with someone else
but it's more painful to know that the one you love is unhappy with you.

To My Friends Who Are............AFRAID TO CONFESS
Love hurts when you break up with someone. It hurts even more when someone breaks up with you. But love hurts the most when the person you love has no idea how you feel.

To My Friends Who Are............STILL HOLDING ON
A sad thing about life is when you meet someone and fall in love, only to find out in the end that it was never meant to be and that you have wasted years on someone who wasn't worth it. If he isn't worth it now he's not going to be worth it a year or 10 years from now. Let go.....

TO ALL MY FRIENDS
My wish for you is a man/women whose love is honest, strong, mature,
never-changing, uplifting, protective, encouraging, rewarding and unselfish.

adrijana, April 2, 2007 : American Foundation for the Blind

http://www.afb.org/message_board_replies2.asp?TopicID=2516&FolderID=8

A New Year, A New Beginning (hopefully)

2009-01-01T19:48:00.019+08:00

Hi guys, CK wishes everyone Happy New Year. Talking about how fast time flies, it is already 2009. I have been in college for close to 2 years and yet it felt like yesterday; LOL. I have register for my new semester ma, hehehe....

A new year, a new beginning. I do hope so. I pray that 2009 will be a better year for me despite all those negative forecast and predictions. Sigh, starting my new year with such a bad exam result, the worst by far... I hope I can have all the luck I need.

Sorry guys, there is no update regarding the party on new year's eve. I didn't attended any party. I was staying at home, listening to Chinese songs while chatting with my another lonely friend from Kulim, hahaha... I cancelled my plans to follow my friends to the beach as I was not feeling well, physically and mentally. I know and I am pretty sure that if I had attended the party last night, someone has got to carry me home. I will definitely drink and drink a lot until I become unconcious. No one can blame me, my situation now is not allowing me to be happy and cheerful at all. I know it's stupid, but at least all those liquors and alcohol will do some help in making me forget all those sad stories in my life. Anyway, enough about this. The party is over. I didn't go. The end.

And by the way, my plan to ditch all my sadness failed. Come on, its gonna take more than 24 hours. Maybe I will never be able to ditch all the sadness. Nobody knows... not even me.

Hmm... this year is totally different compared the years before. I could still remember that I sleep at about 5am for last year's celebration. As I did not celebrate with my friends this year, I woke up at 7am. I am pretty sure some of my friends are still awake at the time I wake up. LOL. I was pretty bored waking up so early (couldn't really sleep), I went and disturb dad from his sleep. Hahaha... He almost killed me (not joking here), I woke him up to ask him to bring me fishing today. And yup, he did ... after he cooled down a little (he was still pissed he woke up that early on new year; LOL).

To be exact, we didn't really go fishing for fish today. Instead we were looking for prawns. Yupz, prawns... and HELL YEAH, today is really a fun day at the sea. You should have look at the size of the prawns. Unbelievable. We managed to caught about 2 kilos of white prawn (phek hea), about 2 kilos of flower crabs, a kilo of cuttlefish (sotong katak) and a lot of fish from various species such as catsharks a.k.a "yu bodoh", croakers a.k.a "gelama" and "tenggerong, chinese call sam ge", grouper a.k.a "kerapu", and some fishes that is unknown of to me and my dad, LOL. There was a few extra too. Let the pics do the talking. Sorry if the pics are a lil blur. It's taken with a very lousy camera phone; LOL.

A big parrot fish (about half a kilo). I was a bit slow in snapping the pic.
Dad chopped out all the fins ade; LOL.
A lobster. Oh Yeah.. a lobster... hehehe
A big tiger prawn, from the wrist to the elbow. And specimens of white prawns.

Something extra today. To be honest, I am kinda sad. I wanted to let it go. Too bad it has passed away. : (

There is nothing I can do anymore. I took and snap some pics just to share with you guys.

It's a seahorse. The pic is kinda blur. Its kinda cute, kinda small but I am kinda sad. Its dead now.

Nothing is stopping me from failing...

2008-12-31T11:13:00.002+08:00

I am totally not in a great shape. Before that, allow me to apologize for filling up this blog with negativity. By all means, I am not a negative person but the things that are happening to me lately is really forcing me to think twice, filling myself up with negative emotions.

How can life get any worse than this? I have never felt so down until now. To feel so pushed aside, it was as if I am just someone ordinary or perhaps I am just another random guy. Come on, you don't have to do that right? I am not gonna mention it here but I am sure a few of my friends would know what I am referring to. Anyway, the counting ends. It is 3 weeks and 5 days. To some, it may be a short time period but I can assure you, it felt as if it was my longest month...

As if I don't have enough problem to deal with, I gotta face my WORST exam results by far. I was expecting my results to be a whole lot better but reality just struck me and proves to me that as always, I am just a dreamer. Being one of the few active students in class, a lot of my friends were expecting me to score well but sad to say, I am just gonna disappoint them. Damn it. My CGPA is going to flunk so badly, it is as if it was dragged down by a 10 tonne weight. And HELL YEA, I was dreaming to be the best KDU student... I think I gotta wake myself up as soon as possible.

I fail in my life. And I thought I could rely on what I do best, my studies. Life is just unfair. I fail in both my life and my studies. I am the biggest failure.

It's new year's eve today. Soon, the year 2008 is going to be over and marks the start of year 2009. I wish someone can tell me what to do or what more can I do. I plan to ditch all my sadness tonight. I hope I can do it. I hope I can find that courage to let go. Nobody said it was going to be easy. Meanwhile, the only thing I am sure that will happen is that I have been and will continue to cry myself to sleep, and drag myself off bed until I am able to let go of this pain ...

An excerpt from Sam Lee - A Brief Encounter

I love someone, I love her until I was a little drunk
Please tell me who are you, for you're able to make me become inconsistent
You're not tired, yet I've loved you to the point of exhaustion
I've never risked my own safety and sacrificed my all for anybody

No beginning, No ending... No future...

2008-12-29T19:26:00.003+08:00

My mind is total mess now.

I need to express myself.

What hurts the most? Is it the feeling of breaking up with someone or the feeling of seeing your loved ones leaving with someone else? Knowing that you're committed, but the other party just wouldn't give a you chance. Or he/she did gave you a chance, but you didn't take it seriously. Really wanting to love and cherish him/her for the rest of your life yet you failed? Seeing a hope that there will be a future with that guy/girl but only to live on to know that the hope was just a dream, and what is worse is that drowning yourself in a pool of tears looking at your hope being dash. Every sight of him/her with another guy/girl; it's equal if not worse compared to the every cuts on your already bruised heart.

Sometimes, I feel that it's no longer worth fighting for. Nothing is worth my struggle, what more my effort. At times, I feel like giving up but my "never say die" and stubborn attitude is not helping at all. Besides, it has always been my principle to finish what I've started. As we all know, everything that has a beginning must have an end. It is just the matter of time. I know it's going to be difficult for me. Yet, I blame no one for I was the one who made the decisions, I was the one who came looking for trouble. But there is one thing that arouses my curiosity. If there is one thing I wanna know, I wanna know how you feel. If you're not moved at all, then I guess I am just a total failure, in fact the biggest failure in life for that just shows that I haven't given it my all.

Our past is really never far from us. Granted the right circumstances, our past is just like yesterday. The wounds that once bruised our heart was still as fresh; the same is to be said about the everlasting memories of the past, they too are still fresh. Nevertheless, things definitely had changed as time passes by. The thing that wounded me back then was the thought of me having to "give in"... and at the same give up... and move on... Now, it's a whole different story. Now, the thing that wound me is the sight of you suffering. I constantly ask myself if I had contributed to your suffering. What if I was persistent? What if I've pushed it? I guess there is too many "what if" here... All and all, if I say I am not moved or provoked, I must be lying.

I wanna learn. And I assure you I am a good learner. But I guess no one can teach me. I think I just have to learn it the hard way and that my friends... is through failure... and more failures... before I have grown so mature one day, I look back at what I wrote here today, and have a big laugh at myself.

I am in total mess now. No beginning, no ending... just a gloomy future...

Wrecked...

2008-12-29T10:43:00.002+08:00

Hi guys... I am pretty bored now. It's a public holiday today and I am left with nothing to do except sitting here in front of my laptop, blogging about my not so extraordinary life; LOL...

Last weekend was kinda packed. It was my cousin's wedding event and as usual, I gotta throw in some help. Hmm... what a loving couple they are. The whole wedding thing just suits the season now, the season of happiness. Sigh, the whole wedding thingy makes me dream a lot; hahaha. CK is a dreamer; LOL. It makes me wonder, when and where will my wedding take place and most importantly, who is the bride. All those thoughts, arghhh.. it just eats myself up. But I have got to say, the whole wedding event does have a magic that makes you feel happy and cheerful, a magic that I believe none can explain.

Next, Coffee Island, the night of December 28, 2008. Truth be spoken, I believe my friend saw with her own eyes now the other girl that wrecked her whole relationship. There is nothing for the guy to hide now. There is nothing he can deny now. Sigh, all and all, I just feel that it was not worthwhile for my friend. Hope she will recover soon. A piece of advice to her and myself, sometimes what we think is best for us and what we want may turn out to be the opposite. Both of us have just gotta learn to accept changes.

Finally, my plan to stop counting tonight is TOTALLY WRECKED. One of my friend couldn't make it and that has caused the plan to be cancelled. Ishh!!! Haiz... I guess everything is fated. What are hopes for if they are to dashed over and over again...

A Not So Happening Christmas Eve Party

2008-12-25T16:49:00.004+08:00

Merry Christmas everyone...

Updates...

Last night wasn't as crazy compared to the usual nights we had before in the previous years or during our friends birthday. Hmm... I wonder why??? There were a lot of people celebrating but somehow, it seems as if something was missing. The atmosphere wasn't as happening as before. Sigh, could the current economy recession be a contributory factor???

Hmm... I did keep to my promise for once at least. Hehehe.... I was a good boy last night. I didn't drink. Hahaha... I guess I gotta thank someone for making me kept to my promise. However at the same time, I swear to God, given the chance and the strength, I will beat the shit out of this guy. I was planning to have lots of fun at the beach but luck just wasn't on my side (or maybe luck was on my side). Why did I bump into him??? Fated??? Sigh, I am asking too many questions.

Anyway, I was pretty pissed off that is for sure. Somethings never change while other things changed a lot. Other things completely changed. If my memory serves me right, last year for the same occassion, my friend was with her friend together celebrating but this time around, I did not see my friend. Ish!!! I don't wish to go any deeper. I have got to apologize to someone for being too nosy; I should have just walked away and mind my own business. Sorry, I really didn't mean to ruin your night but I really felt that you should know about it.

Sigh, what a great night ruined by what a small incident. Nevertheless, a lot of my friends are not in good shape too. I just know that nothing last forever. A very close friend of mine had just recently became a victim of relationship problem. Well, he got it pretty badly. Being in a relationship, loving and cherishing this girl for close to 2 years, and I thought they were going to be successful; but who knows... who knows... who could ever predicted that one silent night, the girl rang him up and just thrash things out with him. The girl was pretty mean (that was what I heard) to just tell my friend, after close to 2 long years that she has finally lost all her feelings for my friend. Damn it... Girls, you can't live with them... but can't live without them...

Alright... I think I am done with those emo stories. For God's sake, it's suppose to be the season of happiness. Hmm... new year is in a few days time. I lam ooking forward to that party on new year's eve. Yeah!!! I hope I can enjoy myself then. By the way, this coming December 29, I hope I can stop counting after that day... Hopefully... I will keep you guys posted...

2 Weeks and 5 days, almost...

2008-12-24T08:54:00.007+08:00

Hi guys, CK is back again and I think I have a few things to share with guys.

First and foremost, my bike almost broke down again. Almost but just not yet, hehehe. Sigh, just like old people, old bikes are also more prone to illness and diseases. Nonetheless, the difference is that bikes are just machines... a human life is much more valuable(like obviously, duh!!!). Anyway, talking about how my bike almost succumb to illness, it was all due to a small rubber O-ring on the radiator. The bike was leaking coolants all the way to the workshop. I was so afraid the bike might just stall mid-way or blown up into pieces, hahaha. Hmm... and I thought the repair would burn a hole in my pocket, luckily the mechanic just charged me RM10. Luckily; LOL.

The second thing is something I am not proud of. Last weekend was pretty messed up for me. I told myself that I just gotta keep my cool but somehow I lost it. Damn it!!! F@#% it anyway. Idiot deserves it. Who ask him to come asking for it. I did warn him not to provoke me again but he just didn't want to believe me. Fine. Now, he is paying for it; a swollen eye. LOL. Nevertheless, the issue is over. I don't wish to talk about the past no more. Let bygones be bygones.

The third thing is that I am pretty messed up myself. Hmm... a quote from Goo Goo Dolls song titled Name, "scars are souvenirs you never lose, the past is never far". Well, I agree with quote and it actually reflects on my real life, at least it reflects the situation now. Mind you, I am using the word "past", meaning it is the past, history. My past was never far. Anyhow, I gotta keep a distance unless I am left with no options. So far so good I can say.

The forth and maybe the most common thing is that, I am still counting. It has been close to 2 weeks and 5 days since I last met her face to face. I know why people call me dumb cause her house is just like maybe less than 5 KM from my house. Everyone said I can just drive over to her house. Well, I don't think they really understand. It's not the distance. It's not how far. Even if it is a matter of distance, I am pretty sure no one can measure it, for there is no metric unit for it.

Lastly, it's Christmas eve today. Wow, talking about how fast time flies. Another year is going to be over. Hmm... no Christmas wishes this year. Duh!!! let's be realistic. The world's economy is facing a recession now and our Santa is probably feeling the pinch too; LOL. Back to being serious, I think I am going to be pretty insane tonight, hehehe. That was how I celebrated it last year and considering that I am celebrating it the same way this time around, things wouldn't change that much. I will keep you guys informed of the progress. That's it for now... back to work...

Meeting pocket-friendly people...

2008-12-19T17:48:00.006+08:00

Hello to everyone. Today has been quite a fun day for a motorcycle geek like me, hehehe....

A few days ago, I can't help but to notice that the carburettors on my bike was leaking petrol. Damn it, haiz... I should have expected this considering the bike is just a few years shy of my age. To be exact, the bike is already registered for 15 years, but still going strong. Nevertheless, you want to ride the bike, you have got to maintain and service the bike. To be honest, I think I made a bad choice preferring bikes over cars but it's too late to change my mind. Anyway, I am very satisfied with the bike, minus the maintaining and servicing part which burned a hole in my pocket; LOL.

At first, I wanted to have my bike serviced at Cartoon's shop, but for Gods sake he is one hell of a blood sucker. I took my bike to his shop and ask him for some suggestions. Well, he suggested that I get the carburettors cleaned and serviced. Hmm... I am no mechanic but I guess I have got to agree with him that is in getting the carburettors cleaned. But there is where the agreement ends. I asked him how much will it cost me to get the carburettors serviced and guess how much he said, a whopping RM85!!! Geez... I am already in a "tight" situation lately and you are asking for RM85 for a job that maybe take you an hour and cost you nothing at all? I think I will pass...

This has left me with no choice but to go to Bulldog's shop (I don't like Jessie's place nor those big shops). Well, I don't really like the mechanic there but they are more friendly; as a matter of fact they are more pocket-friendly. The mechanic doesn't do a very thorough job and most of the time, he will recommend you cheap parts and accessories. I HATE him for recommending dad to fix that Duro tyre now fitted on the front wheel. Anyhow, he says he will charge me RM60 which I tried to negotiate with him and finally we came to an agreement, RM50. Yeah... let's get our hands dirty.

We disassembled the tank, the airbox and finally the carburettors. Wow... I have to say the carburettor on my bike (twin carbs) is pretty huge. Hmm... but thank god they are rather frugal on the fuel. Later on he disassemble the carburettors and cleaned them, sealed them and fix them back. No more leakage. Done... but there goes my RM50. Somehow after the service, I felt that the bike had better response and was smoother than ever. Okay-lah, it was worth spending that RM50.

Next... For those who had seen my bike up close, you sure can't help but to notice how THICK the seat was. Duh... the previous owner certainly knew something about comfort, adding at least 3 inches thickness on the seat. Haiz... sorry, it's not to my liking. After servicing the carburettors, I went around town to find someone to help me do the seats. And again, I met another blood sucker. Hmm... I told him that I needed to get the seat back to its original shape and thickness, and to rewrap the seat. Guess how much he said? RM90. I was like, "What??? RM90???"

I really don't get people nowadays. Why must they charge young teenagers like me so expensive? Do they think that all young teenagers are stupid or I am stupid? Why on earth do you need RM90 to reshape and rewrap the seat? It's not that I am using some expensive alcantara to wrap my seat which I am sure you don't even have it even though if I wanted it. Fine. I continue searching until I bump into this shop, Yang Cushion somewhere in Perak Road. Well, the boss is very friendly and more importantly he was also like Bulldog's mechanic, pocket-friendly. He wanted to charge me RM60 to get it done and as usual, I negotiated with the guy and finally he agree on RM55. I have to say, he did quite an okay job. I was pretty satisfied. I have to say, being a lil' thick face and trying to find alternatives and negotiating saved me RM70. Now that makes a lot of difference to the damage done to my pocket. Hahaha...

Finally, my bike looks a lil' prettier/ more handsome now after reshaping the seat. But I still have a lot of things to do. Next most important thing that I am going to spend on the bike is investing on a set of good tyres, maybe from Metzeler or Bridgestone. It depends on my budget though. I may settle for a set of Maxxis. I've been doing a lot of research on this tyre manufacturer from Taiwan and so far, the reviews on their product has been quite satisfactory. But one thing is for sure, I am not gonna spend my hard-earned money on Duro's. NO WAY...

DONE. It took me half a day to get the whole thing done. I was rather tired when I reached home at 2 p.m. For your info, I slept at 3 a.m last night and woke up at 7.30 a.m. Hmm... what I did was a secret and shall remain as a secret. All and all, maybe I was thinking of something, or maybe someone. Without taking lunch, I lie down on my dad's reclining chair and I just doze off. I woke up at 5 p.m and here I am blogging about my activity for the day December 19, 2008. That's it for now. Until my next post, this is CK... a motorcycle geek... hehehehe...

Jason Walker - You Fill My Heart

2008-12-17T18:39:00.004+08:00

Time to share with you guys another song, but... this time, it's an English song. Well it's not that I no longer listen to Chinese songs, I still am but this particular song is so nice. I heard it from Season 5 of One Tree Hill and I went through all the hassle just to find out the title of the song. Well, it doesn't stop there. It's pretty difficult to download this song from the net or any P2P apps such as Lime Wire and Frost Wire. Anyhow, I learned a few tricks from the net and managed to somehow steal the song. Hehehe...

Song title: You Fill My Heart
Artiste: Jason Walker

When I saw your face
It was like a space
In my heart was filled
It's like I knew
From the very start
That you were every other part of me

It's like I have loved you since
From the moment when
Since time began
You fill my heart

Oh, love of mine
Why did it take so long to find
Your touch
Hope was never gone
Even though it took so long
To find you

Because I have loved you since
From the moment when
Since time began
And I have loved you since
From the moment when
Since time began
You fill my heart

And I have loved you since
From the moment when
Since time began
And I have loved you since
From the moment when
Since time began
And I have loved you since
From the moment when
Since time began
You fill my heart

Hmm...

2008-12-15T08:11:00.003+08:00

Hmm... life for the past week was really quiet and dull. A few of my lucky friends had actually went for their vacation while some had try to earn some extra cash by working and others were so busy living their lives that they didn't even had time to get online. Sigh... how much I wished for the new semester to start now but not for it to end. Silly me, right???

Hmm... maybe I had less friends that I thought I had. The numbers of phone calls I received 2 weeks ago compared to the numbers of phone calls I received now is a clear evident. A sudden drop of almost 80%. Now that is remarkable; LOL. Anyway, I think I had forgotten to mention that there was also an 80% increase 2 weeks ago compared to the weeks before. Hahaha... I guess we'll call it even.

Hmm... I went fishing again yesterday. One thing is for sure, the fishes are back from their holidays. Hahaha. Well, it was kinda hot yesterday and I am kinda "fried"; LOL. Nevertheless, the sea was pretty calm and that is a good thing. I had to say yesterday was somewhat a lucky day. A torn up net, but 5 threadfins??? If it's not luck, then what was it... Hehehe. Coming back home with a chill box half filled with threadfins (not empty handed this time...) it felt good.

Hmm... back to college related matters. If I am not mistaken, the registration date for the Jan 09 semester is on the 30th and 31st of December. That was the info I got from Cik Aini. If you are interested to know more or want to reconfirm the date, do call the college. For the Aug 08 semester results, I am not too sure but I do believe that you will get your result on the registration date itself. That's it for now... Best of luck to everyone...

My confessions...

2008-12-11T20:09:00.005+08:00

I confess that I am a workaholic. For this holiday, I had actually applied for the lab assistant job in KDU and I was accepted. Hmm... I may not earn much from it, but I did learn a lot from the job. Well, I started the job on Tuesday morning, being my first day on the job it was something like of a training. I learned about how the login system works, how the queueserver printing system works and how to scan documents for students. I admit, the job is pretty boring but I guess I shouldn't complain too much.

There is another thing that I have to confess. I hate Maybank. Maybank sucks. Working with KDU, I was required to have an account in Maybank in order for them to bank in my salary for me. I didn't have one, so I was asked to open an account with Maybank. Okay, I had just learn about the psychology of waiting in Services Marketing class and I know why waiting will feel much longer than they actually is. Fine. Well, is 1.5 hours waiting long enough? I was asked to wait for my turn and there was only 2 customers who came before me. I am wondering why the bank workers need 1.5 hours to handle 2 customers. For God's sake, it's ONLY 2 customers. Why do they need 45 minutes for one customer? Anyway, its done. I don't wanna talk about it anymore.

Not done yet. I still have one thing to confess. I love my bike. I just love it so much. Hmm.. how fast can a 650cc V-Twin go? 1st gear at 8500rpm, it reaches 80km/h, shift up and you're engaged with the second gear which brings you up to 120km/h, shift up again and you will be exceeding the speed limit and you can feel the torque all across the rev. Extra info to share with you, reaching 100km/h just takes about 4 secs. Not joking here. It is my first time experiencing such a broad torque curve on any motorcycle. Suddenly, I feel that small bikes are really so underpowered. Anyway, the fastest I ever went with the bike is 160km/h and damn it's fast. However speed kills. Someone, anyone please constantly remind me that I will get myself killed if I don't stop this madness and addiction to speed.

OKAY. Maybe I have one last thing to confess. Sorry, I promise this is the last one.

I miss her. It is just so difficult. It has been like almost a week, seven days and a hundred and sixty eight hours since I last saw her face to face. I am starting to think that if a week has become a time period which is so long, how am I gonna cope with it when she leaves and it is real soon before she leaves. Hmm... how can one fall and fall so deep, a question I ask myself every single day before sleep. Jokes or not, she is the first thing I think of every morning and the last thing that I think of before I sleep. One will ask, does she deserves it? Answer is YES. Ask me today, ask me tomorrow, ask me next week, next month, next year and the answer will always remain as YES, always and forever.

I end this post with a song to share with you guys. The title is Waiting For You, by Anson Hu.

Week 1 of My Holiday...

2008-12-08T21:06:00.007+08:00

Holidays are so boring... Haiz... Rotting at home...

Funny is, I guess it is holidays for the fishes too. I went fishing lately, but to my surprise, for once... I came back empty handed. EMPTY HANDED. I had been following my dad fishing for at least 5 years now and never once did I came back empty handed. Well, everything has its first time. Where has all the luck gone to??? Most importantly, where has all the fishes gone to... ? Please come back soon, LOL.

With no fishes to catch, fishing eventually becomes boring. In order to save myself from boredom, I resorted to digging for shellfish. I am not sure of the exact name in English, but I am damn sure the Malays call it siput remis and we Chinese just call is siput. So what did we do with the siput? Well, if there is one reason I love mum's cooking is because of this siput. Hehehe. She is so good at preparing it, thick soy sauce, lots of ginger and sugar... Yummy...

They are beautiful isn't it? They are yummy too... after it is cooked and prepared by mum, Hehehe

Mum is very active lately. She has been baking cake non-stop. 2 fruit cakes and 2 butter cakes in one week. All finished up within one week. Hmm... wondering why I can't get any fatter...

Today, she made some curry puffs and damn they are tasty. And they look beautiful too. So they say you gotta serve the eye first before the mouth... Hahaha... well take a look at the curry puffs... the pastry has a very unique shell-like design...

Yummy!!! I am so gonna gain weight this hols (hopefully)

Sam Lee - Recently

2008-12-08T14:47:00.002+08:00

I am deeply addicted to songs from Sam Lee now. I am officially not CK anymore... LOL.

This song is dedicated to someone. Hope that someone will get the message. Think carefully before you do anything, okay???

Sam Lee - Recently ( 李聖傑-最近 )

This song has a very very sad music video. It is about a girl who is so truly, madly and deeply in love with her boyfriend. One day, the girl found out that her boyfriend is cheating on her. Trying to salvage the severed relationship, the girl resorted to using her own body, betraying her own self to rescue her lost love by eternally possessing her boyfriend physically instead. Later on, the girl drugged her boyfriend and commit suicide and kill the boyfriend together with her.

Lyrics translated

Recently you didn't talk much
What? Why?
Is there any matter?
You are not happy
Heard that you are lonely recently
A bit distraught
A bit hasty
However, I cannot be on you side

I don't wish to give you everything of me.
I cannot be what you want me to be.
We are not meant for each other but we deny it.
On several occasion we cry for each other.
All day long like this, it's the beginning
I think all have ended long ago
Don't want to be bounded again
Don't want to suffer again
Next path will be better

Recently you didn't talk much
What? Why?
Is there any matter?
You are not happy
Heard that you are lonely recently
A bit distraught
A bit hasty
However, I cannot be on you side

I don't wish to give you everything of me.
I cannot be what you want me to be.
We are not meant for each other but we deny it.
On several occasion we cry for each other.
All day long like this, it's the beginning
I think all have ended long ago
Don't want to be bounded again
Don't want to suffer again
Next path will be better

Love I cannot give everything
I cannot be what you want me to be.
We are not meant for each other but we deny it.
On several occasion we cry for each other.
All day long like this, it’s the beginning
I think all have ended long ago
Don't want to be bounded again
Don't want to suffer again
Next path will be better

This time we can be very happy

Sam Lee - A Brief Encounter

2008-12-07T14:55:00.002+08:00

A Chinese song to share with you guys... Try to grasp the meaning of the song if you can.

Sam Lee (Li Sheng Jie) - A Brief Encounter (Ca Jian Er Guo)

The lyrics of the song, translated..

I've loved someone, loved until I was a little drunk
Tell me who you are, to be able to make me become so unusual
You're not tired, yet I've loved you to the point of exhaustion
I've never risked my own safety and sacrificed my all for anybody
I'm standing at the equilibrium point, but I still feel it's a little dangerous
Maybe it's because I can't see and can only use my intuition/feelings

He's not a good man, and is not a good lover either
To me, we are just two people who had a brief encounter
There are so many good men out there; without him, life will still go on
I will no longer make you feel lonely, and I won't let you feel more hurt
Listen to me, you must learn how to live well
Even if the future has many wrongs, at least you'll have my greeting and my warmth, accompanying you through the days

Listen to me, you shouldn't do this
Don't look at me and say you already know what you should do
You feel pain, and I'm willing to bear the pain with you
As long as you're not afraid to get hurt, I'll accompany you no matter how difficult it gets
I'm standing at the equilibrium point, but I still feel it's a little dangerous
Maybe it's because I can't see and can only use my intuition/feelings

He's not a good man, and is not a good lover either
To me, we are just two people who had a brief encounter
There are so many good men out there; without him, life will still go on
I will no longer make you feel lonely, and I won't let you feel more hurt
Listen to me, you must learn how to live well
Even if the future has many wrongs, at least you'll have my greeting and my warmth, accompanying you through the days

He's not a good man, and is not a good lover either
To me, we are just two people who had a brief encounter
There are so many good men out there; without him, life will still go on
I will no longer make you feel lonely, and I won't let you feel more hurt
Listen to me, you must learn how to live well
Even if the future has many wrongs, at least you'll have my greeting and my warmth, accompanying you through the days

2008-12-05T22:26:00.006+08:00

At last, the exam week is over. After a long and tiring battle with the exam paper, I can finally get the rest that is so ever needed. For your info, I am a guy who loves sleeping but for the past week, I have not been getting sufficient sleep. Maximum sleep that I had for a night in the past week is 5 hours if I am not mistaken. Sigh, I could still recall that one of the girls in college actually said that I was getting thinner and thinner and I think the insufficient sleep is the main culprit. Is that a good thing? Certainly not. LOL. Any thinner and I will be blown away by the winds...

Nevertheless, the end of exams means the beginning of the holidays. Some welcome it, others just don't know what to do with their holidays to a point where even some claimed that they will lose their sense of direction. Well, it doesn't make sense to me anyway. There are plenty of things to do for the holidays. And come on, haven't you guys forgot that you were complaining about being so tired handling all those assignments? Grab this opportunity to take some rest and maybe reflect back on the past. For those who are workaholics, you may grab this chance to gain some work experience and at the same time earn some extra cash...hehehe.

*** continue pt 2 ***

I noticed that I have changed a lot lately. Previously, I don't listen to chinese songs and needless to say, how would I even get addicted to it if I don't listen to them. Now, time has passed. Things have changed. I listen to chinese songs and I listen to the same song repeatedly for hours sometimes. Guess I am going nuts. I can't seem to figure out what was the reason that is causing this until... finally I think I got the answers.

Looking back in the past, once, there was this one individual that managed to change my perception about motorcycles. I was a very determined but stubborn guy in the past (and still is now) and I thought no one could ever easily change my perception or mindset. However, guess I wrong. That particular individual did manage to change my perception and attributing the same factor for this "addiction to chinese songs" problem, I am pretty sure someone has influenced me in some way in terms of my music and song selection.

Haiya, I am sure I don't have to mention who that someone is. Just take a guess and you already have the answer. No matter who that someone is; the change in my perception about motorcycles did not last long, maybe because that someone has become a chapter in my life. On the other hand, I feel that the change in my music and song selection will last long and even become permanent. Why? Maybe because this "someone" is not a chapter in my life. Maybe this "someone" is different. Maybe this "someone" is more important and significant...

Summary: there are TWO significant individuals in my life. One changed my perception about motorcycles, the other changed my view/perception about chinese songs. One shall remain as history, the other... is the present and I hope she will be the future. Anyway, hopes are just hopes and shall remain as hopes. As one of my ex-classmates did mention to me, if it is yours, you can't escape from it even if you want to...

Exam Week

2008-12-03T23:11:00.003+08:00

It feels like ages since I last blog. Life is so busy nowadays. It's exam week and everyone is rushing about looking for tips and hints. Well, I got a complaint to make here. As if I don't have enough problem of my own, I still need to handle others' problem. Geez... I need a break. I need a vacation.

Exam weeks are often the ugliest week in college. Accusations are thrown blindly and a person's good image and reputation is tarnished. I pity one particular friend. Like she has said and explained to me, a promise is a promise. She kept to her promise, but keeping that promise meant that she would have to be selfish. Well, no one ever said the world is not a cruel place to be in. Survival of the fittest. You have to have your own initiative to do your "homework" or you will be left out. It is not right for you to blame anyone for not helping you...

Exam weeks are not exam weeks without arguments. People argue due to stress and burnout. You study and study and study, not realizing how much time you have spent studying yet nothing goes in. Then you get mad at every single thing. You get provoked by every small tiny matters. You start cursing people. People start cursing you back. Bam!!! You have an argument. Childish isn't it? You tell me-lah... Haiz...

Exam week is often the week that you see people lose weight and have black rings on their eyes. Burning the midnight oil and skipping meals just for the sake of covering every single subject, going through every single topic and subtopics. Is there a point? Well, it's difficult to say. I am not saying that last minute revision doesn't work. My point is that studying wasn't meant to be so difficult and demanding. Anyway, I rest my case, can't say much... Why? I am one of the victims too; LOL.

Tomorrow another paper, the next day two more papers. There goes one more semester, and there are two more sems to go. Holiday for a month, repeat A MONTH, 30 DAYS... What am I gonna do during the holidays??? Haiz...

Still am addicted to chinese songs. I guess there is no cure for it... Don't care la, not bothered anymore if I listen to chinese or english songs. Not related though, I AM THE ONLY PERSON/GUY IN PLANET EARTH THAT NEEDS A LIL' MORE CONFIDENCE TO SPEAK UP AND TELL HER WHAT I NEED TO TELL HER, AND THAT IS WHILE SHE IS STILL HERE. OR... I am gonna live my life filled with regrets...

Addicted to Chinese Songs

2008-11-28T20:07:00.005+08:00

I am not myself lately; LOL. Even my brother was shocked to find out that I am listening to chinese songs lately. As a matter of fact, I am addicted to chinese songs. Hmm... wondering what is causing this.

For those who know me, I don't speak chinese (mandarin and cantonese) neither do I understand them. So why am I listening to chinese song since I don't understand them? Well, chinese songs I listen to are those that fall under the emo songs category; LOL. To be honest, chinese songs are not that bad actually. Performers such as Wang Lee Hom is able to "give life" to his song and somehow, I feel kinda connected to his songs or at least one of them, Wei Yi or Only One. My comment for this song, how romantic can a man get??? Well, judge it yourself.

It will be best if you can check out the lyrics and understand them. I hereby dedicate this song to someone, my one and only...

Wang Lee Hom - The One and Only

My sky is so fresh and clean
The clear promise is the air of the past
The person holding my hand is you
But your smile; cannot be clearly seen

Was it because a star changed its heart's preference?
The wishes of the past; have all been thrown away
I can't breathe recently
Even my own shadows; I too want to escape

Baby you're my one and only
The two worlds have all changed shapes; it's not that easy to go back
Assurance; you're my one and only
I say I Love You alone to the phone; I really love you
Baby I cannot love you more than this

Was it because a star changed its heart's preference?
The wishes of the past; have all been thrown away
I can't breathe recently
Even my own shadows; I too want to escape (escape)

Baby you're my one and only
The two worlds have all changed shapes; it's not that easy to go back
Assurance; you're my one and only
I say I Love You alone to the phone; I really love you
Baby I cannot love you more than this

Actually, it has already passed the limit of love

Baby you're my one and only
The two worlds have all changed shapes; it's not that easy to go back
Assurance; you're my one and only
I say I Love You alone to the phone; I really love you

Baby I cannot love you more than this...

One week before exam

2008-11-25T12:54:00.003+08:00

I don't even know why am I blogging now. Exam is just around the corner (in one week time) yet I am still in relaxation mode. Here I am, writing nonsense about myself. For God's sake, I should be studying now but something just bothers me. May I ask why must it happen now? Am I not worried about exam? The apparent answer is no. I am worried but then my mind gets distracted and there goes all my attention needed to revise for the upcoming exam.

Life is full of choices. We make up our mind and it is just too difficult for us to turn back and change our decision. Approximately 6 months ago, I went through what I may say the darkest moments of my life. I had no one to turn to, no one to lean on and worse, I lost my sense of direction. That very moment, I thought I learned my lesson. But I guess I was being too naive....

Once a while, you meet people in your life. While some may not have significant effects on your life, others create a whole lot of impact making them far more important that anyone else. Luck could be the only reason that explains why we meet them. For me, I couldn't be more thankful for I meet that someone when I was at the lowest point of my life. Nothing much has changed though. Perhaps fate decided that things weren't suppose to change at all. Anyhow, should I be glad that there was no changes? Frankly, I don't even have an answer myself...

Giving up was never easy. That was why it took me so long to let go in the past. Growing up in a somewhat discriminatory environment taught me that I have got to be tough and resilient and I thought I was tough and resilient. Nonetheless, these past few days proved me wrong. I didn't wanted to give up. I hold true to the saying "never say die". In fact, I have not given up. But giving in? What is giving in? Never have I encounter such words in this matter but who cares anyway. If giving up is gonna be tough, giving in is even tougher I guess.

What is the measure of love? Before that, what is love?, a frequently asked question by those who suffers from unrequited love. How do we measure one's love for another human being? Hmm... to anyone who has the answer, do share with me. If love is to be measured by the wealth you own, then what about those who were married in the kampungs and how do you explain why their marriage lasted so long. If it is to be measured by the things that is sacrificed for him/her, how do you explain love at first sight?

The most important question we have to constantly ask and remind ourself, what was it that made us fell in love with him/her. Smart people give reasons such as, 'oh, she is beautiful', 'she is smart' and lame excuses such as 'she was the one who was attracted to me first'. For those who are drowned in love, they places them above everything else, likened them to god and goddess. Back to the question, I don't even know why I fell in love with her. I guess you don't need a reason to love someone. There is just no reasoning in love... it is just not some math equation.

A statement I have to make here. It was not a competition neither it is now. It doesn't work that way, at least I believe so. There is no winner or loser. She is not the winning trophy. There is no first prize or consolation prize. Enough fighting and comparing. Comparison makes the whole effort seem fake, untrue and dishonest. Conclusion, I am done. I am done fighting, done struggling. Mind you though, this is not the end. Done fighting doesn't mean I gave up. Done struggling doesn't mean I give in.

Honda NTV650 Revere

2008-11-21T20:07:00.005+08:00

After much waiting for the never-will-arrive Kawasaki ER6-n, I have given up and continue my search for a used high powered motorcycle. Among the bikes that I have considered includes the Honda CB400SF, Honda Shadow VT600, Honda Magna 750 (I blogged about it before) but never once did it cross my mind that I will "meet" what I would say, one of the rarest bikes in Penang, previously owned by a very nice uncle, the Honda NTV650 Revere.

The Honda NTV650 Revere is the European version of the Honda Hawk GT647 which has now achieve its cult status in the United States. Both bikes uses the same 52 degrees V-twin 600cm3 engine, but it is bored out to achieve 647cm3 and utilizes a single overhead cam with 3 valve per cylinder and features the twin spark ignition. It produces about 50 something horsepower and 56 Newt. The Revere, compared side by side with the Hawk, has a larger fuel tank for better touring capability and a longer rear section. Besides that, it uses the shaft drive which is maintenance free compared to the chain drive of the Hawk, but the Hawk uses a better chassis which is made from aluminum compared to the Revere's steel frame.

On the run, the Revere feels a bit panicky. The front suspension is a wee bit on the soft side, but the rear seems adequate though. Surprisingly, the bike is capable to handle corners much better than you think it can. For your info, the Hawk and the Revere was regarded as a high tech motorcycle back then when it was launched in the late 1980's. It was probably one of the first few bikes back then to use the Honda Pro Am single arm on the rear of the bike. Besides giving it a really nice design for the swing arm and wheels, it also helps in weight reduction and enables the use of the single suspension, better known as Monoshock.

The bike is claimed to achieve the 62 mph sprint in under 4 seconds, but it seems a bit optimistic. Nonetheless, it will achieve 62 mph within the 5 second range. The only complaint that I have about the bike is that it is somewhat under equipped. The meter gauges only shows a speedometer, a tachometer, temperature, high beam, turn signals and neutral gear. It lacks the fuel gauge which is an important feature. The gearbox though claimed by others to be less precise, to me, it is okay but just a bit rough as you can hear the 'klonk' sound when you shift up or down.

So, hmm... why did I suddenly talk a whole lot about the Honda NTV650 Revere? It is because it is my bike now. The uncle has finally agreed to sell it to me, at somewhat a high price many has claimed. Though, dad has bought it for me. Hehehe. I am a happy man now, contented. I can finally say I am a proud owner of a very rare bike in Penang. Hahaha (freaking show off here, mind you, it is an old bike, so nothing to show to people). Alright, done talking. It is time to go back and polish the new member to the collection of bikes at my house now, beginning with the monster muscle bike, dad's Honda CB1300SF, his Honda EX5, my Yamaha Lagenda Z and my Suzuki FX125 cyber sport, THE HONDA NTV650 REVERE.

The same original colour, the same wheels, totally original...

A full list of things a guy DOESN'T wish women knew.

2008-11-19T08:50:00.002+08:00

Hahahahaha. Well, I am a different guy. I want all girls to know. Hahahaha again. LOL. My friend posted this in his friendster bulletin and I just have to steal it. Hahaha again. Here are some examples:

We secretly memorize everything you wear. (this is scary, LOL)

Don't tell us to tell you if you look bad. Just... stop. We won't. Ever. Under no circumstances.

Not all guys are afraid of commitment.

Likewise, not all guys want to take advantage of you so please, for the love of god, get over your "I hate men" bitching.

Honestly, we really do think all girls are uglier than you. It's how our brains work. So quit asking.

Sometimes the only things that motivate us to even try at all in school are our wonderful girlfriends.

We say you don't need to dress up for us or wear makeup for us... but we sure would like you too!

We're not kidding when we say we'll trash any guy that looks at you.

Tell us when we smell, please. We can't tell and our guy friends don't realize it.

But please don't smell, we have this concept in our mind that girls are supposed to smell like flowers and sunshine.

When your boyfriend is a nerd, the least you can do is pretend to listen to him when he attempts to tell a funny story about his guild in World of Warcraft, or attempts to explain the physics of a tachyon.

Oh, and nerds really are better lovers.

After reading it, I just can't stop laughing though some are facts, some are truths. Hahahahaha... The laughing continues...

GO GET A LIFE...

2008-11-17T18:01:00.007+08:00

This week is not going to be a very pleasurable week. To start the week with such an issue, it is the last thing any living person would ask for. Well, what goes around comes around. It was easy for me to say back then; to just ignore comments and other's opinion. Back then, I was not the victim. Now, it's a totally different story.

Well, I can't blame others for their curiosity. I, myself did contributed to this problem. Being a loud person, I don't really care if others may hear what I have just said. Nonetheless, this, my friends, is different. This does not only involve me as it also involves another individual. I am not seeking for fame nor am I looking for glory. I pray hard to control myself. I hope I will get through this issue alive. That's if they stop what they are doing now or it's going to be their funeral. The sight of those people, I may not be a big sized guy, I may not be a street fighter but nothing beats a guy whose heart is full of rage. I, myself don't even know what I am capable of... at least when I am angry.

Well, do I sound like the green beast a.k.a the Hulk, "you don't like me when I'm angry?" LOL. Anyway, there is a statement that I have to make. If I can respect you/anyone, I hope for nothing back in return except the same kind/amount of respect given to you/anyone. I would really appreciate it if anyone or any of you guys whom I recognize and acknowledge as friends to ask me personally if you are concerned or have an interest over matters about my life. I don't need free publisity in college (enough popularity, okay?) and I certainly don't need gossips and grapevines flowing around classes. This, I beg of you; if you don't respect me, the least you can do is to respect that other individual.

This, I have to stress. I AM NOT JOKING HERE neither am I making a FOOL out of myself. Don't push it. Don't cross the borderline. Don't exceed the limit. I can tell you, you are this close to making me lose control. That my friend is the limit that you should know. Again, I am asking you nicely to stop all the nonsense you are doing. If you have your personal agenda or if it's just for fun, well read this, "GO GET A LIFE".

Okay, done talking about college and people in college. Now, time to update you guys on my recent fishing trip this past weekend. THREADFIN. I think it's their season this time of the year. A few kilos everyday, for two days. Hehehe. Allow me to show you guys a pic of the biggest threadfin I caught recently. May not be big for you guys, but it is big enough for me. =D

A few kilos. Maybe 12 kilos. Hehehe...

Biggest threadfin for the day, weighing at 600+ grams and 16 inches in length.

CK's not so extraordinary life

Please, never say never

Keri Hilson - Knocks you down (feat Kanye West and Ne-yo)

William So Yong Kang - A Man Shouldn't Let A Woman Cry

Transformer 2: Revenge of the Fallen [Awesome but not great]

Night at Jerry's condo

Once a year, every year

"I wanna go out"

The Premier College in Penang... (the story behind it)

Am I Still The One?

A not so good weekend

Boys II Men - End of the Road

Something... LOL...

Strange but true ll

Strange but true

First Cantonese Song in my blog

Assignments...

Did both idiots just pranked me???

James Blunt - Tears and Rain

Just another weekend

Yes

What about me?

Joseph Rudyard Kipling, If

If you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you, If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you but make allowance for their doubting too,

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies, Or being hated, don’t give way to hating And yet not look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - but not make dreams your master, If you can think - but not make thoughts your aim; If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster And treat those two imposters just the same;

If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools, Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken, And stoop and build them up with worn-out tools

If you can make one heap of all your winnings And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss And lose, and start again at your beginnings And never breathe a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew To serve your turn long after they are gone, And so hold on, when there is nothing in you Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on!”

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, Or walk with kings, yet not lose the common touch, If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you; If all men count with you, but none too much,

If you can fill the unforgiving minute With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run Yours is the Earth and everything in it, And, what is more, you’ll be a Man, my son!

What is gonna make you happy? Ever thought of that?

It's been 3 weeks

First encounter

U2

CK is blind

Boring Saturday

Jordin Sparks - Battlefield

Coldplay - Life in Technicolor ii (HD)

Retard-ism (mid terms)

After The Hurricane

What a Great day... (arghhhh!!!)

Gabrielle, out of reach

F17 to the rescue... CK and dad to the rescue... LOL

Err??? Huh??? part 2

Errr??? huh???

Elliot Yamin is back

Looking for the place where love and feeling good don't ever cost a thing

CK can't stop hahaha... -ing and hehehe...-ing

Tire blues (CK is crazy, LOL)

Songs and more songs...

Flu is killing me...

Regrets often arrive too late...

Physical pain ... but it ain't half as pain as ...

I miss you. I really do.

A great deal of fun, and sunburn... wahaha...

What Hurts the Most

My Car Still Stinks!!!

Tired

Ain't about how fast I get there, Ain't about what's waiting on the other side

Arghh!!!

Top 5 in my list

First solo ride around the beautiful Penang Island

Fuck My Life...

Mary J. Blige - Be Without You

You'll never know what life throws at you

The end of another week...

CK suka cari pasal...

Keri Hilson - Energy

Toothache made me blog about this... hahaha...

Happy Valentine's Day...

Like a moth to a flame

Chinese song again...

Cry On My Shoulder by Deutschland sucht den Superstar

Madness struck me

The story of A, Z, X and CK...

FISHING

Blue Eyes Blue

CNY

I’m gonna let the wind blow, Leave the past behind, The memories will do just fine...

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
but make allowance for their doubting too,

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating
And yet not look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - but not make dreams your master,
If you can think - but not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;

If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build them up with worn-out tools

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on, when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on!”

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings, yet not lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much,

If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run
Yours is the Earth and everything in it,
And, what is more, you’ll be a Man, my son!